I've had two major clocked-out experiences (and a few minor) - the first major clock was when I was ordering some donuts at a Dunkin. Waiting in line I was called up 'next - miss, what would you like?' After placing my order the cashier (woman) screamed out - 'Oh my gawd - you're a dude?!?!?! That's a dude!!! I am so sorry, I thought you was [sic] a woman, but you a dude.' Of course by then, everyone in the store was staring at me. All the time they were getting my food, she kept on talking to herself or back to her crew - 'my gawd that's a dude, but he looks like a woman, damn'.
The second experience was also in another Coffee/donut shop (i like donuts!) - again - initially gendered as straight-up female ("miss"), placed my order, then while waiting, asked another employee for the bathroom door code. He initially gendered me as female, but after I asked for the code, gave me this confused, raised eyebrow look and said - they're being cleaned. You can't use them." [and nobody was cleaning them, and others were given the access codes earlier]
Both of these were in NYC - first experience with the woman was in East Village. I did notice the other customers staring and whispering - the female customers seemed to understand "what I was" and some made direct eye contact with me then threw some 'OMG side-eye at the cashier' [silent support - I'll take it]. Second experience was in Lower Manhattan. At no point did I feel physically threatened - at most, I felt excluded from the space but moved on. I just kind of shrugged off the negative juju - in a sense - taking them as compliments (?). I don't particularly dress like a stereotypic, magazine female (whatever that means) - no makeup, t-shirt and sweatpants rolled to my knee; messy, tragic hair shoved under a baseball cap...I perpetually look like I'm off to work-out or dance class. My voice is typical male baritone. Both those experiences I was tired and didn't even attempt a vocal shift. Most of the time (and have since avoided further confrontational clockings) - I just shift to an 'up too late screaming at the concert' raspy voice, and it seems to work well enough to avoid confrontation.
