Outed in Christian publication.

[Cassandra]

All,

I wasn't quite sure where I should post this. I'm sure one of my fellow staff members will move it if it needs to be. This was printed in a publication by a self appointed christian missionary type and was sent to all of his subscribers some of whom attend one of the local baptist churches in our community.

His name is Kerry Jackson and he runs a project he calls Drawing To The Rock(DTTR). He is an artist we agreed to represent in our gallery. He does a performance thing at various churches were he takes three to six large drawing tablets and draws inspirational artworks while inspirational music plays in the background. He performed locally and garnered several new subscribers to his ministry. At the time I was not living full time and as his gallery representatives my wife and I attended the performance and I went as my former self.

I had reservations about representing him from the beginning mainly because he introduced himself in the community by distributing a rather personnal questionaire regarding the religious nature and beliefs of the community and local artists at large. Because his work was not garnering any interest by the public and was found disturbing to some, we informed him that we were no longer going to represent him and that he should come to pick up his work.
Today my suspicions were confirmed. Follows is a transcript of the pertinent reference. I also attached a copy of How to Respect a Transsexual Person.

From: Kerry Jackson
To: Jackson, Kerry
Sent: Wednesday, August 03, 2005 5:06 PM
Subject: DTTR Update


Greetings!

It's been a while since our last update.  The summer .........


On the gallery front...I still have some paintings in J. Reid Art Gallery in Buford, GA.  For the past six months, I've also had some work in ..........Gallery.....Ga.....  I recently was asked by the gallery owner to come pick up my work.  She said that since none had sold, she believed I'd be better off having my work in another location.  When I went there to pick them up, I asked her if it was a simple business decision or was someone offended.  She said that someone did complain about the KKK painting even though they showed the person the scripture reference.  They removed it from the display.  She said that many people were interested in the work, but never negotiated to buy.  I asked her if my paintings initiated conversation and questions.  She said "most definitely!"  I was glad to hear that.  I realize that they have a business to run, but I never told her I didn't really care if they ever sold.  That is not my intent.  Oh by the way, when I arrived to pick up my work, the husband of the gallery owner (who I met at a local ........... Church when I did DTTR there) was dressed in drag.  Yeah...it was weird.

This really upset my wife and I am still burning under my bra because of this reprehensible act. Follows is my reply. Mind you this is a rather scathing reply and I was angry but sent it anyway.

Dear Mr. Jackson,

We received your DTTR update at the gallery and find your references to gallery personnel both distasteful and out of line. First, let me say if we had known you had no intention of selling the work we would not have agreed to represent you in the first place.

We are here to sell art; we are not your personal art museum. Your actions in outing me in your publication has confirmed what I thought from the beginning when you first presented us with your "questionnaire". I told C......, then, that I did not trust people who ask such questions as they are judgmental and duplicitous. You have proven both suspicions to be true.

For your information I was not in drag, but was appropriately attired for who I am  - a woman who is in the process of transforming her outward body to fit the woman inside. It was not, and is not your place to talk about me, my likes or my dislikes in a public forum without my permission.

If you were uncomfortable or felt weird about it, that I can understand, but to out me and misrepresent me at the same time is unconscionable. Not only did you out me in your publication, but it is a publication which has been sent to members of the local Baptist church who did not know that the woman at the gallery and the man in their church were one in the same person. I did not come to their church in my appropriate attire out of respect; apparently it is too much to ask the same of self professed men of God. It is, however, something I would expect of a self-appointed zealot for ignorant fundamentalist Christian beliefs. Your kind always talk about God's forgiveness and Christ's love and understanding, but you are without exception incapable of displaying it to others whose lifestyles or beliefs are not in lockstep with your own.

I find your act reprehensible and will pray that God enlightens you and brings you to the peace and understanding he intended for all of his beloved creation.
I could take legal action against you for your misrepresentation of me and I could potentially shut you down, but I will not do that. Instead, I will ask that you issue an immediate apology explaining to your flock why what you did was wrong. For my part I will find it in my heart to forgive you for your trespass against me. I should point out however, that should we find that your outing of me within this community causes us problems or harms our business in anyway that we will have no choice but to initiate legal proceedings to recover damages from your inappropriate misrepresentations.

FYI dressing in drag, as you put it, generally refers to someone who dresses in the attire of the opposite sex for sexual gratification. A transgender dresses in the attire of the gender to which they identify and has nothing to do with sex. Christians would do well to educate themselves on the difference before throwing out derogatory and inflammatory labels. I am a human being who is just as deserving of proper respect as you or any of your bigoted ilk, irrespective of your personal belief system

Have a nice day!

Cassandra H.......


As you can see I was in no mood to mince words. Perhaps I overreacted but I think not. I welcome your comments

Good Journey,

Cassie

[Susan]

Inaccurate but sadly probally not actionable. I would request that in the name of fairness he publish a correction.  Discussing the removal of his art for the business reasons were good but digressing to the content of the art was bad. Just my opinion but sometimes you just gotta let go on fundies. In the end do I think it will change his mind or enlighten him? No.

FYI let go means to letting them know how you feel not to leave it alone.

[Cassandra]

Susan,

Your coments are probably true. In fairness though he did ask point blank if people had made any specific comments or were offended by anything. We were just being honest with him regarding the KKK painting. Anyway, I here you about letting go of it but I seriously needed to vent. I knew coming here, cooler heads would help me regain my perspective and calm down. I'm still furious but I'll get over it and I do feel better having vented.

Thanks for your take on it.


Cassie

Okay didn't see that FYI. I believe I let go with both barrels. 

[stephanie_craxford]

Hello Cassie.

Don't you just wish you could grab him and give him a good shake.  But sadly I guess in your line of work, you will constantly run the risk of being outed by someone.  I take it from your post that you go to your church in male mode, so in light of what has happened, I can see where this may be a problem for you in the futur.  I wouldn't fret, this won't be the last time this will happen.  As Susan mentioned you could contact him and as for a retraction, but I'm afraid that the damage is done.  Even if he does print the retraction, it's too late now.  Besides there is always his mouth to worry about as well.

Cheer up Hon, don't let this side track you, get on with being Cassie.  There are lots of narrow minded people out there, but only one of you

Take care.

Steph

[Cassandra]

Thanks Steph,

The appearance at the church was just a one time affair to support an artist we represented, and it was before I started living full time. I am Lutheran, Missouri Synod and the church is very accepting. So really no problem there. And it isn't like I'm not out there for all to see it's just that there are those who know and those who don't. This person has made sure that everyone he knows, knows, and that is what P.... me off. We gave this guy a chance despite my reservations and he has now disrespected me.

Well anyway, thanks for the support and the cheering up. No one is stopping me now and I will not be sidetracked by anyone.

Oh by the way, I published a poem early this morning, in the poetry section. tell me what you think.

Cassie

[Sheila]

Cassandra, I think I would have wrote back and asked him if he really did see someone in drag. I would have said that I didn't see anyperson in drag, what are you talking about.
Sheila

[Shelley]

Hi Cassie,

As usual eloquently put. I feel like I would like to give him that shake that Steph talked about. As I've come to realise about you though I know you will hold your head high. I also know that inwardly you will feel a lot of hurt because you chose to extend your hand to help another and the only thing returned is a veryhurtful cheap shot.

I to feel angry at his response but at the time for some of us, myself included, if we found ourself in your position it would not be hurt but a sense that our world was shattered. Sharing this experience with us helps to understand that this is not the end of the world and that we can hold our heads high amongst those who would injure us through hurtful comments and actions.

Thank you Shelley

[Cassandra]

Hello again all,

First off thank you Shelley for your most uplifting comments. I did not know when I posted this that people would find such personal strength in my actions. It is truly wonderful to me that my experience could be such an inspiration. I was moved to tears. What a wonderful place Susan's is.

Now, good news and Susan, sorry hon looks like your going to have to eat your words.
Now I know some of you will be skeptical, and I don't blame you so lets let this play out and see were it goes.

I received a reply from Kerry Jackson what follows is his reply and my response. From his tone I believe him to be sincere, but you will see from my reply that I have put that sincerity to the test. We shall see.


From: Kerry Jackson
To: cassandra@artstruck.net
Sent: Thursday, August 04, 2005 8:36 PM
Subject: My sincere apology


Cassandra,

I am very troubled that I offended you.  It was never my intent to disrespect you or cause you any pain.  For this I humbly apologize and ask for your forgiveness.  I realize now that there was not a good reason to include my personal thoughts regarding you in my recent DTTR Update.  I know I have much to learn on relating to my peers who have a different lifestyle from my own.  Your comments make me realize how much further I need to go in exhibiting true Christ-like love.

Please permit me to address a couple of your concerns.  First, my DTTR Update address list includes only people who have financially contributed to my ministry or have specifically asked to receive it so that they can pray for the ministry.  There is no one on the list from any church in B.........  I placed C....... on the list because she seemed so interested in my ministry.

I admit that my first priority is to initiate spiritual conversations with my art.  Selling my work is secondary to me.  However, I'm not opposed to selling my art.  I would have welcomed the sale of my work in your gallery if someone had been interested.  However, if you feel I misrepresented myself, I again apologize and ask for forgiveness.

As you have requested, I will send out another email and apologize for this offense.

Again, I regret this experience and pray that I will learn and take to heart what God has taught me through you and your comments.

Sincerely,

Kerry Jackson


Dear Kerry,

I believe you are sincere in your apology and I do forgive you. It was forgiven after I had said my piece, for Christ charged us to love those who hate us and to forgive those who despise us for his sake. After all he has done for us I could not do otherwise.

I found my spirit uplifted by your confession that you have much to learn and that my admonitions to you were responsible. I feel that I have served God's purpose and am both thankful and humbled by his wisdom in bringing us together in this instance.

I would ask a favor of you regarding your apology in your email to your newsletter subscribers. If you could find it in your heart to urge love and understanding for the transgendered community in general I believe it would go a long way to bringing more people together in God's love, by doing so.

I have given you a start with the document on "How to Respect a Transgendered Person". You may be able to draw from that. This would be a bold undertaking and I will understand if you do not feel that you would be up to such a task or that your ministry would suffer as a result. I would remind you though that when Christ's disciples admonished him for associating with tax collectors and whores Christ told them that he had not come to save the righteous.

Christ's purpose along with bridging the gap between man and god was also to bring all peoples together in love and understanding. A calling from God is not to be taken lightly nor should it be expected that the road should be easy.

Perhaps there is yet another greater purpose in our crossing swords today. I will pray on this and trust that you will also.

I would be happy to answer any questions you might have on the subject if you wish to know. I am actually quite open about it but like to do so on my own terms and to people of my own choosing.

Peace and Love to you,

Cassandra H....


So there it is for what it's worth. A better end to an otherwise rather c.....y day.

Thank you all again for your wonderful support.

Love to you all,

ooo & xxx all around,

Cassie

[Shelley]

Well said Mam,

With dignity and head held high.

It is concerning that he on one hand talks of a ministry and on the other talks of a lack of understanding in relation to the remarks he made.

You are right in forgiving him and now it is a cross that he must bear. You who have remained a lady throughout and he I hope will search his soul for the understanding of others that his profession so dearly requires.

Perhaps once again your actions will provide guidance. Guidance through by light you have provided to guide him from the darkness of his actions.

I think back to the window you provide of yourself through writing and find now a little more understanding of where the feeling of warmth eminates.

Love and hugs Shelley

[Valerie]

Greetings, all,

My name is Valerie and I am a 30 year old Christian non-transexual female. My mission is to minister to people from all walks of life, and one of those my heart holds dear is the trans-gendered community. My highest desire is to understand others, for only then can we truly love people as they need to be loved. So I found this forum and started reading.  I hope that it's alright for me to participate in these discussions.  I personally don't know anyone transgendered (at least, if I do, I don't know it yet!), which makes it a challenge for me to reach out to anyone.

I apologize on behalf of the Christian community for the ignorance, tactlessness, unkindness, and cruelty that people have displayed towards you in the name of God.  I am grieved to the very core of my being when such atrocities occur.  You all seem to have the maturity and experience to know that there are Christians who not only 'tolerate' your community, but love and welcome you in the name of Christ. 

Cassandra, I applaud your courage in approaching Mr Jackson and am pleased with his subsequent reply.  I pray he will in fact, see the importance of encouraging his fellows towards an understanding of transexual persons. It will take more courage on his part to do that than it did for you to write to him.  This looks like the beginning of what may become true Christian fellowship over time. 

Can you please tell me the origins of the document you referred to, "How to Respect a Trangendered Person"?   I'd like a copy, if at all possible.  I think it will be an invaluable resource, and might also prevent me from committing an unwitting faux pas !!

I'm not big on staying online for several hours out of my day, but I do look forward to future discussions here and hope you'll be patient with my naivete as I learn. 

With Peace and Love,
Valerie

[stephanie_craxford]

Hello Valerie

Welcome to Susan's.

This is a wonderful site dedicated to the support of the transgendered community, their families, and friends and acquaintances.  We offer advice, support,  fellowship, friendship, a safe place to communicate with others, and various forums covering a wide range of topics.

Be sure to read the Site Rules https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html ,  and abide by them, and be sure to browse the Wiki, it is full of valuable information.

Also the document you asked about "How to Respect a Transgendered Person" can be found here:  http://www.kisa.ca/respect.html

So relax, enjoy your stay, and participate where you can, we're a friendly bunch.

Take care, 

Steph

[Terri-Gene]

Hello Valerie, you may call me Terri if you wish to.  Assuming you are as you represent yourself, I wish to extend to you a personal thank you for reaching out to some of the most misunderstood, and perhaps some of the most in need of the love and support of others of all God's creatures.

We, as a group, come in all states of mental comfort and extreams due to the treatment we have received from others and conflicts about what we must do within ourselves due to a condition we did not chose to have, and can do nothing about other then to find a way to live with in a world that would be more comfortable if we did not exist at all, though we have existed throughout history, in all cultures. We raise to many questions in the minds of those who do not understand.

Some may be easy for you to understand and others may be quite confusing, it just depends on thier personal history and the environments they must deal with in thier daily lives.  Have patience with those who confuse you and try to read between the lines.  Most have only love in thier hearts, but have learned to be wary and suspicious of others who are not of their own communities and this may affect the way they relate to others as well as themselves.  And yes, discrimination exists even within our own ranks, but attempts are made to address such issues.

Welcome Valerie, and know that I for one am extreamly grateful to meet any who will stand for the truth within their own communities, regardless of the opposition within thier own community.  As are others who can only speak for themselves.

Terri

[Cassandra]

Greetings Valerie,

I had not expected that anyone else would do much more than read this thread. I was quite surprised to find new reply's. I am amazed that the recounting of this unfortunate incident continues to touch people in such a profound way.

Here at Susan's everyone is welcome. The objective here is to learn, understand and support each other and in doing so understand more about ourselves as well. The most fantastic voyage of all is the journey of life in all of it's facets. For many of us we have gone through the motions of living for many, often too many, years. But, now we embrace life in all of it's wonder it's beauty and it's dark ugly underbelly. We share our happiness and our sorrow with each other. We have a daily communion of thoughts, hopes dreams, triumphs and disappointments. We live were before we were simply waiting and even wishing for it to all be over.

In my heart I have always known that god's love was there for me, as it is for all who embrace him. It has sustained me and kept me alive all these years, and he brought me here, just as he has guided me all of my life. I wish you well in your mission and your voyage of discovery as you read through the pages here and participate in the discussions. Don't be afraid to ask questions. We are a very talkative bunch.  As long as it doesn't get too personal. Even here some things are not asked.

Yes, it will take great courage on Mr. Jacksons part to encourage those in his ministry to understand and accept us. Doing so could cost him his ministry, however it could open the door to a new and better one.

Was it courage on my part to write him? No, I was just angry and hurt. I lashed out in the way I knew best, my words. In the end, it was those words, and god's love that allowed him to see his error and admit to it. Courageous? I don't see how, but I appreciate the sentiment. Again welcome to Susan's I look forward to your future posts.

God Bless You and Good Journey,

Cassie

P.S.

I personally don't know anyone transgendered

You do now.

[Valerie]

Wow! I wake up in the morning and have all these new posts to read! Thanks everyone, for your thoughts. 

I'm not apologizing for anything I personally have done, but on behalf of others.  No, Christians are not the cause of problems---people cause problems--and only when we recognize this can we have true relationship with our neighbor.  Good point you brought up.

Stephanie, thank you for your gracious welcome, and for the link to the document! I have read it and realized my first mistake in using the terms 'transsexual' and 'transgendered' synonymously--forgive me! Oh yes, that means I need to clarify one of my previous statements---in my 1st post I said that I don't know anyone transgendered, but apparently I do because I am acquainted with a couple of transvestites.  But I don't know any transexuals....up until now, of course (smile Cassandra!).  I will definitely enjoy my stay....

Aww, Terri...you know I never expect anyone to trust me until they know me, so your giving me the benefit of the doubt is appreciated.  I hope, though, that in time I will have earned the trust of those I meet here.

It may very well be that in some instances I will get confused on this journey to understanding--in fact, I expect to.  There is a fine line between experience and empathy, and I strive to attain the highest form of empathy since I cannot know you all as you know yourselves.  I expect to feel both your hurt and your joy, your questions and revelations.  As with some of my other experiences, I know that this means I too will have pain....for many times I have felt and cried for the pain of others.  But that's what needs to happen in order for me to love others in the highest form possible. It is a pain I would willingly bear. (When I speak of 'love' in this sense, I don't mean the love in my heart, for that is always there...what I mean is love in action--what tangible ways can I express my love and compassion).

The thought of anyone who'd rather you didn't exist breaks my heart.  No, not only do I want you on this earth, but God in His infinite love, love greater than any human can ever posess, wants you and loves you and accepts you no matter what....don't let anyone, ever, tell you differently. 

Cassandra, I believe that when we open ourselves to others, especially to others who are potentially hostile towards us, it takes courage.   Yes, you were angry at Mr. Jackson, and needed to express that to him.  But the courage I saw was of someone risking themselves to promote understanding towards others as well as for yourself. 

Well I hope this has been cohesive enough--I've been writing a little at a time during the workday and I get interrupted all the time.  I'm going to get off this thread since I've managed to get a little off topic, but I think I'll begin a new thread later.  I'm a sentimental sap who wears her heart on her sleeve, so don't say you haven't been warned   

Valerie Ann

PS---All of you with pics as avatars, you look fabulous !!!!