So I will do my best to stay somewhat brief here because I tend to type too much when I get excited... I'm really glad I found this page. I was actually looking online for a site that had people's stories they have shared where their significant other, more particularly a married couple, on reactions and results.
I'm an almost 40 yo male and have been married 10 years to a female. I'm still very much attracted to her and I sincerely do love her as much as the day I met her. Unfortunately, and this is my fault, I never really told her about who I was before we met. We never really talked about the things relating to desire and fantasy. As the fabled story has gone so far... the only thing we don't currently have is a white picket fence if you catch my drift.
Don't get me wrong, we've talked much about our past, however certain things have either never been mentioned or if it was brought up or insinuated we just never continued it onward. I go back on my days as a kid, probably around 6 or 7, and specifically remember trying on my mothers lipstick. My brother caught me and yelled out to my mother of what I was doing. Needless to say I remember lying about doing it and moving forward as to not do that again. Something different happened instead... I had an experience with a friend (same gender), probably the time I was 10 or so. It wasn't much but it was an experience. Years after that moved on and I had about another 4 experiences with other guys until around after I graduated high school. Then I had about an on and off 'friends with benefits' relationship with the same guy. Until finally some of my other friends started wondering why this guy wouldn't hang out with all of the group and wondered why he and I always spent time at a strip club. I'll say that the relationship I had with him involved everything sexually. Because of this apparent discovery from a group of my friends, I broke it off and lied to him saying I was dating a girl and that we were going to get married and that we couldn't see each other anymore. And that was it with him. Over the early years there were times I missed him, but as time moved on and I continued dating women (as I had going all the back in high school) I kinda of forgot about it all including my interest in men.
When my wife (then girlfriend) and I moved in with each other we would love to spend the weekends have some drinks and occasional moving to the bed. One night I attempted to do something with her, spur of the moment thing, that not only humiliated me but disappointed me as well. We were well on our way to being drunk, perhaps we may have been, and I took her panties with me outside of the bedroom and put them on my head and walked back in. She laughed historically at this... You know where I'm going with this... The laughter made me think maybe she's into this? I kid you not, that feeling I remember having when I tried my mother's lipstick on, found it's way right back to the forefront of cerebral cortex. I tell myself "go all the way" put her panties and bra on, tuck your junk in between your legs and walk in and see what happens"..... So I did this and yep, the response was immediately... "that's not funny!" I asked her the next day when we were sober if she remembered it and she said remembered what.... To which to this day I'm still not certain whether she was purposely forgetting for me, for her, or for the relationship.
As the years went on, we got married. I found that one day not to long into our marriage, maybe 4 years in, she had thrown some of her panties and bras away in the garbage. Guess who the garbage taker outer was... Yup... me 😊... Without hesitation, I pretended to take the garbage out, but took the underwear out first. And from there, as slow as it has progressed, I'm finally getting there 6 years later.
I'm on full out mode of extreme excitement. I have never been this excited probably in my life aside from some other stuff that have happened in my life. I currently consider myself a crossdresser with bisexual tendencies. However, I am so new to this community that I honestly don't know what is considered offensive and what isn't, so if I have said anything in anyway to offend, I do sincerely apologize. I do see a shrink for purposes of other means and not related to this, but I have talked about it with her and sometimes spent too much time talking about where completely takes up an entire session.
The more I progress in to my crossdressing dream, the more I want to tell my wife about this. Only that... the reaction from her that day has me thinking she won't accept. Granted she has family members that are gay and one that made the switch. And she always talks about how great they are and how much she loves them. I have no doubt in my mind that she has no stereotypes, no ill-will, no discrimination in her blood. I know that if that night hadn't happened, I would have probably already told her about what I'm doing already. But the one thing is that would be the best outcome from telling the truth would not just being her accepting of who I am and what I know I enjoy, but I'd also like to be with her too. I'm currently confined to one room after she goes to bed. I know there are others out there that have struggled in this type of a situation. Any advice is warmly accepted and greatly appreciated.
I'll end this here with the fact that I can safely say I am so comfortable when I dress up, I feel like a new life within me has been born. I just wish I could share it in world we know it as without fearing the repercussions. There is a lot I left out here on my personal experiences and the story with my wife. Some information that I left out may change your perception of how you read this and if it does please ask me a question because I'm quite certain there is an answer.
Thank you all for reading this and if you did make it this far, you have my sincerest of gratitude.
