Why do people think it's ok to touch me and ask personal questions?

[JMJW]

He said of course he did. Then he said "but she's not REALLY a girl".

Implying that he finds it acceptable to go around touching the chests of other men...which he doesn't because he knows he'd get punched in the teeth for it. Here's the thing, if my friend, any friend touched up by brother or sister like that, he has to leave, and he'll never be invited back. Period. Even if he apologized it wouldn't matter, because you don't go into someone's home as a guest, and then disrespect it completely by assaulting the residents. That's really low.

[JillianC]

Julia, it's never okay to touch someone without their permission.  I just had a similar situation occur to me about an hour ago.  I was at church of all places.  I attend a transgender support group at the same church and one of the members had brought his husband and a transwoman who was staying with extended family, to the group meeting.  At the meeting we only shook hands and things seemed fine.  However, today at church he greeted me and then put one hand on my shoulder and the other squarely in the middle of my chest.  Granted it was open palmed but it was still an inappropriate greeting. 

[Julia1996]

My dad got ahold of Steve this afternoon.  My parents just got home from a vacation so I hadn't told them about what happened with Steve. But my brother had told my father about it which I didn't know . So my dad calls me downstairs and there's Steve. I'm sure he totally didn't know my parents were home. He's standing there trying to act like everything is normal. He asked me if he could talk to me in private for a minute. My dad asked him if he wanted privacy so he could feel me up again.  He started stuttering and saying he had come to apologize to me and that he made a mistake and that he was sorry.  My dad said " so if I come over there and grab your dick and then say sorry then it's ok, right?" He didn't know what to say. Then my dad asked him if his parents knew he was gay. He started saying he wasn't gay and asked my dad why he would even think that. He said " well you told Tyler what you did to Julia wasn't assault because you don't consider her a real girl. So you must consider her a boy. So that means you touched a boy sexually.  So you must be gay." Steve started saying thats not what he meant but my dad said either way it was assault and that he didn't want a future sex offender hanging around his house and not to let him see him again. He also told him Tyler didn't want anything else to do with him either. So I guess thats the last of that asswipe I'll have to see.

[tgirlamg]

You've got some good folks in your life little sister!!!

[josie76]

GO DAD!!!

Well despite your other issues with how your dad may treat you, he loves you as his daughter.  That is a very good thing.

[KathyLauren]

Yay for your dad!!

[JMJW]

Good riddance. He's lucky to get away without charges being pressed. If he's smart he'll  leave it at that and never contact any of you again.

[elkie-t]

When I was younger (in school), and it was many years ago and in another country, when boys and girls became teenagers, many boys would want to grab a cis-girl and feel her up and touch her boobs when they thought they could get away with it.

So, I think his desire to feel you up wasn't because he thought you were trans. But his acting on his desires, might be caused by his thoughts that he would get away with it, because you're trans

[Gertrude]

My dad got ahold of Steve this afternoon.  My parents just got home from a vacation so I hadn't told them about what happened with Steve. But my brother had told my father about it which I didn't know . So my dad calls me downstairs and there's Steve. I'm sure he totally didn't know my parents were home. He's standing there trying to act like everything is normal. He asked me if he could talk to me in private for a minute. My dad asked him if he wanted privacy so he could feel me up again.  He started stuttering and saying he had come to apologize to me and that he made a mistake and that he was sorry.  My dad said " so if I come over there and grab your dick and then say sorry then it's ok, right?" He didn't know what to say. Then my dad asked him if his parents knew he was gay. He started saying he wasn't gay and asked my dad why he would even think that. He said " well you told Tyler what you did to Julia wasn't assault because you don't consider her a real girl. So you must consider her a boy. So that means you touched a boy sexually.  So you must be gay." Steve started saying thats not what he meant but my dad said either way it was assault and that he didn't want a future sex offender hanging around his house and not to let him see him again. He also told him Tyler didn't want anything else to do with him either. So I guess thats the last of that asswipe I'll have to see.

Good on your dad!


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[rose]

Hi everyone. Last night my brother's friend Steve was at our house.  He was waiting for Tyler  to get out of the shower. I looked up and he was staring at me like he usually does and then he asks me if my boobs are real or implants. I told him they were real. So then he comes over and grabs both of them and said they felt real. I slapped his hands away and told him to get the ##away from me. Then he wanted to see them! I got pissed off when he asked to see them and told him sure he could see them if I could see his dick.  That douche said "fair enough" and unzipped his jeans and started to take it out! I stopped him and told him I didn't want to see it and I was in the middle of telling him he was a pig and a perve when my brother walked in wanting to know what was going on. Steve said I was just being a baby. So I told my brother what he did. My brother was really not happy and asked Steve why the ##he thought it was ok to touch me like that. Then he asked him if he realized he could be charged with assault for touching a girl like that. He said of course he did. Then he said "but she's not REALLY a girl". So because I guess because I'm trans and not cis it's ok to touch me inappropriately.  My brother told me he wanted to speak to Steve alone. I don't know what he said but they were supposed to go out and Tyler ended up staying home. This isn't the first time this has happened. It's happened with females too. Ive had other girls reach out and grab my boobs. I told one girl I really didn't like that and she said to chill out that we were both girls and that girls do that with each other.They do? That makes it ok? I really don't care which sex the person is I don't like people putting their paws on me without permission. I've also had girls ask to see them. Since I was in boulder for a year and came back presenting as female a lot of people assume I've had SRS already. I had one girl ask me if she could see my V. I asked her why would she want to see it. She said she wanted to see how "real it looks". I've also had guys who know I'm trans ask me if I still had my dick.  I'm talking about guys I know casually not guys I'm going to have sex with. So I guess it's perfectly OK to touch me without permission and ask me really personal questions because I'm trans and not a REAL girl. Have any of you been treated like this?

You got the typical "what people think it's ok to do to trans girl "

It happens with me too guys asking me if my breast are real and if I have a dick touch me sexually forcefully without permission

And not considering me real girl etc

All the trans girls I know got this treatment too
But I live in place where there is no LGBT rights and trans girls can't do anything to defend themselves legally even in the case of rape

I was surprised to know this things happened to you

Glad your dad stand up for you

Your country have laws to protect you unlike mine next time someone do this to you
Told them to stop or you will take a legal act against them

It's your body and no one is allowed to treat you this way

[Martin Müller]

Because many People are stupid 😧😕

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[MeTony]

Wow! You have a great dad!

I hope this creep stays away from you from now on.

[JMJW]

What was he expecting? He goes into the house where a transgender woman lives, gropes her breasts and then says she's not a real girl. Was he expecting her to go "Yep, yep, you're right, I don't know what I was thinking. I'm just a silly man in a dress. Thanks for setting me straight. Here, you can grab me all you want now, cos I'm not a real girl that makes me open season. Have at it."

As mind boggling as it is, He never at any point stopped and thought hey, this is kind of a jerk thing to say and do isn't it. That thought never crossed his mind. This is sociopathic.

At some point you have to know you're being an unbelievable douchebag. The fact that he would even dare try to argue that he was taken out of context reveals he hasn't learned anything.   

[Jin]

Doesn't matter if you are REAL or not, it is still assault.

And if you think you are real, you are.

A quick knee in the 'nads or a punch in the nose works well for me.

[Gertrude]

A joint lock by grasping and bending the finger opposite it's normal flexion does wonders.


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