Only dysphoric when considering transition???

[FuschiaLipstick]

How come I only feel dysphoria when I accept I'm trans ? Iv been on and off about being transgender for about 2-3 years now going from trans to fem male or to just trying to be male but one of the reasons I wanted to be not transitioning was cause I didn't wanna deal with my body worries etc when I consider transition my hands and shoulders bother me etc ( not so much penis I'll get SRS in the future but not due to dysphoria but preference) does this mean I'm not trans ? When I pretend to be male it goes away but also always comes back and doesn't make me feel happpy being a male I feel like I gave up on transition out of worries but worry if my dysphoria is only felt when I consider transition what's that mean ?

[Dena]

Transgender means you are uncomfortable in some way with your birth gender. From your posting history, I would say that describes you. The problem is figuring out where you are and what will make you comfortable. That could be anywhere from a occasional crossdresser to a complete transition. That is the question you need to answer and a gender therapist could be a big help with that. I reviewed your posting history and while I responded to some of your questions, it appears I haven't given you the links that you may need to explore. The first is our WIKI where transgender is defined. The next is "the transition channel" where you will get more information on transsexualism. Explore both links and let me know on this thread if you have more questions.

[Nikolai]

maybe you just aren't ready to transition yet?, I remember 3 years ago I was thinking of transitioning but the idea of actually going through with it made me sick, surgery etc put me off. now with the idea of surgery I'm like bring it on! I'm one month on T, there is also no rush to transition, you'll know when you are ready.

[Jean24]

I had that problem, and here's why:

1. The lack of social support by society in general causes huge amounts of stress. Not surprising, as it is as scary facing the thought of constant social rejection for the rest of your life.

2. MOST importantly, this isn't very real or as real as it should be, because the surgical and medical techniques which are currently being used are so primitive. Part of the reason it's hard to gain acceptance in the first place is because we can't fit in, we can't fit in because the medical procedures are lacking, and the medical procedures are lacking because:
A. Society doesn't care enough to help us because we're heavily stigmatized.
B. Transgender people tend to be poor, have less access to education, small in number, and are indoctrinated into believing that better medical care (if all transgender people could pass/be cis) would eliminate diversity and acceptance. So the little influence that we do have is essentially discarded.

It causes tons of stress because knowing all of that I feel like the choice of transitioning is a lose/lose situation. This postpones my transition and creates dysphoria.

I hope this helps, if only to understand yourself!

[JMJW]

It's possible the dysphoria only becomes noticeable retrospectively once you accept it's existence. Alot of dysfunction can be normalized and seem routine. I know that's the case with me. I wasn't always actively thinking about transition like I am now. But still dysfunctional. Still not wanting to go outside etc. The feelings may alternate and dysphoria may come and go in waves, is the actual behaviour different? There's the question.