Quote from: DawnOday on January 18, 2018, 11:25:35 AM
I don't recall seeing anyone here, admit they are transitioning because they want to. But I have seen many testaments that the feeling of being different began with "I realized at five or six"
People tell the stories that suit them best. There is plausible gain to saying "I was born this way", because only a monster blames an infant, but adults are frequently stigmatized for gender variance. Might there not be some pressure to assert a congenital condition?
None of us know how we felt at birth. Few of us remember anything more than a concrete event (e.g. "the birthday party where Susie cut her lip") before six. We certainly don't have clean recollection of our emotional state at that point, nor of what we had resolved. Most six year olds haven't resolved much of anything--they just do what they are told, including wearing whatever clothes that mom laid out on the bed.
If someone says they clearly recall that they were "in the wrong body"--which itself is nothing more than a metaphor--I am inclined to believe them, or at least convey to them an affirmation that they are in charge of their autobiography. Nevertheless, it is puzzling to me why so many of us:
1. Are well into adulthood before we connect the dots.
2. Describe years of struggle with guilt.
3. Thrived, at least in the opinion of those who observed us, in the wrong gender role.
4. Benefit from counseling.
5. Gradually become open to a broader array of treatment options.
All of this fits better *(in my opinion) in the framework of an evolutionary process than a birth event. Simply saying "born this way, but in denial" is so vague and unchallengeable that it begins to sound more like an excuse and less like an explanation. What cannot be falsified cannot be proven. I prefer to say "I don't know" when I don't. I do not believe that my human dignity depends on my identical being pre-ordained or devoid of any choice whatsoever. All I know is that by the time I was old enough to chart my own course, I already felt helpless to do anything whatsoever about the conviction that I was, or at least ought to, be female, and that everything I tried just made me neurotic and miserable.
