A small step in a direction.?

[Sno]

Well, it's time, in part for a little disclosure.

I've been fast tracked to a limited amount of therapy to help with my anxiety issues (my last little panic attack lasted 2 weeks), and obviously I will need to talk my trans status through, without trying to sidetrack the main objective (helping me get better at dealing with how I feel).

So how did you come out to your therapists?

It feels so daunting as they will be the first folk in the world apart from my partner to know, it will be put on my medical notes, and surprise, I'm quietly panicking... please be gentle.

Rowan

[Laurie]

Hi Rowan

  It's been a little while since I've seen your user ID around here but it is good to see you back. As for your question I didn't have to "come out" to my therapist. I got him via referral so he knew what I was there for. So I cannot help you with the How part. I can say that you should be open and honest as you can be so they have the information they need to be able to help you. That is what I did and what I continue to do. I have several issues I hope he can help me with but anxiety is not one of them. Close but no cigar.
  The part about record entries I'll admit did give me a bit of anxiety initially but I quickly got over it. I want that sort of information in my record so any medical provider knows who and what I am so they can treat me accordingly.

Good luck with your sessions and get the problems resolved quickly.

Hugs,
   Laurie

[LizK]

For me it was my Dr in order to get a referral to a gender therapist or at least someone who specialises in that stuff. I was really nervous but in the end my need to get help was greater than my anxiety. I think after I told my first Dr it was nerve wracking but the world kept spinning and my life kept going and has got better with each step.

Think about what you want to talk about and make a note to take with you if there is something really important to you. These people are professionals and will be fine.

I hope it goes really well for you, I am sure it will

[Sno]

Hi Laurie,

I'm around each day, but trying desperately to manage my time better... my anxiety has curtailed a lot of things, because I'm getting anxious about everything and trying to not offend folk - such is the joy of life in the middle, I can offend all sides, all of the times... :#

The easiest way for me to manage that in part is by saying little, and getting out more.

It is in part helping (as is the medication, now that I've stopped the shakes, and the morning fog), and I'm hoping that I'll be able to reduce my frequency of harming again - I had a really long spell where things were good, to get back to a similar place I need the help.

Thanks Elizabeth for the tips

Hugs

Rowan

[Laurie]

Hi again Rowan,

  I'm sorry you have been having such a rough time of it and I am glad that you have gotten something that is helping with the self abuse. That is never good. I hope it is a thing of the past for you.
  That said I have also been going through a rough time and have been fast tracked VA style (it's been 2 weeks of waiting so far) to see a psychiatrist for possible medication myself. I think I've moved on to a numb stage. At least the crying has stopped.
  But I am glad to see you posting a bit like I said before and I'm also glad you are getting help. Be open and honest as it will serve you best.

Hugs,
  Laurie

[JoanneB]

BLURT
Just spit it out and get it over with. BTW-The Earth is NOT going to swallow you up, and no meteor is going to land squarely on your head. No lightning bolt out of clear blue sky will smoke you. And just maybe... The therapist will not run off screaming into the night 

That was the high anxiety, deep in my shell, shy, loaner person did.  What may have helped a little was I wasn't there directly about the trans stuff.

[Sno]

Well, it was more of a well, we're going there, or not, oh sod it moment. More of a blurt than anything else, but it's now done.

The rest of the session was, uh, interesting. I think it may have been the first time she has ever been stumped - to the extent of trying to work out next steps for these sessions, and then what next.

So now I wait, and do my homework

Rowan

[Cindy]

Well done Rowan. That was brave of you and I am so happy for you.

As far as your therapist goes maybe it is time to print off or give her a link to the WPATH standards of care so she knows what to do?

[Sno]

Hi Cindy,

The challenge for her, is not the gender stuff - it's all of the other baggage. I started these sessions in full disclosure mode, so she now knows about the harming, what have transpired to be sexual assaults, my younger life, and more.

My feeling is that she's surprised that I'm still here. And now it sounds like she's going to try to get me further help.

A positive outcome from a challenging day..

Rowan

[Laurie]

Rowan,

  Just remember, in addition to your therapy and medications we are here for you to talk to 24/7. There is always someone here to listen if you have a need for it. You are welcome to PM me if you need to. I know others here are ready and willing to help also. I'm not sure what help I can be to you as I deal with my own issues but I encourage you to reach out when you need to. Self harm is never a solution to problems nor is other self defeating actions. Now if I can only remember this myself when I'm  having my own crisis' lol. Things hurt and we do need the help of professionals and friends to get past them. But they can be overcome.

Hugs,
   Laurie

[Sno]

(Hugs)

Laurie, you're so generous, it's really appreciated.

Rowan

[Sno]

Long chat with my lovely partner today, and she reminded me that I've been out to her for over 20 years. It was a lovely conversation, she's fabulous.

I just need to find me.

Rowan

[Tessa James]

How wonderful to have a supportive partner.  Mine reminded me that she had known for 30 years and challenged me to get into therapy.  She also reminded me of years of crossdressing that i had somehow forgotten about.  Denial and repression can be powerful.

When i first started one to one on my coming out journey I cried like a baby and felt horrible self consciousness.  That was 5 years ago and now i am giving trans and LGBTQ presentations to groups of people regularly.

It truly can and does get better.

[Sno]

Oh Tessa,
it's not taking much at the moment to set me off, somehow my eyes are leaking after reading your reply...

Folk are so kind and thoughtful.


Rowan

[Tessa James]

Oh Tessa,
it's not taking much at the moment to set me off, somehow my eyes are leaking after reading your reply...

Folk are so kind and thoughtful.


Rowan

And you are part of this kind and thoughtful family.  I love your evocative poetry that bespeaks a sensitive soul.  With that heart it seems you have a promising future in sharing the love your obviously feel.  We can cheer you on and fully anticipate your arrival at a place of greater self confidence and self acceptance.  Small steps are milestones, just don't step in it   Big hugs!