Hi. I finally decided to post because I found the sewing section and that's very exciting to me. Learning to sew has been one of the best things I've done to help me feel more comfortable with myself. I only wear men's clothing, but I'm 5'2 so most things are too big. I mostly do alterations, but I'm starting to make clothes too. It takes a huge time investment to learn, but it's worth it to not feel like I'm a kid wearing Daddy's clothes.
Anyway, I was never female identified but I didn't realize I was transgender until around 30 years old. Many thanks to Julia Serano's book "Whipping Girl" for helping me figure that out. I had an Ah-ha! moment the second time I read it.
Now I'm pushing 40 and I've been on and off of testosterone for about four years. I'm not out to my family or employer so I take T (at a low-ish dose) until I get to the point where strangers are mostly identifying me as male. Then I freak out because I know I have to come out as trans if I keep taking T. Then I stop for a while and the cycle repeats.
I've been lurking on Susan's Place for a while so it feels good to finally participate. I've been donating since May and I encourage everyone else to donate too. We really need this community. Any amount helps.
Love,
Daniels -- not my real name, but the love is real