Dating as a Transman

[Nathanyel]

So this may become a bit longwinded so please bare with me on this.

The first relationship I had where I was completely out to them was with a transwoman who understood and accepted me straight away. We supported each other and encouraged each other to be more confident with ourselves. She was kind and loving and caring and just everything you could wish for in a girlfriend. After about a year or so she decided it wasn't working, that we were better as friends.

Now, aside from her, I have no experience in the dating game as the person I am now and that scares me. I've been out on dates with several straight cis girls since and all of them instantly went off me once I mentioned being transgender. It's been heartbreaking having rejection after rejection and once or twice I've been tempted to not mention the dreaded T-word but it's like stifling the real me.

Has anyone else experienced this kind of situation?
Please say I'm not alone in this

-Nathanyel

[Devlyn]

I've never dated anyone without them knowing upfront that I was transgender. I've never been rejected. I  posted a survey awhile back showing that 86% of people would never consider dating a transgender person. Why waste time on them when the 14%  are completely willing to date us? Disclosing upfront saves a lot of false starts.

Hugs, Devlyn

[Nathanyel]

Thank you for your reply. I do get what you're saying about disclosing it from the get go, however I am a generally shy person and I overthink everything so I do find it difficult be upfront with potential partners especially if I really fancy them. That statistic doesn't give me much hope for romance.

But 14% is better than zero at least

-Nathanyel

[Devlyn]

Here's another statistic: Your partner is going to be one in seven billion. Yet it happens all the time. 

For what it's worth, relationships are built on a foundation of honesty...

...so I do find it difficult be upfront with potential partners especially if I really fancy them....

...and it sounds like you need to work on that. 

Hugs, Devlyn