My question was whether she's ever been near when someone addressed you as female, and if so, did she react? I ask because the people who've only seen daily, ever-so-slight, incremental change often miss the accumulative, big change.
Back when I was still presenting as male, I attended a workshop with a colleague. Other than her, everyone was else was seeing me for the first time and saw me as female, even though I was presenting as male.
Off to the side, "They see me as female."
"Nah," she replied.
"Just listen," I said.
So, she did, and she heard "she" and "her."
She was astonished. She couldn't see it, i.e. the change in me, but she heard the change in others and understood that they saw it.
I'm wondering if your wife has had a similar experience, because when my colleague did, to the best of her ability, she looked at me anew.
