Chapter 2: In Which Michelle_P lives her life post transition

[Donica]

What fun!!! It looks like everyone was having a great time. I sooo have to come up and visit. I've been to Oregon many times but a trip the Wa to visit with Kenda is a two day road trip from here. One day I will make the trip girls! I have a few pans on the fire to take care of first.

[Michelle_P]

Much fun was had!


Yes, we hit the dance floor.

The crowd was well behaved, for Roslyn...  we did get hit on a few times, by men. [emoji1787] High femme Qties are something they aren't used to. [emoji6]


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[steph2.0]

we did get hit on a few times, by men. [emoji1787] High femme Qties are something they aren't used to.

Okay, now I absolutely HAVE to go! Getting hit on isn't something I've experienced. I must be too old, or the guys around here aren't blind enough for me.

While I joke that the guy in Paris who said, "Bonjour, Baby!" was talking to me, we all know it was Kendra he was leering at.

Not that I'm interested, but it is a form of affirmation...

Stephanie

[Donica]

It looks like Kendra took this cute picture of you two from the stage? Yes indeed! How affirming!!!

[Michelle_P]

I'm continuing to keep busy on a number of fronts.

With my church we are working on finding housing, with a priority for transgender persons seeking asylum at the southern border, as they are in great danger there.  We need sponsors who can house and take financial responsibility for these persons for six months (this is forced by various laws; the asylum seeker is not permitted to work).  I'm trying to keep Michelle's Nest space available for women who need a space for a few weeks while visiting one of the San Francisco Bay Area surgery centers.

I did my Worship Associate thing, and the minister found my Call to Worship hard to follow with the sermon.  The topic was 'change', which I have some experience with.

https://michellepaquette.blogspot.com/2019/01/call-to-worship-for-january-13-2019.html

Today I tried a new electrologist, to do some maintenance.  I've had 235 hours done, and haven't been in for 5 weeks.  Given the active cycle for facial hair, and the presence of some wispy fuzz, I made an appointment for 2 hours.  I was cleared in one.     Huh.  I guess I really am finishing up.  It's been months since my last shave. 

[Jessica]

I'm continuing to keep busy on a number of fronts.

With my church we are working on finding housing, with a priority for transgender persons seeking asylum at the southern border, as they are in great danger there.  We need sponsors who can house and take financial responsibility for these persons for six months (this is forced by various laws; the asylum seeker is not permitted to work).  I'm trying to keep Michelle's Nest space available for women who need a space for a few weeks while visiting one of the San Francisco Bay Area surgery centers.

I did my Worship Associate thing, and the minister found my Call to Worship hard to follow with the sermon.  The topic was 'change', which I have some experience with.

https://michellepaquette.blogspot.com/2019/01/call-to-worship-for-january-13-2019.html

Today I tried a new electrologist, to do some maintenance.  I've had 235 hours done, and haven't been in for 5 weeks.  Given the active cycle for facial hair, and the presence of some wispy fuzz, I made an appointment for 2 hours.  I was cleared in one.     Huh.  I guess I really am finishing up.  It's been months since my last shave. 

You're a good person Michelle, we need more like you.

In regards to ⚡️⚡️ ....lucky you!  I'm only about an eighth of that along.

[Donica]

Wow do I have a long way to go! 235 hours? I barely have 24 hours. Starting next week, I'm doubling up from 20 hour sessions to 4 hour sessions a week.

You are truly an angel for doing all that you do Michelle! I hope I get to meet you this September.

[LizK]

I'm continuing to keep busy on a number of fronts.

With my church we are working on finding housing, with a priority for transgender persons seeking asylum at the southern border, as they are in great danger there.  We need sponsors who can house and take financial responsibility for these persons for six months (this is forced by various laws; the asylum seeker is not permitted to work).  I'm trying to keep Michelle's Nest space available for women who need a space for a few weeks while visiting one of the San Francisco Bay Area surgery centers.

I did my Worship Associate thing, and the minister found my Call to Worship hard to follow with the sermon.  The topic was 'change', which I have some experience with.

https://michellepaquette.blogspot.com/2019/01/call-to-worship-for-january-13-2019.html

Today I tried a new electrologist, to do some maintenance.  I've had 235 hours done, and haven't been in for 5 weeks.  Given the active cycle for facial hair, and the presence of some wispy fuzz, I made an appointment for 2 hours.  I was cleared in one.     Huh.  I guess I really am finishing up.  It's been months since my last shave. 

I did read your piece on FB and thought it was great. I loved the way you built the narrative talking about when you were a little girl. I think it sets the perfect framing for the rest of what you had to say. I bet it was a hard one to follow and I am sure the minister will want to get in front of you next time LOL

I was saying to Laurie yesterday that I have given up on Electrolysis, I could probably stand another 10 hours but to be honest you can't see my fluff and as long as I epilate about once a month I am fine...apart from that I would need to find a way to fund it and that is just not likly to happen. Having said all that there is certainly a great amount of satiusfaction knowing you do not have a beard issue and you are in maintenenace mode.

Take care

Liz

[Michelle_P]

I did read your piece on FB and thought it was great. I loved the way you built the narrative talking about when you were a little girl. I think it sets the perfect framing for the rest of what you had to say. I bet it was a hard one to follow and I am sure the minister will want to get in front of you next time LOL

I wanted to talk about change, the topic of the service, and what I felt constituted a good change versus a bad change.  Second, I wanted to counter some misinformation I've run across within the congregation, that a 'transgender' woman is a man who likes to pretend to be a woman.  Finally, I wanted to poke a little fun at the gender stereotypes that even our psychiatrists fall into honoring.  Yes, becoming an emotional cripple passed as being male, and feminine stereotypes are how a successful transition is judged by some therapists now.  Not mine, thank goodness, but definitely others.

I was saying to Laurie yesterday that I have given up on Electrolysis, I could probably stand another 10 hours but to be honest you can't see my fluff and as long as I epilate about once a month I am fine...apart from that I would need to find a way to fund it and that is just not likly to happen. Having said all that there is certainly a great amount of satiusfaction knowing you do not have a beard issue and you are in maintenenace mode.

Liz, getting the hair down to the point where you can put up with it is the real goal.  If you have achieved that, you are 'done'.  All women our age get some hair, including formation of terminal hair, and I know that I have less facial hair than many cisgender women my age. (Sorry, H, but you damn near have a goatee!). Epiliating is really common among older women.

[LizK]

I meant to say that is a great photo of you and you look really well.!!

[Michelle_P]

I meant to say that is a great photo of you and you look really well.!!

Thanks!  I feel the best that I have in decades, which I find amazing.  I should probably try one of those before/after photos, or a transition timeline.

The photo was a phone selfie while sitting on my sofa.  I have a little makeup on, but that's just me, no filters or digital magic.   I was surprised, because that's generally not who I see in the mirror. (That oddball latent stale mental image thing again.  I'll get past it with a few more months passed.)

[Jessica]

Thanks!  I feel the best that I have in decades, which I find amazing.  I should probably try one of those before/after photos, or a transition timeline.

The photo was a phone selfie while sitting on my sofa.  I have a little makeup on, but that's just me, no filters or digital magic.   I was surprised, because that's generally not who I see in the mirror. (That oddball latent stale mental image thing again.  I'll get past it with a few more months passed.)

You are in truth quite pretty!  The work you had done was successful.

Hugs, Jess

[JudiBlueEyes]

This is a wonderful transformation Michelle!  Dramatic yet subtle.  Nothing but woman. 

We all seem to have those stale latent images rumbling around in the brain.  Time to overwrite that data!

[Michelle_P]

It's a rite of passage.

I am sitting in the doctors office awaiting my first mammogram.   I'm all nerves and "what-ifs".   We shall see.

Here we go.
...


Ow.

Four images, vertical and at 45 degrees. A fairly hard pinch after considerable tugging by the tech. But, it's done.

I wasn't lectured on not doing this earlier. I wasn't misgendered. Nobody even mentioned my trans origins. I was just another woman.   That was nice, actually.

Good images, according to the tech. Now they go to the radiologist.


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[Jessica_Rose]

I hope you get a clean bill of health Michelle. I had my first mammogram on 16 Jan, then went back on the 18th for a ultrasound to check something suspicious, but they said everything was fine. Now they want me to have a pap smear!

[Michelle_P]

Now they want me to have a pap smear!

Um.  Pap smear involves collecting cells from the cervix — the lower, narrow end of the uterus that's at the top of a natal vagina.

Our postop anatomy resembles that of a person after a complete hysterectomy with cervical closure. No cervix to scrape for cells!

A Pap smear would not be appropriate or useful.


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[steph2.0]

Now they want me to have a pap smear!

Ha! At one of my appointments last year one of the front desk nurses who knew me in the before-times pulled me aside and quietly told me that my insurance company was insisting that as a woman I needed to get a pap smear. Would I call them and fix that so they'd quit bothering them about it?

It was kind of cool, but also yet another "toad to eat." I deferred it for a while, but she bugged me about it at the next appointment - apparently the insurance company was getting quite insistent. When I called them about something else I outed myself and asked to fix it, and it was just business as usual at their end. I haven't heard about it since.

Stephanie

[Jessica_Rose]

Now they want me to have a pap smear!

I realize this was a software-generated request, one I will never be able to fulfill, but I take it as an affirmation of entering a new world.

[Michelle_P]

The newer software systems that drive these notifications are getting better.  Rather than driving all these tests off of the M or F markers, there are 'inventories' of anatomy that can be checked off.  Switching gender markers or setting them for a new patient populates the inventory with default settings, but it is possible to get a knowledgable person to customize the inventory.

Not all women have a cervix or uterus.  Not all men have a prostate gland. 

Some men do have a cervix, uterus, and ovaries.  Some women have prostate glands.  These items do have to be checked as part of regular medical care.

It is important to make sure that the clinician is aware and the medical record reflects the proper inventory of bits that need checking.

[sarah1972]

I like the "rite of passage" statement. That is how it felt for me last week. I know most women dread it very much (yeah, even my wife drags her feet on it). Oddly enough, I could not wait and it was hard to hide my excitement. Very similar to my feelings when I first saw an OBGYN...

Of course I was very interested in the machine itself, seeing these they used 20lbs of pressure on my breasts... Only me would even notice stuff like this.

I was treated like any other woman, even though my ID and paperwork clearly states male.

Anyways, still waiting on the results.

I already talked to my OBGYN about post op care, and she knows she will be part of the care team.

Pap smears don't make much sense. But we will see what she comes up with...

Hugs,

Sarah

It's a rite of passage.

I am sitting in the doctors office awaiting my first mammogram.   I'm all nerves and "what-ifs".   We shall see.

Here we go.
...


Ow.

Four images, vertical and at 45 degrees. A fairly hard pinch after considerable tugging by the tech. But, it's done.

I wasn't lectured on not doing this earlier. I wasn't misgendered. Nobody even mentioned my trans origins. I was just another woman.   That was nice, actually.

Good images, according to the tech. Now they go to the radiologist.


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