Sexual orientation?

[Beverly Anne]

This is a very personal thing, and I hesitate to ask, but it's a burning question I have. I know way more trans women who are attracted to other women. I feel like I'm in the minority being attracted to men. I love being admired by men, and it really affirms my female sexuality. What about you girls?

[Maid Marion]

Only women.  Men do nothing for me. 

[ChrissyRyan]

Just women. 


Chrissy

[KathyLauren]

I am only attracted to women. 

I have no attraction to men at all, in fact I feel a bit of revulsion.  I can overcome it and be friendly to them if we have something in common, but that would never become an attraction.

[IAmM]

Definitely only men. You are not alone.

[Kirsteneklund7]

This is a very personal thing, and I hesitate to ask, but it's a burning question I have. I know way more trans women who are attracted to other women. I feel like I'm in the minority being attracted to men. I love being admired by men, and it really affirms my female sexuality. What about you girls?

Very interesting topic! I know running a female hormone profile does change the approach & the dynamic to romantic interaction.

For instance once upon a time I could never see the value in a masculine individual as a romantic interest. Now I can see the value of someone else supplying the sexual impetus. As my disposition becomes more emotional and more dependent on the context instead of raw nudity I can see the value of a lover who is not like that.

In fact to a large extent its not about liking all men - its only special masculine individuals the have that certain something.

Ironically despite a feminine appearance my wife has some strong masculine qualities. Despite my mans man masculine facade I am feminine in many ways. My CIS wife is my guy!

I'm sure if I had transitioned at 18 when I first considered it- I would have ended up with either a man or a transman.

Great topic Beverly!

Kirsten.



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[jkredman]

As a male I was only attracted to females.

What's interesting to me as I transition; I Kate, if I ever met a man that could truly love a fiercely independent and driven female - I believe I could enjoy and love sharing my post-op body with him.

Go figure.


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[Lynne]

I have been in love with men and women as well even before I started my transition and I still wouldn't say that I would lean in one way or another. There are certain features and qualities that I like in people in general regardless of gender.
We'll see if anything changes when estrogen will flow through my veins in high quantities

[luckygirl]

Pan

[CindyLouFromCO]

This is a very personal thing, and I hesitate to ask, but it's a burning question I have. I know way more trans women who are attracted to other women. I feel like I'm in the minority being attracted to men. I love being admired by men, and it really affirms my female sexuality. What about you girls?

I feel the same as you.  I like guys.  However I do think women are pretty.  One thing I learned after transitioning is the sisterhood in compliments about our beautiful selfs.  All women are beautiful in their own way.

We check each other out too.  You learn to use mirrors and when to look and not.

Guys are cute, hot and sexy.  At least to me 🙂

[Linde]

Only women.  Men do nothing for me.

Same here, what are men?  Can anybody do anything with them?

[cassiebythesea]

I'm in an even smaller group: asexual.

When I was a teenager I would do everything possible to have sex (like most teens), but it just never did anything for me. But I kept at it, because I figured that's what I was supposed to do. Some time in my early twenties, I heard about asexuality for the first time, and for whatever reason that was the first time I realized that not wanting sex was a wholly valid option.

Since then, I've freed myself from trying to force myself into having sex. Admittedly I do find women much more attractive, but that may just be out of jealousy.

[Kylo]

When I first mentioned transition to my father one of the first things he said was to ask if I was attracted to women. As if it was the obvious thing to assume. Other people have assumed the same as well - apparently a transman is commonly expected to be a straight man, like most of the rest.

Interesting.

I'm - practically speaking - attracted to men, so I suppose that makes me unusual, even though technically I would be bisexual in terms of what potentially is sexually attractive. It's curious how perceptions of trans people's attraction already exists out there even where people know next to nothing about the condition. If they accept you as the gender you say, then the general idea is that you're going to act and behave like the average member of that gender. I found this a bit weird, since the implication would then be that I spent 16 years in long-term relationships with people I'm not attracted to... for some reason. They seemed to forget all about that. 

[Kirsteneklund7]

I was keen to see your input into this topic Kylo!
It seems the FTM angle is subject to stereotype from the outside just like  MTF.

Love to see what Beverley comes back with as well!

Always love your posts .

Kind regards,  Kirsten.

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[HappyMoni]

I'm in an even smaller group: asexual.

Since then, I've freed myself from trying to force myself into having sex. Admittedly I do find women much more attractive, but that may just be out of jealousy.

Although I don't count myself as one of them, you would be surprised how many asexual people are on this site, Cassie.

I wonder how much gender dysphoria has to do with creating an environment that fosters an asexual view of things. Just posing a question in my head here, I wonder how many transitioners see the sexual part of transition as just too much to deal with after all the other stuff they must deal with. I don't know and I'll shut up before I'm accused of distracting the thread. Ooops!

[Linde]

Although I don't count myself as one of them, you would be surprised how many asexual people are on this site, Cassie.

I wonder how much gender dysphoria has to do with creating an environment that fosters an asexual view of things. Just posing a question in my head here, I wonder how many transitioners see the sexual part of transition as just too much to deal with after all the other stuff they must deal with. I don't know and I'll shut up before I'm accused of distracting the thread. Ooops!

I don't really know if my asexuality (but definitely lesbian leaning) has anything to do with dysphoria or not?  I think it started initially with me being still deeply in love with my ex, and I felt as if I would be cheating on this love, if I would sexually engage with another person.  This could have been a self declared celebrate situation?
Later the decrease of testosterone in my body may have supported this, but now it could be based of some kind of dysphoria.  My penis has shrunk that much that I would not know what I would do with it in any sexual encounter, and this causes me to avoid those situations as much as possible.  So, yes, one could call that to be one kind of dysphoria.

[KathyLauren]

I wonder how many transitioners see the sexual part of transition as just too much to deal with after all the other stuff they must deal with. I don't know and I'll shut up before I'm accused of distracting the thread. Ooops!

I think this is a very astute question, Moni.  I took the liberty of creating a separate thread to discuss it.  https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,243623.0.html

[Ryuichi13]

When I first mentioned transition to my father one of the first things he said was to ask if I was attracted to women. As if it was the obvious thing to assume. Other people have assumed the same as well - apparently a transman is commonly expected to be a straight man, like most of the rest.

Interesting.

I'm - practically speaking - attracted to men, so I suppose that makes me unusual, even though technically I would be bisexual in terms of what potentially is sexually attractive. It's curious how perceptions of trans people's attraction already exists out there even where people know next to nothing about the condition. If they accept you as the gender you say, then the general idea is that you're going to act and behave like the average member of that gender. I found this a bit weird, since the implication would then be that I spent 16 years in long-term relationships with people I'm not attracted to... for some reason. They seemed to forget all about that. 

As another FTM man, I too find it weird that it is assumed that I'd "suddenly like women" by cis people. 

Nothing could be further from the truth. 

I am in a long-term relationship with my (possibly never transitioning FTM) male partner, and have been for over four years now.  Even though I find female bodies aesthetically pleasing at times to look at, it is cis males that I have always been sexually attracted to.  Actually, it took me months to get used to the man that I love having a female body, and during that time, our intimacy was almost at a standstill.  It was an honest case of "Its me, not you." 

We both still find men sexually attractive to look at, but I now am also more aware of exactly why a female body would be also seen as attractive, something I wasn't really aware of until I started transitioning. 

Unusual for me, I now can see the beauty in "fluffy" female bodies, something I also discovered after transitioning.  This is still something I am still thinking about, but the roundness of the female form, accentuated by extra pounds makes it even more pleasing in my eyes.  This is something that I never understood before transitioning.

Ryuichi

[anna.changing]

When I saw my doctor yesterday he asked about my sexuality. He's a lovely gentleman and asked in the nicest way so I didn't feel offended, but I kind of thought it was a little funny, and showed how little  people really understand gender.

It seems to be such a diverse experience for each person.  In the past I've always been with women, but more recently have realised that a big part of that experience was about me trying to run away from my own identity and hide in a relationship.

Having just started on hormones again I'm not thinking too much about who I want to cuddle up with, and kind of expect desire in that area might change & develop as I do. The idea of being with a woman in the future just doesn't feel right, and I really like the idea of being with a man, and have a bunch of dreams in that area, but I also know that at my age and stage most of those dreams may be pretty unrealistic.  Dreams are still free though, and who knows what might happen.  I feel comfortable noticing men a lot more these days.  A muscly torso makes my heart leap and feel weak in the knees .  I think for now I'll vote in the 'like's men' group.

[Beverly Anne]

Thanks, ladies! I love you! As a female, I've always been attracted to boys, men. I married a female to "cure" myself, but that didn't work. I currently date men.