Bathroom while waiting on docs

[ChristiVee]

Hi, I'm sorry if this is rambly or wordy, but I wanted to cover all the related information to begin with, so hopefully I can get the information/insight I need faster. 

I was waiting for a while before getting my ID documents changed, having the forms and stuff from my doctor sitting on the table for a while. I was specifically waiting until I "looked" and "sounded" more female with/without makeup, and until I worked on my voice more, so I'd have less harassment with restroom issues.

While I still feel my voice has a bit to go, others told me it sounded like it enough like a girl. I also know I've been getting ma'amed on the phone a bit. Where I live (Louisiana), and being initially from another state, I pretty much have to change my Birth Certificate, then bring it to DMV to get my license amended.

I sent the papers to have the BC amended, only to find out there is a 8-13 week wait(backed up) time on birth certificates there. In the meantime, I've been trying to "dress down" my features to cover them, but anything former where I am cleanshaven, or wear proper clothes (not a T-Shirt and small A-Shirt), I look female.

Worst of all, I was supposed to go to a comic convention this weekend, "coming out", and cosplaying a female character one day, and in my Jedi Garb the other. The first is a teaser cosplay for an attraction at another con next year, is thin/flowy vest with pretty much girly volleyball shorts we modified with trim. Shows my curves but still modest. The other is my Jedi outfit: Busty Corset with Vest, and a modest/flowy skirt).

In the first, I am not sure if I'd get "clocked", we've not seen how I look with the wig and makeup.
The second, the Jedi with corset, I was told there's no way I can be clocked as anything but female, even without makeup.

I already contacted the people who own the venue being rented out to find if the facility has any family restrooms, but they don't, nor do they know the closest one. My attorney said he doesn't think there is a law addressing restrooms, that it's by facility policy in general. He also said he can't say if I'd face any charges if facility manager called the police if someone who knew me DID report on me as being male on my ID. He recommended I open a case for them to research it, but I'm not sure I have the time for them to fulfill the case.

I have not asked the people RUNNING the convention on their policy, so if it's deemed better to use the female restroom, I wasn't already told "not to".

So, I was wondering if anyone had an experience or knowledge of how to approach the situation?
I either have to dress in something else (not cosplay, in which case I may as well not go), or I need to know if anyone has faced anything other than people griping about about you using the female restroom? I feel it would be unsafe for me to use the male restroom with how I'll be dressed, especially the second day: The first being modest but showing leg, the other makes me look like I'm a 34D cup....

Thanks for any help

[Tammy Jade]

If ur presenting as female use the  women's. Simple as that.

Most women get in and get out and avoid eye contact in my experience.

If ur passable which it sounds like u are, it's probably going to be a non issue.

I'm not passable and started using the women's before I got my documents and didn't have any issues. Tho I am from Australia.

Edit: using the men's while presenting as a woman is not generally a good option & it's better to run the risk of being called out then being in the men's.

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[elkie-t]

It is generally easier to get forgiveness after the fact than permission before the act. You can choose either restroom but I would advise to use female room if you are a MTF. I doubt it would be any issue if your behavior is proper (mind your own business)


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[KathyLauren]

If ur presenting as female use the  women's. Simple as that.

I agree.  I started using the women's washroom long before HRT started working its magic.  There was no way that I was going to go into the men's wearing a skirt.

My documents show my correct name, but not my correct gender.  My birth certificate can't be changed until I have lived full-time for two years, and I can't change the gender on any other documents without the BC.  So my ID shows my current photo, 'Kathleen Lauren xxxx' and a great big 'M'!     Oh well.

TBH, it doesn't really bother me that much.  It's not my fault that bureaucracies are stupid.  Few people ask to see my documents anyway.  I am accepted everywhere as a woman, and I have never been challenged in a bathroom.  On the other hand, I do not intend to cross the border until I at least have my birth certificate and other documents updated to show my correct gender.