Self lubrication after all?

[Ruth Ruthless]

Heyas all! I'm 4.5 months post-op via my local Israeli sex change commitee and my vajayjay is absolutely glorious, I love how it looks and how it feels to touch it!

I was told not to expect self lubrication but when I put a finger inside it's always pleasant and lubricated, even a full day since my last dilation. (I know, I'm naughty, I need to do at least 2 a day but sometimes I do 1 especially long one)

It's really fun, though not sexual, for me to just stick a finger and leave it in there. Could I be self lubricating without colon grafts? Or is this a limited form of self lube one should normally expect to have suitable only for single fingers and not full blown penises? (lucky I'm more into women than men)

Main complaints:
- still haven't been able to feel sexually aroused at all post op but I have physical sensation on my clit and according to sticking my finger I feel all of my vagina too, including insides
- dilations take really really long for me to get them all the way in... I often spend 1-2 hours on each dilation until I can get the biggest one in

That's it. No complications remaining. Had granulation 1 month post op that has long since resolved and after 3 months post op I was able to be fully active again including sports, sitting, playing drums etc. with no pain except the really long dilations take so much of my day and don't leave much time to go places and get things done.

About the second issue:
- gynecologist member of surgery team checked and says I am contracting muscles though I don't feel that I am when I take the time to put it in slowly and she went in really fast so I couldn't help myself... she suggested physiotherapy for vaginismus but closest appointment is in December. Any resources online until then?
- A trans friend said I might be going too easy on myself with the dilations and I might need to try to shove it in as quick as I can bear to, so that the tissue heals more flexible.

Who do you think is right? The trans person who says I should push through the pain or the gynecologist or a combination of both? The gyno said I did a great job preserving the surgery result and she thinks it is just involuntary muscle contraction... but I can contract the muscles willingly and it doesn't feel like I'm doing that during dilation. Could she just be judging from her standpoint that she just immediately shoved in two fingers once she had gloves and lube on?

[Rachel]

There was a point in my first 3 months when dilation was painful. I was going along very well and then all the sudden dilation became painful. I was prescribed hydrocortisone cream and told to used it 2 times a day. It helped to stretch the scar tissue. I was dilating 5 times a day with #1-4 for 30 minutes. I dilated twice a day at work and had to get the dilation done. I remember tears getting #4 in. The cream helped or the tissue stretched or both nd it is not an issue any more.

[Dena]

Learn how to completely relax everything below the waist before you insert the dilator. Normally it takes me a couple of minutes to reach  full depth. The best way to do this is put a pile of pillows behind your back and bend at the waist. Your pelvis and legs should be lined up the same as when you are standing.  What is not helping is your irregular dilation schedule. At this point, if the doctor says 2 times a day, do two times a day. If it's still tight, do three times a day when you can. Only when you reach once a week, can you tolerate missing a dilation.

As for self lubrication, most of us do some as estradiol helps convert the skin to vaginal tissue. If your doctor prescribes estrogen cream, that will speed the process. You may not produce enough for sex but it's normal to produce some.

[Ruth Ruthless]

It might be a skin elasticity thing after all. Today I did my first really long dilation as usual, then I did another dilation 1.5 hours later, and another 2 hours later and these took me 15-30 minutes to get same depth. So I'm guessing this is a temporary phase I need to do a hella lot of dilations to make the skin heal elastic.