I came out to my wife last night, and her reaction really surprised me. She has never had much interest in sex, and I always just figured that she had a low sex drive as some women do. She came out to me! Turns out she's been hiding from me for nine years (how long we've been married) that she's bisexual with a heavy leaning toward women. I won't write out the whole conversation, but she admitted she married me to validate herself to her family and had hoped it would "straighten her out".
LONG story short (it was a three hour conversation) she was open to the idea of some transition for me. Her biggest fears are similar to mine: impact on my career (I'm main bread winner, she's stay at home mom), impact on children, and social reaction to being seen as a lesbian couple (we are viewed as a conservative Christian couple). She said what she wishes is that I could have bottom surgery, but remain presenting male. She said she though I would look really cute with female anatomy:). I don't think that is a medical possibility since as far as I know, no surgeon would do the surgery on someone who plans on presenting male. But my therapist and I had already discussed hormone therapy and she believes that she can help me tailor my plan to allow me to look male for quite a while since I have fears about fully transitioning too quickly. So maybe I can find a middle ground where my wife and I can both be okay.
So, wow, what a night. We both got a bunch of skeletons out of our closets. I was scared, but she was really loving and understanding. She was also nervous, since she had been hiding from me for nine years that she feels more attracted to women than men.
