Hi, everyone!
Wow, it's been a while. I found this site way back when i first identified as FtM transgender and was heavily involved in the research stage - probably around 2007/2008. I disappeared from the forums and internet for a while, partly to focus on my life and partly because i wasn't getting anywhere with the transition (my parents were not supportive) but now i'm back.
I'm actually further along in my transition now than i was then - i'm pre-everything, but i've identified as male and mostly lived as male (using male or neutral pronouns when possible, masculinizing my name, etc etc) since i came out to my parents in 2010. In my mind, i was always he/him/his and that's how i saw myself in the future.
Back then, in 2010, i didn't have my parents support and that just about did me in. I'm very close to my parents and i can't really imagine not having them in my life. They where going through the stages of grief, i guess, and the therapist we went to (not a specialist) didn't really help us/them along. So we swept it under the rug. I focused on my career. Gave them time to process things.
Recently i've been feeling more down about it and decided i couldn't wait forever. So now i'm more active in transitioning, i have my mom's tentative support (she came to me initially and i've sort of run with that), we're working on my dad, and i'm looking at HRT being a near-future thing. I'm hoping for this year, fingers crossed.
It's been a long road. I've been struggling with mild depression because of it. But things are looking up and i'm back on here to (hopefully) connect with people and learn some more (you never stop learning new things!)
