how to talk to parents about ffs?

[Aurorasky]

Hi girls,

so here's the situation. I have transitioned with BA and SRS done, and really want to have FFS done. I thought I would never be able to have it until I could actually work, since I still live with my parents and they pay for my education. However, recently I found out my parents have been saving 15,000 euros in a bank account throughtout the years so I could use this money in something of my choice when I reached adulthood. Well, I have. I really want to have FFS but I know my parents would be against it as they find it unecessary. How do I talk to them to allow me to use this money to pay for my FFS? Also, 15,000 euros is not a lot of money so I would have to be selective with the procedures I choose. How would you talk to them about this need?

I think I might prioritize nose job and brow bossing surgery. That said, I think I need orthondic help too but I'm quite sure that would surpass my budget.

[Kendra]

Awesome news but difficult decisions.  I certainly can't come up with the perfect answer - just a few thoughts that pop into mind that might help.

Several topics in transition are time sensitive - especially HRT as it has more impact for people who are younger.  And HRT continues to change soft tissue distribution for several years, in some cases making FFS a lower priority due to HRT's long term impact.  On the other hand FFS involves bone which does not change much during adulthood.  So although you may really want FFS right now pronto, it's not like a timer is running where a delay will make bone work dramatically worse.  If you can wait a bit longer you may have additional options you haven't considered.  You might land a job someday working for a company that partially or completely pays for FFS in their health care plan (that's rare but I am aware of a few companies that consider this a regular employee benefit).  By being patient, you might be able to gain access to the quality of procedure you want without compromise. 

Medical technology has improved.  Jaw work which previously required a grinder can now be cut with an ultrasonic tool to reduce damage to adjacent tissue and improve recovery time.  The best FFS surgeons use the more advanced tools, and we don't know what new improvements in technology will be common in the future.

And consider... money that is wisely invested should grow over time.  Given enough years, the math can be quite astonishing.

Best wishes - and I am excited you have this potential option.

Kendra