Insecure about my waist and hips.

[Inarasarah]

Growing up over many decades I have seen the "ideal" of feminine beauty change.  Sometimes it is the lean athletic look, sometimes it is more gender neutral, sometimes it is very shapely.  Often these trends come in and out of fashion line hairstyles and hem lines. We happen to live in a time when the "ideal" is being shaped by women like Kim Kardasiian and Nicki Menaj (sp?). 

To be honest, I love looking at a very shapely woman.  But I have always wanted to have that athletic look for myself.  But when I look at cis women, I find that very few actually fit either "ideal"  or any for that matter.  These are constructs we make to define someone as beautiful.  But many women trans and cis can never live up to these "standards". 

I spend a great deal of my time with women who are half my age, in great shape, each having their own body size.  Not one of them meets these idealized standards, but none of them would ever be mistaken as anything other than a woman.  When I look in the mirror, I see the signs of age catching up with me.  I see a woman who is getting older.  I have a body that is feminine, somewhat athletic, a little fat in places, a little saggy in others.  But it is mine, curves and all.  Now that I have lost weight, my curves are defining themselves but I will never have those extreme curves.

Short of surgery, there is often little that can be done to achieve the new "curvy" ideal.  Just remember that we do not know what the ideal will be in 10 years or even 5 years.  I often wonder that in 10 years from now if the ideal changes to that of a more slender look, will we be seeing women rushing out to plastic surgeons to have their BBLs reversed or implants removed.  Oh the things we do in the name of beauty.

Remember that each of you are beautiful and the fact that you are doing what you can to live authentically makes you the most beautiful person in the world. 

-Sarah

[ele]

If you can afford it, a brazilian butt lift can increase your hip size.

[SarahGemini]

I love IanaraSarah's post.   I've chased this elusive goal of hip to waist ratio for a long time.  Bouts of mild anorexia and also excessive exercise.   

I'm still not totally there but I think with age I've grown to appreciate the huge spectrum of female and male forms and we are all beautiful.  I have focused on fitness and having a healthy body more than shape.  Eating better but also things I like.  I am an active triathlete and so I'm also proud of my body and what it can do.  The little mean self-critical voices are always trying to push through and remind me my hips are relatively narrow but I refocus myself on the abs and boobs many others love or admire on me and let the hip absence go.   I'm not perfect but I'm me and I've slowly become better at loving myself and not comparing myself.   

I think we are all beautiful. 

Sarah

[Ypsf09]

Growing up over many decades I have seen the "ideal" of feminine beauty change.  Sometimes it is the lean athletic look, sometimes it is more gender neutral, sometimes it is very shapely.  Often these trends come in and out of fashion line hairstyles and hem lines. We happen to live in a time when the "ideal" is being shaped by women like Kim Kardasiian and Nicki Menaj (sp?). 


Short of surgery, there is often little that can be done to achieve the new "curvy" ideal.  Just remember that we do not know what the ideal will be in 10 years or even 5 years.  I often wonder that in 10 years from now if the ideal changes to that of a more slender look, will we be seeing women rushing out to plastic surgeons to have their BBLs reversed or implants removed.  Oh the things we do in the name of beauty.

Maybe we can strive for something like below: Uber curvy, yet skinny yet athletic so that it's evergreen and doesn't ever go out of fashion. Though this look for would require a lot more work, but think this is more desirable than Kim k or Nikki Minajs body.

https://matome.naver.jp/odai/2142517526080444801/2142517958686038303

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/c8/71/49/c87149b4dccb87af38f1586cfd65fbb8.jpg

[KayXo]

And, in my opinion, quite unrealistic. But, to each their own.

[kittenpower]

And, in my opinion, quite unrealistic. But, to each their own.

I think Cassandra Cass has a similar figure, but who wants to keep having surgery; at some point you have to be satisfied with what you have, or you will never be happy. Also the more surgery you have, the less natural you will look, so for all who want to be stealth it just makes you stand out that much more, and held up to more scrutiny.

[RavenMoon]

Hormones won't change your waist or hips. Females have a wider pelvis. They also have a different torso length. Hormones don't change that stuff. At best you might get some fat moving around. But how much extra fat do you have? I have very little.


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[Jenna Marie]

RavenMoon, it's true that hormones typically don't change bone structure after puberty. However, what people mean when they refer to "hips" in the fashion/figure sense isn't the bones of the pelvis but rather the widest point of the upper thighs. That sort of "hips" is all fat deposits, and HRT certainly can affect it, particularly in women who do have enough extra fat.

In addition, the added weight to my butt and a shift in my center of balance means that I now stand with my pelvis tilted in a "female" way (not consciously, but it's the only way to stand comfortably now). So between the extra padding and the posture change, I'd be very surprised if anyone looking at me short of an X-ray could tell much about my actual pelvic bones.

[RavenMoon]

Not "typically"... hormones don't change bones at all.

And you might be imagining that you are tilted like a cis female. But again, that's from their pelvis. People born male have a narrower pelvis, and the center of gravity is different. That's for carrying a child.

So you want fat legs and butt to simulate hips? No thanks! I work hard to stay thin.

Lots of cis women have narrow hips and they look just fine.


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[Jenna Marie]

RavenMoon: You are, of course, welcome to prefer anything you want for your own body, but it's a bit unkind to describe others' preferences that way. Personally, yes, I like having curves.

In any case, I think you're misunderstanding a bit - that's what "hips" means for cis women, too, when they're talking about fashion. If you look up any measurement guide for how to figure out a size for dresses/pants, you're likely to find that the "hips" measurement is taken at the widest point of the thighs. That's what I was trying to explain: the medical definition of "hips" may refer to the actual pelvic bones, but the usage of the general population is for the thighs.

As for the tilt of my pelvis, it's also a bit rude to suggest I'm imagining it, but I've now had half a dozen medical professionals tell me that I've lost an inch or so of height "probably because of how you have more of a curve to your back and tilt to your pelvis now" (not to mention that that's apparently why I keep ending up with lower back pain, or so my doctor says). I suppose they could all be making it up too, but I'm inclined to trust their judgment. Again, though, that's just a shift in posture, not bone structure.

[tgirljuliewilson]

It's going to be a battle for all of us, wanting some extra body fat, but only in the places we want it (!).  There's no "right" or "wrong" way to go about it, just each to every girl's taste.

I know the body I want to have, and I know I'm not there yet.  Until then, I'll continue to have to settle with pads to attain my resulting shape....  (sigh).

[Dani]

Attractive women usually have a body fat of about 20 to 22 %. For men it should be about 6 or 7 % less. For all you ladies out there, if you are less than 20% body fat, you will not have enough fat for boobs and hips that move like any other woman.

Ladies, we need some fat, but not too much. If you need to redistribute some fat areas, then that is what liposuction is for.

[Angélique LaCava]

Attractive women usually have a body fat of about 20 to 22 %. For men it should be about 6 or 7 % less. For all you ladies out there, if you are less than 20% body fat, you will not have enough fat for boobs and hips that move like any other woman.

Ladies, we need some fat, but not too much. If you need to redistribute some fat areas, then that is what liposuction is for.

my doctor told me I have 20% body fat.

[Dani]

my doctor told me I have 20% body fat.

Angelique,

You are right where you need to be. Just let the HRT work its magic. It takes time.

[Angélique LaCava]

Angelique,

You are right where you need to be. Just let the HRT work its magic. It takes time.

changes happen after 1.5 years? Everyone makes it seem like changes are done after a year, atleast the noticeable changes. I'm still not quite happy with my face. Is there hope that my face could change some more despite being 1.5 years on hormones?

[Colleen_definitely]

According to girls at group therapy, yes.  Same from my endo and therapist.  Things will continue for 3-5 years according to them.

As for personal experience, ask me in 3-5 years because I'm off to go pick up my first pack of magic pills.  I just hope they're as good to me as they have been to you,.

[Angélique LaCava]

According to girls at group therapy, yes.  Same from my endo and therapist.  Things will continue for 3-5 years according to them.

As for personal experience, ask me in 3-5 years because I'm off to go pick up my first pack of magic pills.  I just hope they're as good to me as they have been to you,.

my endo said that most of the changes happen during the first year. Hope your endo is right and mine is wrong. Congrats on starting hormones. Your not going to feel yourself the first month so don't panic if you have muscle pains,headaches,and nausea. It's normal. Just drink lots of water.

[Colleen_definitely]

Thanks.

I think your endo is probably right in that many of the BIG changes happen in the first year but things will continue especially in the breast development and fat redistribution departments.

[Angélique LaCava]

Thanks.

I think your endo is probably right in that many of the BIG changes happen in the first year but things will continue especially in the breast development and fat redistribution departments.

i didn't even start seeing facial changes until a year on hormones unfortunately.

[KayXo]

I started HRT 13 yrs ago. Even in recent years, I've seen substantial changes and comparing my pics now or 1-2 yrs ago to those HRT + 1-3 yrs, there is a big difference!!! Breasts grow, shrink, etc. All depending on your hormones, if changes are made, lifestyle changes. Things never remain static.

At this moment, my boobs are bigger than they were 6 months ago so...