Questioning and afraid

[oonawingedwolf]

Hi.  You can call me Oona. I've joined because since I was small I haven't really felt like a girl much.  In fact when I began exploring my body I thought something was missing.  In my fantasies I play a male more often than not. I get no real joy from dressing up or "looking hot" with make up unless I feel androgynous.  I grew up with people thinking I was a guy because I looked so much like my dad and I would wear tight sports bras or no bra at all to enhance that concept.  I always said I was gender fluid though.  But recently I broke down and came out to both my boyfriends as unhappy with my femininity.  I don't know what to do.  I feel lost.  Like I don't belong anywhere.  What do I do?

[Dena]

Welcome to Susan's Place. Unfortunately none of us can tell you what to do. What we can do is help you find your own answer. This answer varies from person to person and it's based on personal feelings, work, social and family obligations. Some people decide not to transition because the cost is far to high. Others see no option that to transition. Still others find ways of mixing the best of both worlds. For now, you need to understand the basics by asking questions. Because you may not be exactly sure what to ask, I have two links that might help. The first is our WIKI where you will get a better idea of what it's like to be transgender. The second link is "the transition channel" which is more structured toward those who desire transitioning. Feel free to ask any questions you might have.

Things that you should read

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[Northern Star Girl]

Hi.  You can call me Oona. I've joined because since I was small I haven't really felt like a girl much.  In fact when I began exploring my body I thought something was missing.  In my fantasies I play a male more often than not. I get no real joy from dressing up or "looking hot" with make up unless I feel androgynous.  I grew up with people thinking I was a guy because I looked so much like my dad and I would wear tight sports bras or no bra at all to enhance that concept.  I always said I was gender fluid though.  But recently I broke down and came out to both my boyfriends as unhappy with my femininity.  I don't know what to do.  I feel lost.  Like I don't belong anywhere.  What do I do?

@oonawingedwolf
Hello Oona,   Thank you for writing your Introduction with interesting details about your life.   We are so glad that you found your way here to the Forums.
It is great to see that you have taken the step to become a member of Susan's Place and that you have shared your  introduction with us.   

Obviously you stated that have questions and concerns, this is the right place for you to be to find out what others have done that may have been in your circumstances.
 
Be aware that there are lots of members here that can identify with what you may be going through.

***I see that @Dena has already officially welcomed you,
... but please allow me to also WELCOME you to Susan's Place.  You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others  and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.
It is nice that you had signed up so you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other members.
When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. ....

***It's a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new friends here. 

Please come in and get involved at your own pace. 

At the end of the Welcome Message that  @Dena sent to you she included Important LINKS that will tell you about Susan's Place.  Included there is information about the site that will help you navigate around and best utilize the features here.... please be certain to look them over.
Again, Welcome.
Danielle

[V M]

Hi Oona 

Welcome to Susan's Place    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M

[oonawingedwolf]

How do I add my ticker to my signature?

[V M]

How do I add my ticker to my signature?

Done 

[Amaki]

How do I add my ticker to my signature?

The giant egg is in the way whats the full name? Anyway welcome to susans I know how you feel (mind you its in the other way but its still the same thing) I can't say it'll be easy, or fast but finally being true to yourself is the best way. So much about me fell into place I know what my dream job is, I know why a lot of things felt like I was going through the motions.

Stay true to yourself and everything will be alright. ^^

[oonawingedwolf]

The giant egg is in the way whats the full name? Anyway welcome to susans I know how you feel (mind you its in the other way but its still the same thing) I can't say it'll be easy, or fast but finally being true to yourself is the best way. So much about me fell into place I know what my dream job is, I know why a lot of things felt like I was going through the motions.

Stay true to yourself and everything will be alright. ^^

It just says Since Jordy was born   I didn't put my last name.

[oonawingedwolf]

Done 

Thank you very much!

[Amaki]

It just says Since Jordy was born   I didn't put my last name.

ok cool welcome

[Sephirah]

Hi.  You can call me Oona. I've joined because since I was small I haven't really felt like a girl much.  In fact when I began exploring my body I thought something was missing.  In my fantasies I play a male more often than not. I get no real joy from dressing up or "looking hot" with make up unless I feel androgynous.  I grew up with people thinking I was a guy because I looked so much like my dad and I would wear tight sports bras or no bra at all to enhance that concept.  I always said I was gender fluid though.  But recently I broke down and came out to both my boyfriends as unhappy with my femininity.  I don't know what to do.  I feel lost.  Like I don't belong anywhere.  What do I do?

Sweetie, you belong. You do. The world is a better place for you being in it. How you are, and who you are, are two different things. You are valuable okay? You matter. You make yourself who you want to be, so you can BE. That's the whole point. So you can show the world the light behind your eyes free from pain, and self-questioning. So you can BE yourself.

You belong. You matter. You've found a family here who understands you. Who wants the best for you. Take your time. Take some deep breaths. It's okay. You are who you are. Whoever that is, you have so much to offer. Don't let anyone take that away from you.

*big hug* Welcome to the site, hon.