Hello there everyone! My name is Victoria, or Vicky for short
so backstory to who I am. I was born Mike. I've gone through a lot in my 28 years on this earth. I ventured through life not really knowing much about gender or sexuality until I was 12. I had met a male on aol chat rooms way back then, and he was 10 years older than me. Now I know most will be like creep or petafile but this was never the case. He never asked me for pics or sent me anything. He was more of the big sibling I never had, since I'm an only child. We spoke for years online back then. My mother found out and heartened him so we stopped speaking which I was about 14 by then. So when I graduated high school I went to college in Florida for a semester and I ended up finding his screenanme again, we spoke and found out he was only 3 hrs from me. We agreed to meet and he drove all the way to campus, however I was so nervous I never went outside to meet him and I never heard from him again. So I failed out, joined the Marine Corps to get away from home life in NJ and my family. I married early, 19 was my first time :/, didn't last so long or go so well. During the divorce I met my second wife, who is the mother of my now 6 yr old son. Things were ok until one day she noticed the things I was looking up online, srs surgery, trans stuff, girly things. She had me try on a pair of panties once and I guess that's where's it all started at 21 years old. I slowly started to realize I was born in the wrong body and the female that was asleep and hiding for 21 years wanted to come out. Initially she handled it ok, I dressed around our house but it was kept secret since then trans couldn't serve and cross dressing was considered to be a reason to be kicked out and discharged. Eventually she couldn't take it anymore or told her mom and they threatened her to leave me now, so she did. Luckily I found out short after she had a new boyfriend while our divorce was pending. So since that's a crime too (on his part) we decided to not mention each other's thing to make it civil. She prevented me from seeing my son for so long. Luckily I was honorably discharged before our divorce was finalized because I swear she would have outed me then. When it came time for visitation agreement her family was so furious that the judge in NC sided with me and allowed me to have my son in NJ because his sister is transgender. She hated me for so long and still does.
During the same time of me coming home from serving, I came out to my mom I'm transgender and I'm a girl. This was November of 2013. Soon after she told my dad (they are still married) and he seemed ok but I feel he just yes'd her to not have to argue. Deep down he didn't agree with it or want to even understand (given he has two lesbian sisters for autrociois family reasons). Feb of 2014 while attending college for a second time, I started hormones. I ended up trying to grow my hair out and even legally changed my name to Skylar at the time. I was enjoying myself so much. Noticing the changes about my body, but I was so depressed and sad because my family wouldn't allow me to dress how I wanted to, I was locked in my room. That was the only way I could dress. It wasn't enough for me so I started to walk around the house with my bra on and that did it. My dad told me to find another place to live if I'm going to continue with this lifestyle. Luckily, my godparents took me in and accepted me for who I am. The pain of being so lonely not having someone was killing me so I convinced my family I was Mike again for good. This took place all from Sept of 2014, so I barely made it 9 months of hormones. It's my biggest regret, stopping them
So fast track now, I got married to my third wife May of 1016. We've had some issues here and there mostly on my part, but I've come out to her numerous times and gone back and forth on feeling like a girl and not, when in reality I really and truly am a girl. She accepts me and love me for who I am, not what I am. I am truly blessed.
The hardest part is that I work in a very male driven industry and am so afraid of slowly transitioning at work for fear of retaliation. My wife keeps telling me who cares what people think, dress how you want and don't let the fear control you. I wish to be back on hormones again because I remember how in tune my mind finally was with the body I was slowly changing to. But we agreed to put them on hold for career wise since I'm trying to be in law enforcement. She tells me to be happy since I do have small A breasts from the previous hormones since there are trans women who can't even obtain hormones or afford, and to be ok with what I have for now but it's so hard because I know what they do and how much they were helping.
So anyways that my intro lol hehehe. Victoria is my name and I'm here to stay! (These forums too) lol
