Transitioning without transitioning. Any advice?

[aka.Jade]

I am a 17yr old. I'm not sure whether I'm genderfluid or want to transition without transitioning. All I know is I'm an mtf.

Anyway, I'm looking for some tips, advice, or things I can do, to make myself look more female facially. I look fairly feminine anyway, but would like to look more. Any advice?

Nicolas/Jade

[Dena]

Welcome to Susan's Place. Your options are somewhat limited without medical intervention however you can thin your eyebrows, use makeup and experiment with hair. When you have money, you might consider facial hair removal if it's a problem because once you can stop shaving, you will develop fine feminine facial hair. Female impersonators have shown it possible to drastically alter your appearance just using the standard tools available to a CIS woman however it will take some time to develop the skills needed to pull it all together.

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[AnonyMs]

Have a look at Leigh Dorei's channel in YouTube. I'm not suggesting you get surgery, but it might be of interest as I don't think Leigh is on HRT or binary trans.

https://www.youtube.com/user/LeighbyTM/videos

[hanniesipma]

I'm curious as to exactly what you mean by "transition without transitioning." Transition is composed of different elements for different people, and not everybody cares about the same things. In the end, the primary goal is to make your life better, and there's no single recipe for how to do that.

When you say "transition without transitioning"... do you mean no surgery? No hormones? No name change? No hair removal? No women's clothing? No femme clothing (not quite the same thing)? No voice training?

I don't like to give pat answers to difficult questions, but I can't really avoid it here: the simple answer to how to transition while avoiding some particular aspect of transition that you don't think is going to make your life better is... to not do that thing.

Now there's a completely different question here, too, of course—and important question, but a separate one: how are you going to get other people to go along with you?

That's not something anyone can help you with without knowing more about your personal circumstances. Maybe, JUST AS AN EXAMPLE, you want HRT and you live in a place where healthcare providers are suspicious of nonbinary trans people or trans people who don't want surgery or trans people attempting a "boy mode transition" or butch trans women or any other subset of people whose lives would be surely made better by HRT but who don't fit whatever stereotype. Narrow minded healthcare providers have been a recurring problem for trans people for decades and there's TONS of folks here who can help you deal with them. But that's going to require more specific questions.

[aka.Jade]

Hi Hanniesipma

I mean changing without hormones and surgery, as in naturally gradually turning into the new me by just changing my appearance.

[Devlyn]

I just started presenting as a woman and got a name change long before seeking out a physicians help. The name of this game is "I'll Do What I Want" 

Hugs, Devlyn

[aka.Jade]

Hi Devlyn Marie,

Great advice! 

Nicolas/Jade

[Julia1996]

Hi, I'm Julia.  Welcome to the forum. You have 2 options. 1. If you want to look like a female without medical intervention you can use all the tricks drag queens use to look like women. There are lots of tutorials on YouTube on drag makeup and shading/contouring. Then you use breast forms and padding to give your body a female shape under your clothes. I work with a guy who does drag. He's a big very masculine looking guy. But with his makeup he actually looks like a pretty woman. The thing with this is it really only works at night. The drag makeup is so heavy that it doesn't work in daylight. He's can't go to the store in drag and pass as a woman.

2. If you want to feel more feminine without doing very obvious things, by that I mean you Don't want it to be overly obvious to everyone, you can go for a more androgynous look. Start with how you dress.

Start wearing clothes that are unisex rather than male. Wear boots and shoes that could go either way too.

Clean up your eyebrows a little bit and get rid of any unibrow if you have one. If you don't know how to do this yourself have it done at a salon. If your'e presenting male the stylist won't give you a female arch unless you ask for it.

Use clear mascara on your lashes. It will define your lashes but it's clear so you won't have to worry about being called out for black smudges under your eyes.

Use tinted lip balm.  Lip smackers by bonnie bell makes some good ones with a very light tint. If anyone notices just say its lip balm . It's winter so lots of people use lip balm.

Grow your hair out and have it cut in a style that works for both male and female.

Use cuticle remover on your cuticles and file your nails instead of clipping them. You can use clear polish. If people notice it say it's bitter apple polish to keep you from biting your nails. If you have hairy hands/knuckles shave or wax them.

If you feel comfortable doing it shave your legs. And definitely shave your underarms.

Use fruit scented body spray and lotions. Vanilla for example smells a bit feminine but vanilla itself isn't exclusively female.

YouTube has voice tutorials for transwomen. You could start doing voice exercises in private and once you start getting a little progress gradually add it into your normal way of speaking.

If you think there is a possibility you will want to transition later I suggest a testosterone blocker. It won't cause any changes but it will prevent testosterone from making you more masculine. With the blocker if you decide to transition later the hrt effects will be much better.  The effects of the blocker aren't permanent so all you have to do is stop taking it if you decide not to transition.

I hope some of this helps. Good luck.