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Do I care about this person?

Started by BJ0909, January 30, 2018, 11:52:14 PM

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BJ0909

January 30, 2018, 11:52:14 PM
I have this person in my life. Lately he and I have not been talking and not been friends. But anytime he walks by I get this feeling he will atleast say hi...but he ignores me...and honestly I dont blame him. I am the one who pushed him away. I am the one who is not capable of caring about him. And yet lately all I have done is cry....cry when he does not talk to me.....cry by myself.....and at this point.....IDK what to believe anymore......everyone in my life including him says I love him. If this is the case, why wont my heart let me feel it? I just want to have some sanity back in my life and love and care about people. He was the one person who was always so good to me. He always smiled at me. He always looked at me. He would be a dork and mess with me. Why is my heart being this way?
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SueNZ

#1
January 31, 2018, 03:30:17 AM
Quote from: BJ0909 on January 30, 2018, 11:52:14 PM
I have this person in my life. Lately he and I have not been talking and not been friends. But anytime he walks by I get this feeling he will atleast say hi...but he ignores me...and honestly I dont blame him. I am the one who pushed him away. I am the one who is not capable of caring about him. And yet lately all I have done is cry....cry when he does not talk to me.....cry by myself.....and at this point.....IDK what to believe anymore......everyone in my life including him says I love him. If this is the case, why wont my heart let me feel it? I just want to have some sanity back in my life and love and care about people. He was the one person who was always so good to me. He always smiled at me. He always looked at me. He would be a dork and mess with me. Why is my heart being this way?
Why not just ask. Sometimes we put up walls that just aren't there. Start a conversation and be true. We all put up walls, me included. When you need someone's love/acceptance then please ask. If he will only be your friend then what is wrong with that? 


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Treat life's difficult times as if they are normal moments, this makes the normal and special ones even more fantastic.
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Allison S

#2
January 31, 2018, 05:48:23 PM
Sounds like you're having a hard time right now. Sometimes we push those we care about away. But that's when we actually need them most. I know what it's like to yearn for someone's affection yet be distant from them. In a way it's like inflicting pain on ourselves.. just have to learn how to tear that self sabotage down.

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BJ0909

#3
January 31, 2018, 06:00:24 PM
Quote from: Allison S on January 31, 2018, 05:48:23 PM
Sounds like you're having a hard time right now. Sometimes we push those we care about away. But that's when we actually need them most. I know what it's like to yearn for someone's affection yet be distant from them. In a way it's like inflicting pain on ourselves.. just have to learn how to tear that self sabotage down.

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How do I do this?? How do I tear this down? Its like literally everyone has said to me I love him and I care about him....but at this point its like all of that is not there??? And yet I cry..
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Sephirah

#4
January 31, 2018, 06:08:44 PM
Quote from: BJ0909 on January 30, 2018, 11:52:14 PMI am the one who pushed him away. I am the one who is not capable of caring about him.

Why?

Understanding that might be the first step in understanding how you feel. Are you afraid of something? If so, what?
Natura nihil frustra facit.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~ Buddha.

If you're dealing with self esteem issues, maybe click here. There may be something you find useful. :)
Above all... remember: you are beautiful, you are valuable, and you have a shining spark of magnificence within you. Don't let anyone take that from you. Embrace who you are. <3
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BJ0909

#5
January 31, 2018, 06:17:46 PM
Quote from: Sephirah on January 31, 2018, 06:08:44 PM
Why?

Understanding that might be the first step in understanding how you feel. Are you afraid of something? If so, what?

Because either I am just making all of this up and its in my head and I am just hurting him.......or everything just feels as if I dont love or care about him..
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Allison S

#6
January 31, 2018, 07:17:37 PM


Quote from: BJ0909 on January 31, 2018, 06:00:24 PM
How do I do this?? How do I tear this down? Its like literally everyone has said to me I love him and I care about him....but at this point its like all of that is not there??? And yet I cry..

That was actually for me too. I wish I knew then I would share with you.

What do you think is getting in the way for you? Being vulnerable?

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BJ0909

#7
January 31, 2018, 07:30:54 PM
Quote from: Allison S on January 31, 2018, 07:17:37 PM

That was actually for me too. I wish I knew then I would share with you.

What do you think is getting in the way for you? Being vulnerable?

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Honestly IDK....if all of this is in my head or what.....I know so much about him.....if you knew me in person I could tell you his likes and dislikes etc.
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