How I want to be seen ....

[Faith]

... at least for now. Slightly humorous, slightly serious. And it all may change next week, next month ...

I tell my wife, I just want to look good. If I wear mens clothes, look good. If I wear women's clothes, look good. I don't ever want to look ridiculous. It may be an old, instilled in youth, concept but I never want to look like a 'guy in a dress', you know? It's an outdated way of thinking, I know. It's in my head what can I say.  That's not to say I care if I see someone else that way, only on myself. (someday I hope that it's all purged from my brain)

today at work I heard a good comment/story regarding me (posted in the 'made me happy' topic.  So, I was talking to a co-worker (the one that was brave enough to ask me about my makeup) about it. It got me thinking and I told him:

"I may never pass, I think for now that I'm ok if I never pass close up. What I want is to have some stereotypical redneck 4-wheel drive macho man get all worked up as he drives closer to me only to get all bent out of shape when he realizes last second that S*** I just got turned on by a dude."

For me, it would confirm that I look good. My outfit, walk, etc. is all working. I may never know it happened as they speed off, I just want it to be possible.

The serious part, bad things can happen if you piss of a hulking close-minded redneck. There are a lot of them around here where I live.

sorry if I said anything offensive to some, not my intent.

[KathyLauren]

What I want is to have some stereotypical redneck 4-wheel drive macho man get all worked up as he drives closer to me only to get all bent out of shape when he realizes last second that S*** I just got turned on by a dude."

I think that gets filed under "fun to imagine, but in real life..." 

I agree with you that being comfortable in your presentation is more important than passing.  My goal is to present the way my mother would have: as a lady with a bit of class, without being ostentatious.  I will feel good about myself, and that in turn will make me self-confident.  If that message is getting across, I will get gendered correctly and I will be happy.

[Jayne01]

Hi Faith,
I think the hardest thing to accomplish out of what you have just said is to simply not care what anybody else thinks. Figuring out how to look in a mirror and be happy with what you see, whichever way you have chosen to present that day is what we all are trying to achieve. If your chosen presentation causes some redneck to squirm in his 4wd, then that just makes for an interesting story. Do you really want a small minded, macho redneck to be the one to decide whether or not you look good?

Jayne

[Faith]

I think that gets filed under "fun to imagine, but in real life..." 

I agree with you that being comfortable in your presentation is more important than passing.  My goal is to present the way my mother would have: as a lady with a bit of class, without being ostentatious.  I will feel good about myself, and that in turn will make me self-confident.  If that message is getting across, I will get gendered correctly and I will be happy.

summed up nicely

...Do you really want a small minded, macho redneck to be the one to decide whether or not you look good?

Not really, more that I'd be happy that I made his small mind squirm. Ultimately, I have to decide what makes me look good .. that's the serious side.