Don't know what to expect

[Larisa]

First not sure what to expect by telling Im transgender to a few more people at my job. Most of them I know it will be okay. It's one person there, one of the bosses who I deal with alot of the time. She Im not sure can deal with it well which is her problem but I dont know what her reaction would be.

She did something the other day that I found ignorant and she was out of line. Im tired of these gender expectations. I weigh as Ive said here before around 155 to 160 but my weight is more like a 135. She tried to have me lift a big box of copy paper and ya I have trouble lifting some of it. I tried to explain why but she was close minded about it just saying your an adult and you should be able to do it. This happened another time a few months back and I was told to go lift weights which is exactly what I dont want to do. She thinks cause she thinks Im a guy that I should be able to do all of this.

Im not sure how she will deal with it when she finds out shes been working with a girl all this time. Im wondering if maybe someone else should explain it to her instead. I was writing in a notebook a sort of letter so maybe should another read it and explain this to her. I know her attitude of trans people will not be thought of well where I work if she has a negative reaction.



 

[elkie-t]

If lifting boxes "up to a certain weight" is not part of your job requirements stating on the job offer and it's out of your capacity to easily do it, you shouldn't do it, boy or girl, period. Gender is irrelevant to physical ability to perform a task. I'd rather not out to the boss to just avoid heavy lifting, she won't believe you, unless you are ready to fully transition on the job (in which case, you should start not with her, but with HR department) _and_ it doesn't guarantee she won't be continuing to ask you to lift boxes even if you fully transition.

I'd suggest to go to an HR and say that you were told to lift weights above your capacity by one of senior managers and you strained your back last time you did it and if it happens again, you'd hate it but won't have any other way but to go to hospital at company's expense. Hopefully, HR would be able to pass a message to the manager that it's not appropriate without you being personally targeted.

[Charlie Nicki]

She sounds very ignorant and narrow minded. Is her opinion too important?

[JoanneB]

I believe in the US the OSHA "One Man Carry" weight limit is 40 lbs.  "Man" being a very ambiguous term these days... One person carry?

A box of paper comes close, for sure. Yet, I have to believe generally speaking, almost everyone in industry knows the rules and packages accordingly. Or, puts BIG Warning Labels in 3 languages and pictures that 2 people are needed or some other mechanical aide.

IF, you were expected to exceed the federal limits.... go to HR. Heck, go to HR anyway just out of general principle because of the "Man Bashing"  Just because you dangly bits you're supposed to be like SuperMan?

[elkie-t]

  I think the key here is weight. No person should be required to lift anything above 25% of their body weight.


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[Larisa]

Too weird!! She is quitting next week and Ill be gone next week so just the rest of this week of dealing with her. So happy!!!! I still do kind of want to tell some others there Im trans that I directly work with but as for her, thankfully she will be gone. I have a feeling still that if she knew, she might just go crazy about it. This was VERY good news to me!! It made things way easier for me!

[Jenny94]

Yeah, if you can't be arsed dealing with her lousy reaction upon finding out you're trans, just get someone else to tell her.  You don't have to waste your time on her.

L x