Today I ventured into Victoria's Secret to try on bras, and I was nervous. I didn't know what to expect, you know, a 54-year old man picking up 38B bras then asking for a dressing room. As I have experienced the last 6 weeks, no one really cares what you are doing, they generally ignore you.
So, into the dressing room I go to try on the bra. The first issue is flexibility. How in the world do women do up the bra strap when it is behind you? You have to be fairly flexible. Doing up the bra was an experience.
The second issue is I am pre-op, pre-HRT, and just have plain old "man boobs". How the do you fit these into a bra?
I wasn't really sure about the fit so I asked Nicole, the VS Beauty Consultant, to help me out. Nicole was lovely and understanding. I did ask her how many men come into the store for bra fittings. She said she had helped one man before. I did tell her that I came out recently and this was a new experience for me. She was wonderful and very helpful. Thank you, Nicole.
So, Nicole reminds me that even she has issues doing up the bra behind her back. The trick, attach the strap on the front and spin around the bra so the strap is at the back and the cups at the front. Easier said than done but it worked eventually.
With Nicole's help, I was measured a 36C which means a lot more choice than a 38A, the other option. It also means clothing will drape better and I can wear V-necks, which I am currently avoiding.
At the end of the day, work up the courage to go into a lingerie store and ask for help. We tell ourselves horror stories about how we will be treated and invariably these stories turn out to be FALSE. I had a great experience, know what size of bra to purchase, and the styles of VS bras that suit me best.
When I saw myself in the mirror I was happy to see me with more shape that the bra helped create. I felt whole.
I left the store without purchasing a bra because I'm still at home with my kids and didn't want the bra to be accidentally found with the inevitable questions to follow; my kids don't know I have come out. So, I will wait until I find my new home after I move because of a pending divorce, that is not really related to coming out, just a marriage gone wrong many, many years ago.
I look forward to the day I can choose to dress wearing a bra and women's clothing together.
Hugs Zoey