I'm inclined to go with Kylo on this. He brings up a very salient point.
Quote from: Kylo on December 26, 2016, 09:32:27 AM
You need to kill the root of the weed.
What exactly are you afraid of? And why should you be afraid of it now?
You mention that since the end of your marriage, this has manifested itself. What is it about the darkness that isn't there in the light?
I've noticed that a lot of the time, when people have irrational fears, they're actually based on very real fears to do with associations we make with the things we're scared of. And the defense mechanisms of those real fears kicking in. Like the mind says "run, run away. Here's a shot of adrenaline to help!" Often, getting past fear is understanding where it comes from, and the underlying reasons for it.
There are people way more qualified than I who can help you work through this, and as has been suggested, it may be worth contacting someone to help you deal with it. Having said that, however, sometimes I can't help meddling.

So I'll just throw a few things out there for you to think about.
What is darkness? A place where you can't see around you. Where you have little control over things that could be there which you can't see. And if you can't see it coming, you can't control what you do about it. You lay there and let things happen. Feeling helpless. You can only react.
Being traumatised by someone else is a loss of control. It's giving power over yourself to someone else. Feeling helpless. Being able only to react. See what I'm saying? Maybe somewhere deep down, those are the associations you have with darkness. And you subconsciously remember all those emotions you felt, what it almost drove you to. And this is where the fear comes from. The fear that it could happen again. And that is what you're afraid of.
Sweetie, I think a good step for you might be to work on taking that power and control over yourself back. To be master of your own surroundings. Telling yourself that it's just irrational won't work if it's based on something very real that your mind is trying to protect you from. I can't say it's an easy thing to do, at all. But it can be done.
Seeing someone in a professional capacity might be a good idea to help deal with this. But also keep a small notepad next to your bed. Every morning write down what happened during those periods of darkness. What you thought might happen and what actually happened. I would expect a whole lot of "nothing at all, it was fine". But you can look at this, over and over, each morning, to start to send the signal to your subconscious that "you know, every night you make me terrified, and every morning absolutely nothing happened that I should be afraid of. I was totally in control. Maybe it's time to just quit it! There's nothing there that can hurt me. I can get through the night just fine without you screwing it up, thank you very much. I can be at peace."
Reinforcing positive thought patterns is a good way to remove negative ones.
*hugs* You can do it.