Quick back story 9 months/2 days on HRT, started going full time long ago last year out of necessity due to my increasingly declining mental health from forcing myself to pretend/dress male in public so I essentially flipped the switch, had my hair done, clothes and never looked back, even though I was and still am far from ready I've been actually surprised how easy it's been so far.
Now to the actual story! Today I had another of my scheduled insurance paid for rides to my hour away doctors office for another IM injection training session. Another long story short my health insurance has been painfully slow correcting the name on file to my legal name thats been changed since last year (I'm F everywhere legally except insurance to protect against denial of SRS as it's covered under my insurance) So the name on the drivers patient list the first 2 rides to my doctors has been my deadname (you can imagine how awkward, embarrassing and dead I felt inside being full time and dressing in feminine
attire.makeup and having to pull up to the drivers car and have him ask me "Are you XXXXXX?" T_T) BUT it was finally corrected for this trip and had completely new drivers so now awkwardness yay! The way up there the first driver kept calling me young lady, refering me as she to the other people in the car and it was soooo nice and I was super giddy on the inside!
The best part is what happened on the way home! New driver this time and about halfway on the way back he asked me how old I was and what high school I went to and after I answered he mentioned that he went there too and graduated a couple years after me and then said the best thing I've ever heard in my life "I knew it! You were one of the girls whose faced I remember seeing in the halls of highschool!" Obviously that's impossible but I don't care it was the happiest and best moment of my transition so far! T_T As a little cherry on the top the lady in the back seat conversed with me a bit and she gave me her name and I gave her mine and she stopped for a second and said "Wow that's a really pretty name" Outside a sore left thigh from my IM and terrible car sickness both ways today has been so wonderful T_T
When I got home I started thinking how can so many people see me unquestionably female as I haven't even had so much as a stare from anyone in all my months of full time but everytime I look in a mirror I just have such a hard time seeing anything feminine about my face even after 9+ months. Is the dysphoria truly that powerful of a thing that it can completely distort the real image of how I look to myself vs how everyone else sees me?
