Harassment at school, anxiety and other

[somnolentprince]

Hi guys! I'm new here, and I've been trying to find good transgender resources for a while and this website is near perfect.

I'm a pre-transition transboy in highschool (Sophomore year) and I've been dealing with harassment in the locker room and in class. I use the male locker oom, and I constantly get remarks and stares. I have intense anxiety everyday because I'm worried that I'll be outed and get beat up or hurt. I pass decently, but my voice or feminine body shape always gives me away. There are several guys who I know would hurt me if I said something wrong or if one of my friends outed me. I'm quite scared, and going to school has been harder and harder. Most people suggest, "Oh, just go back to the girls locker room! Its safer and smells better!!" I'm not a girl though. I don't want to, I'd probably have frequent anxiety attacks anyway just having to deal with going in there. I'm not sure what to do, other than stay quiet and change quickly. I need advice on how to cope with that or do something about it.

In class, I have to deal with the constant passive-aggressiveness from my classmates and occasionally the teacher. (This is specifically first period) I walk in through the door, everyone stares. I sit down, people glare. Someone has to sit in my seat? They pretend to wipe it off and gag while looking at me. They refuse to call me by he/him pronouns. My teacher doesn't do anything about it. He's completely ignorant, and also never uses my pronouns. (Even though administration specifically told my teachers that I go by he/him)

I wake up every day, fearful of what may happen at school. Hopefully I will be able to find support and advice here. Thank you so much for listening and I hope you all have a good day! 

[Dena]

Welcome to Susan's Place. Unfortunately your options are few. You can live with it. Overpowering most likely isn't an option so that leave taking it up with the same people who approved your assuming the new role. They will need to educate the teachers involved and if they start protecting you to much, you may earn the name teacher pet.

The other issue is I suspect the teacher that incorrectly genders you has without knowledge outed you to the entire school. You may have been able to pass effectively but once the teacher used the incorrect gender, people in the class started looking. Once they saw what was going on, the word went out on the grape vine so all but a few know.

If you have a therapist, I suggest you discuss this as soon as possible because you have a very difficult decision to make. I really don't know enough about you yet to give you a good answer as it sounds like stealth is no longer an option.

We issue to all new members the following links so you will best be able to use the web site.

Things that you should read

• Site Terms of Service and rules to live by
  
• Standard Terms and Definitions
  
• Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
  
• Reputation rules
  
• News posting & quoting guidelines
  
• Photo, avatars, and signature images policy
  

[somnolentprince]

Yeah. I now know that stealth isn't going to be an option until I'm at least a few months on testosterone and discuss things more with teachers. Thank you for replying! I understand this whole thing is going to be hard and I hope to become more confident in myself. I'm sure once I start HRT I won't care as much about the people who are rude to me. 

[Dena]

T might make you comfortable with your self but it won't make you comfortable with others. It will take time and exposure to remain cool when people don't treat you as you want to be treated. To some degree you will always be somewhat sensitive but the longer you are on T, the less often it will happen.