Hello, Rachael, and welcome to Susan's!
My sexual orientation is lesbian and I am ts, F to F. I expect to be on the list for surgery in June 2008.
When I reported to work in my true gender I was graciously accepted by most of the women there.
I always got on well with all of the gay people working there, both male and female. They sensed that my friendship came from the heart and they were comfortable with me. The most effusive greeting I received was from a woman whom I had always spoken with and known to be lesbian. She saw me in the hall and stopped me to give me a warm hug. I was humbled because I felt that the hug was from one whom I define as a "woman's woman."
Without labels soup cans would be a pain-in-the-butt to work with but labels are not necessary, as you well know.
There is no reason, IMHO, for your friends to shun you because of whom you date. I don't believe that person to be any more male that one of us in jeans and a flannel shirt, driving a Jeep. There are radicals among all groups and lesbians are no different.
About 10 years or more ago, when I was living in the DC suburbs, three people were murdered at a Starbuck's in Georgetown. Some of the more radical lesbians, the Fire Eaters, took the murders to be a hate crime because the manager was a gay woman. They stood on a street corner near the Starbucks, ranted a lot, then actually took fire in their mouths like performers. When it was found to have been a botched robbery and a suspect had been apprehended they didn't go back on TV to rescind the fire.
I can only wish that you and Serra be happy and don't let anyone else live your lives.
Wing Walker
