will my relationship with my gay bf work...(i lived as a gay man before)

[chloe1616]

so yeah, i was a gay man before transitioning...now im living as a full time woman and still committed with my gay bf..i think he is okay with it(somehow) but he doesnt refer to me as a woman still....until now he is like, you look like a trans now...in my mind, well i am duh....and it kinda bothers me seeing him in fb adding all those men.....im like, so how will this work out ofr us in the long run...i know he is going to look for that masculine figure, so will i...i mean, im getting so much attention from hot straight men and im digging it.......sigh

any of you in the same situation as me?
like honestly, im more than passable but he kinda still see me as a man and it kinda irks me

[Ms Grace]

If he's gay then pretty much by definition he is into men not women. He might have been hot for you when you were still presenting as male but unless he is bi or pan then it's likely a hetro relationship won't work well for him in the long run. If you are presenting as a woman and he feigns ignorance of that then he is most likely in denial about your transition. If you need this relationship to keep working in a way that suits you both then some communication between you both will be essential.

[Garnet]

Sexuality is no easy thing, even for people who say they hardline straight or gay. I currently have 2 partners, one of a year and a half(Jared), and the other of 6 years(James).

Jared is very much into both women and men, so my transition is exciting for him.

James is only interested in men, but I still have my penis and a fairly masculine body, with A cups...but he is interested in me still. I think that will probably not change. But we have one less thing to worry about, none of us are monogamous.

It sounds like you are getting pretty jealous, so I think you should have a sit down with him, if the way he refers to you upsets or invalidates you, tell him. Explain clearly how you are changing, and feeling. Maybe it will work out...but if it doesn't, I'm sure you can find someone who loves you for you :3.

[JoanneB]

It has been, and still is, a long steep climb for my SO to get pronouns and name right when I am in female mode. And it's been a good 7 years. TB fair, it's also been almost 40 years of be being just a CD and her seeing me occasionally present as female. "Occasional" is just a bit more often now as I am still living and presenting primarily as male for host of reasons