...Yet sometimes it feels like a day.
I realised it's been ten years since I registered here. Well, give or take. I'm kind of annoyed that I missed my anniversary by like five days, but who's counting, lol.
I haven't been here for that whole amount of time. Life gets in the way sometimes. I do remember what I was like when I came here, though. Scared. No... terrified actually. Yet full of dreams. Full of ambitions. Hopes. Questions. Some might say innocence. My life was very different then. I was way more talkative. Oddly way more extroverted. Just wanting to make friends. To find a home, a family.
And I did. Probably one of the best ones I ever could have.
So many people have touched my life in this place. So many people who have inspired me. Made me think. Laugh. Cry. People I've come to know as friends. More than friends. People who have... reaffirmed my belief in the strength and capacity inside everyone to achieve things far above and beyond what they think they are capable of.
I'm not going to talk about me, and stuff that's happened over those ten years. That's not who I am. I don't like the attention. I don't... it's just not me. Sufficed to say that my life has changed a lot. My whole outlook on life has changed a lot. I'm not the person I was when I first came here. Part of me wishes I was. Part of me wishes that things had been different. Turned out differently. Not just for myself. But for others. But... as they say... if wishes were horses then beggars would ride.
You can't change what has been, only what will be. Where you go from here.
What I am going to talk about is the people I've met here. The people who have helped me to hold on at those times when it felt like my whole world was slipping. The people who... who show every day the strength of the human spirit. I'm not going to name names. There are too many to count. Every time I come back here I meet people with those same qualities. That same steel in their soul. Those who... no matter how hard things are, they still have a kind word for others. Those who, no matter how much their heart feels like it's going to burst through their chest they still take that step into this world. To find answers to a question they weren't sure they should ask.
People who are amazing. People who are inspirational. People who... don't realise just how much they galvanise those walking in their footsteps.
I'm talking about all of you. Even those of you reading this who haven't yet made an account here. The names have changed over the years, but that spark inside people hasn't. You're here, and you want to understand, to deal with this, and to maybe help others deal with this. That will never stop being a testament of the kind of person you are. The kind of person you want to be.
I guess what I want to say, really, is thank you. Thank you to Susan for keeping this place going, and keeping it a place for those with light in their soul to shine, and to be allowed to blossom into something special. Thank you to the staff... both those who have taken it upon themselves over the years to keep this place running smoothly, and those still here doing the same. And thank you to the people... everyone. Everyone who uses this site. As a guest or a member. Those who keep conversations flowing, questions coming, ideas questioned and examined... and heartfelt feelings laid bare in the hopes of finding kinship and understanding.
Thank you.
Thank you for creating something truly wonderful. And here's to ten more years. May you all continue to shine from the light in your hearts.
All my love.
Lauren.
