Hello all,
First of all, I'm El, 16, and I'm about 98% sure I'm non-binary. I was assigned female at birth, and although I don't really intend to do any medical transitioning at least until I'm 18, it's a topic that's on my mind a lot, and I've had some questions, specifically about hormones, that I've had a hard time getting answered.
I suppose most of my curiosity comes from my understanding that you need to have either testosterone or estrogen to prevent osteoporosis. At least that's what I can gather from the bit of information I learned in my human anatomy class and some internet sources. The thing is, I don't overly want either...
Part of me figures that maybe once I get my breast removed I could use some sort of birth control that would stop periods, but I've read that a lot of them can increase progesterone and increase the intensity of secondary sex characteristics. At this point, I really don't think I could handle that, but it also seems that when the breast tissue is removed, it can't really grown back, so maybe once that's been done I could handle it. On the other hand though, I already have enough dysphoria around my hip area, that if my coxal bones spread any further I'd be horrified.
So from that, I thought maybe I'd get a hysterectomy and take the bare minimum amount of estrogen to keep my bones healthy and hope it doesn't do anything else. Of course, money would also come into play here, but right now I'm figuring out what would be best for me if money was out of the picture.
Now, I've also heard about hormone blockers, and I've mentioned taking them to my mom, but part of me feels it's too late, cause that puberty stuff already happened. The other part of me is worried that it's not over yet, though, and that it's gonna get worse. I also understand, however, that there doesn't seem to be a whole lot of long term research out there. I suppose if I went this route for the rest of my life they could use my body to do some research, but I'm not sure how much I wanna risk it. So for now, I figure, I'll see if I can take hormone blockers to give myself a little break from androgens for a short period of time while I figure this all out, but I'd rather my bones didn't collapse on themselves, so I doubt I'd be able to take hormone blockers for that long.
The thought of taking testosterone also occurred to me, and I decided, I wouldn't mind (in fact, might even enjoy) a little bit deeper voice and some bigger muscles, but just like I don't want to look female, I don't want to look male either. So, I figured maybe I could just take a little?
Ultimately, I came to the conclusion that I don't want a lot of testosterone, and I don't want a lot of estrogen, so I kinda just want to rip out my overies and start from a clean slate. And hey, maybe my reproductive parts could help scientist figure some stuff out and if medical knowledge and technology has advance enough, I could even give them to a transgender woman. Though I also wonder if hormone blockers could give the same kinda clean slate for less money and health risk. I don't know, I just know I don't want a period, breast, big hips, but I also don't want a crazy deep voice, facial/chest hair, or any of that. I mean, if cats and dogs can get fixed and live a normal life, why can't I?
It seems to be, though, that I'd have to take something, and I'd like that something to be the bare minimum. So I suppose what I want to know is, could I take either estrogen or testosterone in a small enough dose that it would keep me standing but also not cause secondary sex characteristics to start growing like weeds? If that's not an option, could I take estrogen and testosterone 50/50, or are they unable to work together meaning I would need to take a certain amount of at least one to keep my calcium where it's needed? Basically, is there a way to get the hormones needed to prevent osteoporosis while also remaining as androgynous as possible? If so, how, and if not, what can be done to minimize it as much as possible?