Hi there!!

[Tria]

Well hell there,
I am new to the site so, a little about me.
I am extremely questioning my biological gender and looking for somewhere I can openly discuss my situation.
So history, when I was 8 I was sexually assaulted by a cousin, at 9 I started dressing in my moms clothes ( over 30+ years) off and on since then.  I throw or give it all away saying I am done and will be happy as I am but it doesn't stay away. 
There are a few very select people that know about me dressing and are supportive, I am very afraid to say anything to my family (very catholic European upbringing)
I guess I am feeling confused, I feel much better when I am dressed and my friends say they can see a change come over me when I dress as welll, that I am more at ease and calm.
I am currently looking for therapist in my area I would welcome any advice anyone could offer?
I am also worried as being a large male to transition into a larger female.  I have gone out fully dressed and I received a lot of looks and one supportive comment while out.
I am just....
I don't know
Sorry for rambling

[MaryT]

Hi Tria.

No, it doesn't stay away. 

Your childhood trauma and your search for your true self have been shared by others on Susan's Place, so you will find genuine sympathy here.   I also think that someone will be able to help you find a therapist in your area.

[Megan.]

Hi Tria,  welcome [emoji5].

Reaching out to a therapist would be a very wise move, you'll have alot of thoughts to talk through about you own identity and what happened to you.

As far as rambling,  you don't compare to many here including myself! If it helps you to share your thoughts,  then we're here to listen.

This is a process that can be broken into small steps.  With each one you can test the water and see if it works for you or not.

Good luck with everything. X

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

[Shambles]

Hiya tria

Couple of things spring to mind when I read your post 1 I would definitely speak that theropest. What happened to you might be linked to your current feelings. Even if how you feel does not change it might get you some closure on the matter. A 2. On a more lighter note I will call big chap to big gal I am big myself and I fell the same. If I went out in women's clothes no matter how unisex they were it would be more obvious than well something very obvious as I cant think of sometingetting funny to put ( I may edit later lol ). I'm doing something about it. Set about goal and just think of what I'll mean when not if you do It. So far.lost 20 lb and would be hapaying to try and help you along

[Tria]

Hi Shambles,
That would be awesome, and I very much appreciate it!  I am looking at taking about 40 pounds off and am doing cardio!  Part of the issue is I am 6'5" tall before heels or boots but every bit helps! Can I pm you to ask more about how you have achieved it?
Thanks

[Shambles]

I don't think you can pm here straight away. I need to loose alot more but certain foods are your freinds.  Ill try to pm u

[Tria]

You are so right! I can't even reply to you yet!
I did receive your message and thank you for that! 
I am 22 stone (in your measurements!)  I would love to get under 19 do to my frame I am not sure if I can take it lower and be healthy.
Onwards and downwards!
Oh I did find a therapist that has availability just waiting to here back for an appointment!
Thanks

[V M]

Hi Tria 

Welcome to Susan's Place    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that we offer to all new members to help them along

Things that you should read

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
Reputation rules	Cautionary Note	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy

Hugs

V M