Coming out

[Utterly Confused]

Hey guys,

So I just want to know how you came out to your family.  I am a little hesitant to come out to mine because I feel like I will get judged and/or kicked out (I probably won't but I love my family).  I would also need to come out to my family as gay (They have already said that they would support me if I am gay but this is a little different). 

Any tips would be great but I am just eager to hear how you came out <3

[Peep]

I did it gradually - i told my mum (because I shared most things with her) first and then my boyfriend, and my mother told my dad, and then I told one of my brothers because I knew he would be supportive (he's only ever misgendered me once by mistake , the only other person with a better record is my bf) and then my parents helped me tell my other siblings and my extended family.

the most recent person i came out to is my partner's family, because he accidentally referred to me by my proper name and then had to explain why i was no longer using my deadname haha

Some people go for a less gradual tactic, for example a facebook post, if almost everyone you know is on FB you can write all the relevant info down exactly how you want it, but personally I didn't have a facebook when i came out and most of my family wasn't on it so

i think how you do it depends on who you're coming out to really. if they're older and/or less aware of current social issues, you might need to prepare a lot of information, or bring up trans issues in order to test the waters. if they would support you if you were gay that's a fairly positive sign...

it's also useful to have a place to go prepared if you're really afraid of being kicked out

[Kylo]

I wasn't able to do it in person with them because I live halfway across the country, just told a few people by email/on the phone and then the rest of them found out from those. Some people found out through FB because there was a conversation going on there where I casually brought up the topic in the  middle of it. The sharper ones on the list figured it out immediately but some still haven't, lol.

[cartowheel]

I first came out to my girlfriend (at the time, now fiancee) back in around 2011 when I began questioning, so she's been through this whole process with me.  I then told my brothers and her sister.  Slowly started coming out to close friends and other students (including my roommate at the time) and my instructors at my college I was in at the time.  I then came out to my fiancee's family first, starting with her parents, then her siblings, and more recently her young neices and nephews (they immediately started using he/him and my proper name - kids are way smarter and more accepting than most people think).  I finally then came out at work, and everyone uses my proper name and pronouns with very few slip-ups, and they're all very accepting, especially since almost half of us are somewhere in the LGBT+ community. 

And lastly, I came out to my parents and my grandparents.  I waited to tell them, not out of spite, but because I knew they would take it the hardest, and I proved myself right.  My mom is accepting of my physical transition, but not my social, which is weird that she's supporting my desire for HRT, but refuses to use my proper name and habitually 'forgets' to use the right pronous.  My grandparents, on the other hand, are conveniently ignoring it.  They don't even try to use anything right, and my grandma even told a friend of mine that she will never call me by my proper name and I will always be a girl to her.  Yet, this is the same woman who is lamenting that I'm not as close to her as I was as a child (I wonder why???  )

On the other other hand, my dad, whom I haven't spoken to in around 6 years until very recently, is completely and totally accepting of who I am, consistently using the right name and pronouns, even when I'm not around, apologizing when he slips up, and continuously letting me know about LGBT+ events at his work, including taking part in an event that was called "I'll Go With You", where you pledge to be there for trans people if they ever need support using the right restroom (he did this before I started talking to him again).  He also got me a pocket knife with my proper name engraved in it for Christmas, even before he knew of the significance behind the knife itself.

But I digress.  It's just very interesting how sometimes the most unexpected people are so supportive of you, y'know?