Hello Linda, welcome to Susan's!
I am MtF in Seattle, visited Sydney a few times - awesome city. Glad to hear your wife has been helpful, and I am hoping there are ways for her to understand so this doesn't cause her any additional pain. What I've gained here is information from people in all stages of transition, relating experiences good and bad - and by interacting we help additional people faced with the same questions and decisions. One thing I'll suggest is your wife may want to check out the
Significant Others board on Susan's. It's a huge help to realise we are not alone, and Significant Others are also not alone.
If you have access to a therapist or counselor and haven't already seen one, they may also be able to help considerably - for your own path, and also to help your wife. A meeting with both of you and a counselor is the opposite of nights out without her knowledge - getting everything out on the table and coming up with a good plan for the future.
Glad you're here!
Kendra
