Today, I got my first haircut as a woman, from a wonderful stylist who actually figured out something to do with my hair (hint to potential transwomen: don't buzz cut your hair just before you decide to transition!)
I didn't expect it to be an emotional, almost spiritual, experience.
I mean, I've been on HRT for some time. That was a big deal, the emotional changes are absolutely amazing, and I love what estrogen does to this body. I've been getting hair removed, which is also awesome. I put some holes in my ears. I lost a ton of weight. Etc. So I kind of thought I had figured out this whole body change thing. That's why it caught me off guard today when I got my hair cut.
It feels like my body is *mine* finally, and I *really* like the woman on the other side of the mirror. It's not just that I like the hair style, which I do. It is that it represents so much more, so much ownership in my life, so much finally giving myself permission to live for me, not for everyone else.
I was a nervous wreck today - my wife had to drive me (that's really unusual), and I was just overall freaking out with the idea that, finally, I was making a decision about who I am to the world. That's empowering as heck.
