Looking Forward

[DawnOday]

I am looking forward to Esprit this next week in the Pacific Northwest. The opportunity to get out and enjoy others just like me is something I never would have considered as my dead self. I avoided others at all costs. I was accused to serving no purpose at parties other than to hold up the walls and get plastered. I am not a party animal but I do like music and dancing. I am from the disco era. Think polyester and platform shoes except at 6'4" I don't really need platforms. And really, would you be caught dead in polyester these days? Before I go, I have an appointment with my new headshrink.  He has made me comfortable in my own skin.
   I am considering moving and I have two possible locations. San Jose and Las Vegas. I don't want to leave home and give up on a relationship that took 35 years to build. but I can no longer ignore the 800 lb gorilla, that is my dysphoria. I am also on fixed income having squandered my pension years ago after a heart attack. I've started over several times but I was much younger then. I would prefer to stay in Seattle as I know pretty much where everything is. Like who makes the best chocolate croissants  LA would not be a problem either. On the other hand would you rather have an In-n-out burger or Dicks. I still don't know why Seattlites are gaga over Dicks. I prefer secret sauce (thousand Island) over tarter sauce any day.

[CynthiaAnn]

On the other hand would you rather have an In-n-out burger or Dicks. I still don't know why Seattlites are gaga over Dicks. I prefer secret sauce (thousand Island) over tarter sauce any day.

In n Out hands down over Dicks

C -

[Northern Star Girl]

@DawnOday
Dear Dawn:
Yes indeed, where you live has much more moderate weather than central California or Vegas... plus depending on where you relocate I think that housing and cost of living and higher state sales and income taxes in California might be something to consider.
If you live in the city of Seattle and some of the suburbs the cost of housing is high from what I read and the sales tax in Seattle is high too.   I don't think that Washington state has an income tax, so that is a big advantage over California....  and Las Vegas has a much lower sales tax and Nevada has no State Income Tax.

I hate moving and relocating...  I did that almost 3 years ago when I pulled up stakes and moved where I am now.

Regarding hamburgers, my next door coffee shop puts to shame any of the fast food places that I have been.   But that is  probably not the biggest factor in your moving considerations.

You obviously need to live where you want to live and to be happy.  I am wishing you well with your decisions.
Hugs and best wishes,   
Danielle

I am looking forward to Esprit this next week in the Pacific Northwest. The opportunity to get out and enjoy others just like me is something I never would have considered as my dead self. I avoided others at all costs. I was accused to serving no purpose at parties other than to hold up the walls and get plastered. I am not a party animal but I do like music and dancing. I am from the disco era. Think polyester and platform shoes except at 6'4" I don't really need platforms. And really, would you be caught dead in polyester these days? Before I go, I have an appointment with my new headshrink.  He has made me comfortable in my own skin.
   I am considering moving and I have two possible locations. San Jose and Las Vegas. I don't want to leave home and give up on a relationship that took 35 years to build. but I can no longer ignore the 800 lb gorilla, that is my dysphoria. I am also on fixed income having squandered my pension years ago after a heart attack. I've started over several times but I was much younger then. I would prefer to stay in Seattle as I know pretty much where everything is. Like who makes the best chocolate croissants  LA would not be a problem either. On the other hand would you rather have an In-n-out burger or Dicks. I still don't know why Seattlites are gaga over Dicks. I prefer secret sauce (thousand Island) over tarter sauce any day.

[HappyMoni]

Dawn,
   In theory, I like Dicks. Oh wait, you talking food? Whoops! Here Dick's is either a sporting goods store or nursery for plants. I know nothing of the west coast. I'm flying into Texas this summer. That will be my furthest west venture. They say everything is bigger in Texas. Wondering if that applies to their version of Dick's. Hmmm! I digress, I am an east coast girl I guess. I hope you do well if you decide to reinvent yourself. It can be scary but also refreshing.
Moni
All this Dick talk is making me hungry! Now what's this in and out burger, you dirty girl?

[Rayna]

Hi Dawn,

First, I love your avatar. Hadn't seen it before, but I've been away.

I'm a bit nonplussed that you'd give up your relationship with your wife, but I understand the conflict of your dysphoria. I had just thought you were in a stable situation with her. I'm always sensitive to situations like yours because they resonate with me in my 35-year relationship with my wife. It troubles me when others can't make it work, but I am sympathetic.

As for Dick's vs In-N-Out, like with Moni, Dick's is a sporting goods chain to me. In-N-Out makes great fries but they don't survive the trip home. Eat 'em within 50 yards. As a vegetarian I can't comment on their burgers.

Good luck and keep us informed!
love Randy

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[DawnOday]

Moni, Whose got a dirty mind?
In-n-out burger used to be exclusively in California, and Las Vegas. About five years ago they built restaurants in Texas. They were also the original drive thru. The first one in Baldwin Park is where we used to go as far back as the /1950's. They are consistently rated the best franchise burger in the country. In my college days I had one every day. Dicks is a Seattle landmark but as hard as I try, it is hard to put Dicks in my mouth. It is just really kind of gross. I am sorry to hear you are going to Texas. However if you are near Austin. drive a few miles to Lockhart for the best BBQ you will EVER have. And if you can control yourself stay away from Dickies bbq. It sucks so you don't have to.

Danielle - Washington does not have income tax but despite that we have some of the highest taxes in he country. Oregon does not have sales tax. I moved up to Seattle in 97 to work on what at the time was the largest system reconfiguration outside the government. Over a billion dollars was spent. I had spent my life up to age 45 living in a suburb of Los Angeles. The month before I moved the weather was in the 100's for most the month and when I came here it was snowing. I have only visited San Jose a few times but it seems like a good place to live. They have in-n-out burgers. And Cattlemans steakhouse.  It's not far from SF. I would be living with someone who has been in love with me and vice versa for 30 years. She say's my coming out has not changed her mind about me and she is willing to let me be me. I just worry about getting health care. I can't get Kaiser in Vegas but I can in San Jose. Kaiser has a great transgender program.  Mark Twain said this about SF. "The coldest winter I ever saw was the summer I spent in San Francisco." but San Jose is across the bay and is far more likely to endure hot summers.
My family is so important to me. I hate the idea of moving away but I have waited far too long to be myself.

Randy- My wife knows that I love her but I am not "in love" with her. I have at his point in time therapy sessions with a gender therapist and a Psychiatrist. Both are telling me for my own sanity I should present full time.  They have asked me to bring her to sessions but she refuses. She also refuses to let me present in my own home. The kids are grown but the Grand babies are so cute I will have a hard time being away from them. However if I move to Vegas my sister is an hour away and I will be able to see her more often. My sister is such an influence on my life, I feel maybe that is the best way to go.  Such a hard decision. If I do move to San Jose I have the possibility of getting a $45 an hour job and the employer would pay the rent and issue an SUV.

Love you ladies. xxoo

[HappyMoni]

Dawn,
   I really need to be a dirty girl, but haven't managed it yet. Texas is a brief stop to get  on a ship. Never been on a cruise, so gonna try it. Maybe I can get good and filthy there. At least filthy.
   I understand the need to stop the presentation switch over. It sounds like your situation is very frustrating. I hope you find a good solution to finally be you all the time. Everybody is pullin for ya Dawnie! 
Moni

[Gertrude]

They have in and out here in AZ. It's ok. I prefer it to most other fast food burgers. There 5 guys too and whataburger. The former is over priced. On Long Island we had All American. It's been around for nearly 60 years. Cash only. The best place in AZ is The Chuck Box in Tempe. Charcoal grill in the place. I can smell it firing up in the morning when I go to work. White Castle is coming to Scottsdale too.


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