Maybe this will help accepting or identifying your trans

[vicki_sixx]

There's a lot of posts where people are questioning themselves, looking for answers, looking for validation and it's sure as hell a crazy time. I was invited to share my thoughts and feelings via a video (not my video or my You Tube channel) on a lot of ground and I do so candidly and honestly and maybe it will help some of you, too.

I do not post it for self-promotion - especially as it may bring me grief from the sensitive types who make up the majority - but because I wish someone had done the same for me not so long ago. Beware, I don't churn out 'safe' platitudes and I speak with a Northern English accent - a la Jon Snow - and there's no subtitles for Americans

I cover how I see trans, trans in the media, advice for newbies, how I identify, how to come out and my journey amongst other topics. There's plety of dry humour that will probably be misconstrued as being serious, lol.

Mod edit -Link removed due it breaks multiple TOS.

[JeanetteLW]

Hi Vicki,
 
   I watched your video and I liked it. I share many of your observations and opinions.

Jeanette

ps: You spell your name like my older sister did.  I miss her. I used to be able to talk to her about anything and I am sure I would be talking  to her now about me if I could.
 

[vicki_sixx]

Thank you. I just hope it can help someone - even if that's just to asure them it's normal to be confused or to feel themselves changing tack. I am sure your sister would have loved to have known all of you, girl and all x

[Violets]

Thank you for posting this, Vicki.

[Michelle_P]

Vicki, that's a great video.  You managed to pack far more into that than I see in even the largest 'Introduction' threads, and gave some good, clear explanations.

I hope it proves useful to all those who are curious or just starting to explore themselves.

Thank you for doing this.
Michelle

[Tammy]

This is a great video, Vicki. Thank you! x

[Charlie Nicki]

This was a great video. Thank you!

[Cara_DarkCloud]

Great video Vicki.

[SadieBlake]

You present well and I'm glad to hear your heartfelt views.

However, a spectrum where the bottom is crossdressers and ->-bleeped-<-s and the top is transexuals? That's not a spectrum (red isn't better than green, blue or violet, it's simply different). And what about taking my fashion tips from "real women"? Sorry, I'm every bit as much a real woman as a natal female. Of course I agree if one wants to pass then modelling natal women is the right way to go, it's just a question of language.

Your need to define who's trans and who's not again, isn't your call. Nevermind that a gay man who simply chooses to transgress gender norms is iny mind trans if that's what he chooses to call himself, ultimately it's always up to the individual, nor others to define their own identity.

I would rather say we can identify many dimensions of being transgender. Passing or not or non-binary, medically transitioning to whatever degree or not, etc, etc. Most would agree that the most essential element is whether our brain and thinking is relatively feminine or masculine, however I would always allow that if a person's circumstances, rather than biological determination makes them trans then they're simply trans to me.

[vicki_sixx]

Violets, Cara, Charlie, Tammy, Michelle,

Thank you so much. xxx



Sadie,

You're welcome to disagree and I thank you for your feedback. A spectrum is exactly what I described though, even it it's not to your liking. I never said one is better than the other, only that moving across the spectrum is to move towards being a woman full-time. I certainly don't feel superior because I've moved up the scale. I didn't have a need to define trans - the video was an interview and that was one of the questions asked. I have every right to define what trans is to me just as you do too. I agree that if you're trans then you're trans but there's minutae and evolution and that's what I tried to give a quick overview of. x

[vicki_sixx]

ultimately it's always up to the individual, nor others to define their own identity.

Absolutely, which is why my spectrum is only for the individual themselves. No one can tell you where you sit on the scale, be it 10% or 95%, only you can do that. My spectrum is literally a reflection of how I feel and that is how others should use it - a means of giving some kind of form to the abstract in our heads.

It is impossible for the spectrum to be used to compete against other people. I have gone from feeling 50% trans to 80% trans and the only person I am 'more trans' than is my former self. If Bob feels 60% trans and I feel 80% trans then all that tells us is that Bob is less certain that he's female than I am certain that I am female. His qualifying criteria might be a lot more stringent than mine and on his spectrum I may only be 45% whilst he on my scale might be 88%.

[vicki_sixx]

To the person who sent my video to Sky, thank you for thinking so highly of my performance and it was a very nice surprise to be contacted by them. xxx