i have a question

[Christy Lee]

Im just wondering what kind of things do you do to appear more manly then you seemed, before starting to transition

- instead of crying i brood, i can be quite the brooder actually

- im the silent type..... most of the time

- i swear quite abit

- one thing i dont have to fake is my enjoyment of red meat, i love to stuff myself with red meat, that wont change...

- i did enjoy working out quite abit before, so i have big long arms which makes me feel manly i guess idk, i do like having long arms, but idk if i like feeling manly about it, but it helps if im needed for heavy lifting (another thing i dont like to do)

[Jailyn]

this is a good question. Things I feel are more manly now are arm hair, not being emotional at all, and grilling. I don't like my large shoulders but, have noticed that some women have broad shoulders too. You could say some of my perspectives on what's male vs. female has shifted some. I used to think liking sports was totally a guy thing and now I see there are plenty of women that like them. Along with what color of clothing you wear. We are socialized to think some colors are only for women and all others are for men. I am finding this not to be true. So things I thought were manly before don't seem as manly if you will.

[Laurie]

  I was a nerd and by being a nerd I didn't have to be very manly. Something I probably never really was anyway. I did try to keep my feelings in but they did get hurt and the the other thing I tried to hide started leaking from my eyes. I was also insecure, angry, unhappy, an ass particularly to my family. I was a drug abuser and an alcoholic. I see none of those as manly but it was how I was  as a man.  A failure.

[KathyLauren]

When I was trying to be manly, I joined the air force.  Learned to be a pottymouth while I was in.  After I got out, I grew a beard: great camouflage, and besides a girl shouldn't have to shave. 

Like you, I was the silent type, but it wasn't so much that I was trying to be manly.  It was my strategy to cover up the fact that I was continually going "WTF??" at male culture.  I couldn't figure it out at all, so I put into practice the old adage, "Better to be quiet and be thought a fool than to speak up and remove all doubt."

[Devlyn]

  I was a nerd and by being a nerd I didn't have to be very manly. Something I probably never really was anyway. I did try to keep my feelings in but they did get hurt and the the other thing I tried to hide started leaking from my eyes. I was also insecure, angry, unhappy, an ass particularly to my family. I was a drug abuser and an alcoholic. I see none of those as manly but it was how I was  as a man.  A failure.

Ouch, no! Never say that about yourself. You were a man learning what you needed to know.

Hugs, Devlyn

[Jessica_Rose]

I was also insecure, angry, unhappy, an ass particularly to my family. I was a drug abuser and an alcoholic. I see none of those as manly but it was how I was  as a man.  A failure.

I'm not sure who originated this quote, but I have been using it since 1989. The references I found attribute it to Carroll Bryant:

"Everyone in life has a purpose, even if it's to serve as a bad example"

I have never considered myself to be a bad person or a failure. However, once I began transitioning I was able to look back at my life and find innumerable occasions where I was a truly bad example. Please consider that sometimes being a bad example may inspire others not to follow in you footsteps. So depending on your point of view, being a bad example may actually have helped others. In my opinion anyone who has helped someone else choose a better path is not a failure, even if they are just a good example of poor behavior others can learn from.

[Christy Lee]

 

this is a good question. Things I feel are more manly now are arm hair, not being emotional at all, and grilling. I don't like my large shoulders but, have noticed that some women have broad shoulders too. You could say some of my perspectives on what's male vs. female has shifted some. I used to think liking sports was totally a guy thing and now I see there are plenty of women that like them. Along with what color of clothing you wear. We are socialized to think some colors are only for women and all others are for men. I am finding this not to be true. So things I thought were manly before don't seem as manly if you will.

Ive never thought about transitioning before, i always thought ok just be a man (which i hate), so ive never really stopped and looked at what body part causes me the most dysphoria, atm i think its my neck and face, ive sort of looked at myself at times, and thought see that guy (in the mirror) i wouldnt want to mess with him and ive always hated that about myself im not a fighter ive never been in a fight in my life and that will never change...... but that feeling, it made me feel gross and disgusting i guess, ive also hated whats expected of being born male, oh your a man can you just lift this really heavy thing for me omg...... or you must let women go first (always irked me im like why???  that should include me)

Another thing bothers me to, my favorite color is Pink i just love  pink it speaks to me, but because i feel like guys shouldnt like that color i just tell everyone Blue is my favorite color .....  or ill usually just dress in black clothes (im not an emo) i just like wearing black

  I was a nerd and by being a nerd I didn't have to be very manly. Something I probably never really was anyway. I did try to keep my feelings in but they did get hurt and the the other thing I tried to hide started leaking from my eyes. I was also insecure, angry, unhappy, an ass particularly to my family. I was a drug abuser and an alcoholic. I see none of those as manly but it was how I was  as a man.  A failure.

Im a geek but im a nerdy geek which means whatever i like i end up completely emersing myself in that world or whatever im doing that i like, intense to the point of getting carried away with it, i dont have an addictive personality ive never liked drugs or alchahol ive always liked being in control of myself which is why it took until now to start even wanting to think about transitioning.... too in control of myself

but yes however im mostly nice, but i dont get on with my family (save for my mum) however ive always felt like thats more on them then it is me, but i also see myself as a failure of a man.... but we should both try not think about it

When I was trying to be manly, I joined the air force.  Learned to be a pottymouth while I was in.  After I got out, I grew a beard: great camouflage, and besides a girl shouldn't have to shave. 

Like you, I was the silent type, but it wasn't so much that I was trying to be manly.  It was my strategy to cover up the fact that I was continually going "WTF??" at male culture.  I couldn't figure it out at all, so I put into practice the old adage, "Better to be quiet and be thought a fool than to speak up and remove all doubt."

I learned in school have a pottymouth, it sort of made me feel more manly having a pottymouth, however now it just feels like a part of my  personality

ive never done anything like join the air force, my girl voice won out here, although in my life ive sort of always tried to be as Androgynous as possible not too manly, not really girly, just me, ive never let myself explore my femininity but at the same time, i never really done anything too manly either... i do like to grow out a beard alot which is one of the things that makes me feel like how everyone sees me, but i also hate shaving so its an excuse not to shave

I think for me actually now that you say that, yes it is part of my manly persona but i think it was also me going WTF, at certain things CIS guys just take for granted, like ive known people who are perfectly comfortable peeing on a tree in public or atleast out of view, ive never done that and my inner voice has gone EEWW wtf NOO that is soo gross..... i cant even

Fake it until you make it has always been what ive tried to do..... but its so taxing 

[Natsuki Kuga]

Im just wondering what kind of things do you do to appear more manly...

Farting. Definitely farting. The more inappropriately, the better.

"Pull my finger" will get you far, grasshopper.

[emoji16]

[Cassi]

Farting. Definitely farting. The more inappropriately, the better.

"Pull my finger" will get you far, grasshopper.

[emoji16]

Please do not refer to "Farting".  Years ago I discovered that certain "fried" items tend to result in flatulence in me.  And always looking for a positive view of such a deal I discovered that when I would get in trouble at work and have to attend a meeting, I'd eat a philly steak sandwich loaded with fried onions.  Once in the meeting I would stealthfully release wee bits of flatulence resulting in a quick and no event meeting.

[Bari Jo]

I used to really go overboard with eating.  Joey chestnut and the black widow were my heroes.  As such I gained weight.  Then I would do gladiator training to lose it.  Both activities made me seem manly to friends and coworkers.  I always hated it, and myself after doing both.  Now though, I am sensible in my diet and work out only to slim the figure.

Bari Jo