Dena, usually the best could be self taught, more practical rather than theorizing. A practical observation is usually the most realistic. Too many people get wrapped up into jumping to conclusions based on speculation rather than practical examination or book smarts rather than experience. If that therapist said you were "too masculine", she was judging based on physical appearance and ignoring that transitioning could fix most of that and ignoring the inner depths of your soul and your female brain. You look like a woman to me in your avatar picture, so i wouldnt let what that therapist said get to you or distract you from who you really are.
Really Dena, a therapist should not say that to a trans woman, that is extremely disrespectful which is why i'm sort of cautious about who i speak to so that i dont get hurt because even if you are masculine and say you look completely manly without an ounce or shred of feminine features to your physique transitioning especially nowadays can fix all the damage of masculinity has done to a transgender woman. There are trans women who look like cis women and even look more beautiful and feminine than cis women. I prefer a therapist who has captured the interest of how i feel who i truly am and that has soaked up scientific and medical knowledge about transgenders, not a therapist that is biased in any way like the therapist you mentioned. In a setting where there is bias, there is no hope for moving forward with getting the help and guidance i need. I need one that is completely cooperative and supportive. If the therapist wouldnt say a cis gender woman is masculine than they shouldnt say a trans woman is masculine either, especially to say that you have no hope of transitioning because you're too manly. That obviously is not true.
There are bigots who say we are not real women but they are ignorant and then there are those who say its a sin or disgusting to be transgender or gay which i go over how its not in this thread:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,231230.0.html I'm hoping my insurance plan covers some of the transitioning i will go through, if not i'll need to keep saving my money but i will not have to do everything and you dont have to pay in one lump sum all the money. It can be paid gradually over time per week or month just like many other medical costs. I know some insurance plans are better depending on the state you live in the US. In more conservative states, its different i think. When did you transition anyway? I was born in 1988.
Laurie i really would make my picture my avatar but most people dont put their pre transitioned picture as an avatar because it reminds them what they used to look like which we hate. I even hate looking at myself in a mirror because i know the person starring back at me in the reflection is not who i am. It triggers a dysphoric attack. I dont want to be reminded of how i look now compared to how i will look after transitioning. Fortunately i wont need a complete makeover even though i would like to get one because trans women who transition fully many people see them as if they were cis gender and couldnt ever tell what they used to be. I dont mind people considering me trans as long as the men i date arent bigoted. I know lots of guys who love trans women as much as cis women, if the trans woman is "hot" and sexy and that's what i want to be but moreover so i can live as a genuine person being the woman i should have been assigned as at birth but that didnt happen especially in 1988 with limited ways of doctors being able to look at the brain and your hormones besides other things that steers one in the direction of being transgender. The doctor just said "oh there's a penis, so male" pretty much...and i'm glad SRS exists now but that will probably come last in my transitioning process but it's not completely necessary even though i want to do it. I dont want my penis to be honest, a cis woman doesnt have one unless they are intersex so why should i but since i'm bisexual it would severely limit my sex with cis women a good bit but there is more than just penetration and intercourse which made me feel awkward to begin with as i always felt i should never had a penis and i rarely ever masturbated.
