A tiny wee victory tonight ahead..

[Sarah77]

I'm going to go to the cinema to see Bohemian Rhapsody.

Yes, so what. But I'm going dressed feminine, bad make up, wig and all.
A 20 minute walk there and back too. No driving...that's the easy way out 

I have a few days of no responsibilities..so I need to walk the walk as well as talk the talk.

[Alice (nym)]

Good on you!  I wish I had that courage... getting there but not quite yet. Do report back and tell us how your night went. I am sure it will be fab!

love
Alice

[Ryuichi13]

 Congrats!

I agree, report back and tell us how it went! 

Ryuichi

[Sarah77]

So I survived. It has been maybe a decade since I felt brave enough to do this.
My heart was pumping as I stepped out the doors, wondering if neighbours would see me.
Every time I walked past someone my heart pumped.  Paranoid that they were staring and mocking me.

I got to the cinema and had to wait an age to be served..so self conscious. Got my peppermint tea and was exhilirated.
Went up the stairs. Went into the ladies toilet to do my lipstick.

Watched a a fantastic film. Walked home..past young men smoking dope. I know I wasn;t even close to passing, but it made me so emotional wanting to.

I just want to be accepted as a woman...and still be a partner to my wife and parent of my kids. I can't have it all...but my goodness that was good for the soul tonight.

Going out on Saturday night to a club, but nowhere near my home.

[Northern Star Girl]

@Sarah77
Dear Sarah:   
I missed viewing your photo but I got the idea of what you were describing.
Every time that you go out and about as Sarah, you will gain more confidence, and if you experience "passing" failures, which we all have experienced in our transition journey, you should consider that as a learning experience and a lesson in how to refine your appearance.

We are your biggest fans and we want to follow your progress as you go forward in your journey.
Thanks for posting.

Hugs,
Danielle

[Sonja]

@Sarah77

Hey Sarah,
Well done brave girl! Sounds exhilarating! glad it went well for you.

Good movie? How would you rate it? Ok for kids?

Sonja.

[Alice (nym)]

Well done Sarah!

What an incredibly brave thing to do.

How did you feel?  Exhilarating? Excited? Happy? Free? Terrified?  or all of those things.

love
Alice

[Sarah77]

@Sarah77

Hey Sarah,
Well done brave girl! Sounds exhilarating! glad it went well for you.

Good movie? How would you rate it? Ok for kids?

Sonja.

Good movie,  but a few adult themes around HIV, drug use etc..

Sorry about photo.,didn't realise Flickr privacy settings would block it. Im not very techie!

[Sarah77]

Tiny victory part II

About to get my eyebrows shaped..asked for a more unisex look.
The beautician looked at me like I have two heads..but gonna brazen it out.

Terrified what she will do to them as I'm not socially out

[billieco18]

Hey Sarah,

That is so awesome you went out to the movies.  Cheers for your courage!  That is huge and not something I have done yet.  However, I have my clothes and hair all ready to go haha!  I imagine the first time I go out it will be terrifying, yet exhilarating and natural at the same time.  I am also thinking of heading up to the movies on Sunday presenting as my female self.  I think it's a great choice for a first outing since it is pretty dark during the movie and also allows you to chill out and not feel like everyone is watching.  Anyway, thanks for inspiring others to get out of our homes and take baby steps to present our true selves to others. 

Best,

Billie

[Sarah77]

Thanks for kind words.
The eyebrow shaping was a great success...therapy and beauty in one!
The beautician herself was lovely despite the bemused reception girl.

I told her I was transgender and said I needed a subtle shape. She slightly shaped thrm and said she can go further next time.

I don't think my wife will mind..very subtle, but just opens my eyes up slightly. Can inch further each time

[Northern Star Girl]

Thanks for kind words.
The eyebrow shaping was a great success...therapy and beauty in one!
The beautician herself was lovely despite the bemused reception girl.

I told her I was transgender and said I needed a subtle shape. She slightly shaped thrm and said she can go further next time.

I don't think my wife will mind..very subtle, but just opens my eyes up slightly. Can inch further each time

@Sarah77
Dear Sarah:
This is great news, congratulations on being brave...   eyebrow shaping is a clear and obvious gender indicator... and as you get braver and go for more shaping and as you progress in your transition journey, the feminine eyebrow shaping will be one of the key elements in your passing ability.   

Please keep us updated, particularly about what your wife now thinks?? 
Thanks for sharing,
Hugs,
Danielle

[Sarah77]

Tiiny wee victory three.
Went to the Way Out Club in London tonight.
Didn't dress up...just my own style. Pink cord dress over a tee and a cat ears tiara for Hallowe'en.

Did slightly better with the make up.
Was chatted up three times...one guy fell asleep seconds later, but still.

Didn't want the carriage to turn into a pumpkin...alas it must.
Nights like these make transition feel 1% possible instead of impossible.

[/url]AC91D739-19C8-4241-9F70-525FBEE1E61F by Sarah O'Hara, on Flickr[/img]

[HappyMoni]

Sarah, I very much admire you facing your fears and getting these experiences. Fantastic!!!

[Sarah77]

thank you all for the lovely words of support. I wish I knew how to give you a reputation boost..but I don't have  clue how to