Quote from: KathyLauren on November 12, 2018, 07:35:52 AM
I am sorry that the depression is still getting you. I admire your strength in looking for the positive.
Thank you, I really am trying to stay upbeat and positive .. I fail (flail?) a lot still ....
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But I don't think you should "shut up" when the going gets tough.
Hey now, be nice! OH, I'm the one that said Shut Up .. nevermind ..
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No "sort of" about it, Faith. He saw a woman he thought he recognized. Period.
I know, I know. Keep repeating it, someday it might sink in the rest of the way.
Had an odd moment today and almost depressed myself. We all know that not only do others need to learn to gender us correctly, we need to learn to do it for ourselves as well. I've gotten to the point where I avoid self-pronouns in my head and sometimes use the right ones. Today, I'll not describe the why (unless you ask
) but my response to Lori was, "Hey now, don't do that. They'll blame me" and in my head I said, "They always blame the guy". ARRGGGHH .. I wanted to yell at myself .. in fact, I did *
sigh*
I got an email from the therapist asking if I could reschedule my appointment .. to today. Yuppers. So I clocked out early, got home, met with Lori (she was off today), primped a little more and away we went.
It went OK but not as well as I'd hoped. She said she never received my email of the stuff I wanted her to peruse to help with the session. That blew a whole lot of the reason for going right out the window. There was way too much to cover in one hour without prior information. I know her time is valuable but reading it is much faster then describing it.
I covered what I could. It was religion based and she admitted straight up about being personally biased. I knew that, that was the reason I wanted her input. She treats and supports trans clients despite it being against her beliefs. Oh well, maybe in another 6 months.
We did cover some of the GD/BD issues, etc, etc. Overall, I think I could have saved the fee and just talked to Lori some more. Although, I think some of what I said sunk in and solidified a bit more for Lori as I talked to the therapist about it even though I didn't recount anything that Lori hadn't heard before, multiple times.
After that, we retail therapy'ed a bit, treated ourselves to dinner, went grocery shopping. Multitudes of smile, friendly smiley conversation, a few ladies and sweeties. Yes, I was in a good mood this afternoon and still am.
I don't know if it was leaving work early, spending another day with Lori, partly the therapist, the shopping and so on or all of the above. I know I feel a lot better when Lori is around.
There's more I could fill in about the therapist visit. Time for a walk, no time to type. You'll have to wonder and imagine and make up your own stories.
Faith