I cam out and started transition 4 years ago. I remember being on the up in my life then depression set in. My life began spiraling out of control, I stopped training and competing in triathlon, I dropped out of school and all I ever did was lay down moped around and complained my head off about how horrible life was. There I was losing my friends, I thought they became my bullies but it was all in my head. I developed various dependency problems and was a victim of sexual assault. Then out of nowhere I met a friend on the whisper app of all places. Then half a year later we met in the spring, a couple months later he brings his friend from high to Applebees. She was really quiet and I met her again a couple weeks later at the beach and we kinda hit it off a bit. We start become closer together, I took her to pride and then one night a week later I take her to the beach. It was evening and as the sun was setting we were sitting on the lifeguard stand and I kissed her. I never asked, I just held her face and we kissed briefly and we laughed. 16 months later I am back in school, training for triathlon, I'm back to the structure of my old life though a little heavier, a lot slower and with a lot of residual issues I'm shaking off. I have made up with my friends after having burnt bridges and not seeing them for years. I learned that it was in my head, I broke down and I let myself get so severely out of control. I let my depression single handedly ruin my life. Now I am rebuilding and I learned from everything that when life is getting tougher, my anxiety and depression getting worse I need to get stronger and beat them back. I realized the only way I can treat it is to go higher and keep them down. I know if I keep my head in the game and pay my dues I will earn the life I truly deserve but only if I take it for myself!
