The Journey of Katie Ellen

[Katie Ellen]

Well, looks like I have non displaced rib fracture. Six weeks to heal fully, but it doesn't hurt that bad.

[christinej78]

Well, looks like I have non displaced rib fracture. Six weeks to heal fully, but it doesn't hurt that bad.

Hi Katie,                      30 January 2019

Sorry you had to experience a broken rib. They can be painful. They used to tape you up then they figured out we couldn't breathe properly, which made contracting pneumonia almost inevitable.

Take care of yourself and your Rock; tell her I said Hello. God Bless you both.

Best Always, Love
Chris

[pamelatransuk]

Hello again Katie

Always wise to have these things checked out. Glad you are not in much pain and hoping the present pain soon subsides and wishing you a speedy recovery.

Hugs

Pamela

[Katie Ellen]

So I just passed my 9 month mark on HRT. I take estradiol (sublingual) and Finasteride. I'm very careful taking my Estradiol. When I started I took some measurements so that I had a baseline to track my progress. I also took pictures.

I know it's a long process, but I'm starting to get pretty disappointed. The only thing that's changed is I've gained an inch in my bust and maybe a half an inch on my hips. I was on a pretty low dose the first 3 months, but a decent dose since. I do see changes in my face and body hair. Actually, my body hair has pretty much stopped growing and I can go almost 3 days without shaving.

I have my 9 month follow-up and labs coming up in a few weeks. I think my estrogen level will be good, but my testosterone will probably be higher than I'd like. My labs were E 150 and T 362 at 6 months (US).

I feel good with very low dysphoria and I'm usually pretty optimistic. But I'm just starting to feel like this isn't going to work! I hope I'm wrong.

[Northern Star Girl]

So I just passed my 9 month mark on HRT. I take estradiol (sublingual) and Finasteride. I'm very careful taking my Estradiol. When I started I took some measurements so that I had a baseline to track my progress. I also took pictures.

I know it's a long process, but I'm starting to get pretty disappointed. The only thing that's changed is I've gained an inch in my bust and maybe a half an inch on my hips. I was on a pretty low dose the first 3 months, but a decent dose since. I do see changes in my face and body hair. Actually, my body hair has pretty much stopped growing and I can go almost 3 days without shaving.

I have my 9 month follow-up and labs coming up in a few weeks. I think my estrogen level will be good, but my testosterone will probably be higher than I'd like. My labs were E 150 and T 362 at 6 months (US).

I feel good with very low dysphoria and I'm usually pretty optimistic. But I'm just starting to feel like this isn't going to work! I hope I'm wrong.

@Katie Ellen
Dear Katie:
At the risk of me telling you what you may have already heard... here is important stuff for you and anyone no matter where they are in their transition journey.
...here are some of my thoughts as it may relate to what you are going through.

As has been stated over and over here on the Forums... and by me in many of my past comments on various posts, HRT will work uniquely in your own unique body.
What you read about other transitioning members experiences with HRT most likely will not be identical to your own experiences.

Some will experience more significant changes more quickly and then some will experience less significant changes more slowly....   it is all up to your genes and how your body reacts to the HRT.   Your doctor will  undoubtedly be continuing to look at your frequent blood test results during your journey to determine if any alterations in the HRT regimen are needed.

The adage that you have probably already heard regarding HRT and how it may work for various individuals  is "YMMV"  meaning that Your Mileage May Vary.
   
PATIENCE is definitely required.... usually not much happens very quickly with HRT... but changes will happen.  Do some reading of other transitioners posts and look at many of the posted HRT timelines and the before and after pictures. ....  they can give you a rough idea of what you MIGHT expect.

Many times the very first noticeable changes can be felt and seen within the first 2 to 6 months... breast tenderness, breast bud lumps forming under the nipples and as you mentioned, changes in body hair growth, also your own body and urine smell, changes in erections becoming less intense, libido, etc.

Without a doubt this can be very "EXCITING and SCARY all at the same time."   One needs to hang on for an amazing ride.  Some of my best and most appreciated and dramatic body changes happened at about the 5 month point through the start of year #2 of my HRT journey. 

Regarding your body measurements, it is good that you have established a reference point and even taken some photos for comparison and allowing you to judge your body changes.   As you stated you have already seen gains in your bust and in your hips.  For me, I did not gain a whole lot in my hips but mybreast growth was very good and after 2 years of HRT my breasts were a C-cup.   
Many will achieve an A or a B cup and some transitioners may possibly achieve a C-cup or even a D-cup.
Even though I was able to very successfully pass before I went full-time... when I did go full-time at the 1 1/2 year mark I have been passing 100% of the time.  Of course that is just my experience, I suppose I can thank my body makeup and my genes for all that.

We are here to rejoice with you in the good times and to support you in the not so good times.
One more time.... PATIENCE is required.   The attitude of many people today is "I want it all and I want it now" ... that will not apply to HRT.  You might want to re-read what I just wrote so you can get a good grasp of the details that I mentioned.

Katie, please try to not be disappointed with your progress... things will happen with HRT, but in their own time and in their own ways in your unique body.

I will be looking forward to your continued updates as you feel free to post them.  Please hang in there!
Hugs and well wishes
Danielle

[pamelatransuk]

Hello again Katie

I note you are now 9 months HRT and am sorry to see you are feeling down at present.

I saw significant changes after 8 months HRT and continue to do after one year HRT. It could very well be that physical changes may now start to happen for you and I truly hope so but of course no set time can be determined as regards HRT but rest assured changes will ultimately happen.

Good luck with your BT results  - please post them on my new "Comparison 12/13 Month" thread on HRT Board (which incorporates all earlier results). Thanks

More importantly good luck with future HRT changes and hoping they happen in the next quarter.

Hugs

Pamela  xx

[LizK]

Well, looks like I have non displaced rib fracture. Six weeks to heal fully, but it doesn't hurt that bad.

@Katie Ellen

Hi Katie

Rib fractures can be really annoying and I have only ever had one but it seemed to niggle for ages. I hope yours heals really quickly with no issues
Liz

[Katie Ellen]

I have a therapiy session tomorrow. First one in about 6 weeks. I think I'm going to discuss stopping my treatment. 

I don't think this is working!

I wish all of you better luck than I had.

[christinej78]

I have a therapiy session tomorrow. First one in about 6 weeks. I think I'm going to discuss stopping my treatment. 

I don't think this is working!

I wish all of you better luck than I had.

Hi Katie,                       20 February 2019

I'm happy to see you posting again. Your new avatar is fantastic; you are very beautiful.

I am concerned that you are considering stopping your treatment. I'm no expert and I don't try to give advice but will make a suggestion or two.

How about giving yourself more time before discontinuing HRT. If the only thing bothering you is the slow progress, why not wait a few more months. There's also Dysphoria to consider; I don't know what level yours is or was, but if it was there before HRT, it could return if you stop treatment.

I'm between a rock and a hard place, I'm being treated for a DVT and have had to discontinue HRT. I do not like the changes I am seeing in myself. My boobs have diminished, I'm not as carefree as I was when I was on HRT, I don't sleep as well and I don't Pee as well as I did. My "T" has risen and my "E" has dropped. The positive is that I am still on the green side of the lawn and my "T" can't get too high due to my Orchiectomy. Please don't think I am suggesting an orchi because I'm not. This would be a bad time to make a decision to have one because it is irreversible. Time is your ally

If there is anything I can do for you, please don't hesitate to PM me. I wish you only the best in life and hope you give careful consideration to whatever decision you make. Tell your wife I said hello and hope and pray she is doing and feeling well.

Best Always, All my Love
Christine

[Katie Ellen]

Geez! I just spent an hour recapping the last 5 years and my session timed out! All lost. I'll try later. I'll make sure to adjust my session time before!

[Northern Star Girl]

@Katie Ellen
Dear Katie Ellen:
I am so very happy to see that you came back to your Blog thread to give it an update.

It was good to see that you were able to get signed in to the Forum again just a couple
weeks after the New Years site crash.... and I was hoping that you would start posting
again... I always have enjoyed seeing and reading your comments and posted thoughts.
 
Oh for sure, I feel your frustration regarding losing an hour or more of your work on
posting your recap of your last 5 years...  I have felt the same frustration from
time to time.  If I find that my draft is getting longer and longer, I try to make a point to
save it while it is in progress so that I don't lose the entire thing when "things" happen.
I have also started to compose a lot of my postings on Word Pad or other offline programs.

I am eagerly looking forward to your Blog update and other postings around the various
threads and topics on the Forum.

Many HUGS,
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Geez! I just spent an hour recapping the last 5 years and my session timed out! All lost. I'll try later. I'll make sure to adjust my session time before!

[Katie Ellen]

Thanks Danielle!

I started HRT in the summer of 2018. A very low dose (sublingual) that slowly increased over the next year. I could never take Spirolactone, so the doctor had me taking Finasteride with it. Progress was really slow. The biggest changes were to my face and body hair disappearing.

Two years later in 2020, Covid struck. I was scheduled to have nose surgery for a deviated septum and some modest cosmetic improvement. The surgery was cancelled. In the fall they rescheduled the surgery, but wanted me to take a cardio stress test first. I walked a lot so I wasn't concerned. A few weeks before, my wife had taken one and it was harder than she expected. And she's in better shape than I am. Anyway, as I was on the treadmill, about halfway through the test, they suddenly stopped me and had me lay down. A doctor came in and told me the only place I was going to was the ER. After 2 days of tests, they told me I was lucky to be alive. I had no pain, but had 90% blockage in my main left artery (the widowmaker) and a significant amount in others. I had heart surgery the 3rd day. They bypassed 5 arteries in about 5 hours of surgery. The first day was kind of rough, but I recovered well and went through a 3 month rehab a month after the surgery. I'm fine now, but they stopped my HRT completely.

About 8 months later they approved my nose surgery. I had to stop the blood thinners I was on since the heart bypass surgery. This surgery actually seemed harder than the heart surgery. My nose was packed for a week and I could only breath through my mouth. I was really black and blue for about a week. Just when I started looking better, I started having slight nose bleeds. They didn't last long though. I had to go back to the doctor at 10 days post op to have the packing removed. The doctor said the slight bleeding was normal. Well a few days later I learned it wasn't. I was home all alone and the bleeding started heavily and wouldn't stop. It's too gory to describe, but I ended up calling an ambulance. They took me to the nearest hospital, not the one where I had the surgery. I was there 6 hours and lost a lot of blood. Much of it I was swallowing evidently. They were afraid of damaging my nose and the surgery changes, so they took me to the other hospital to be safe. After 2 blood transfusions and about 10 different stents jammed up my nose, they got it to stop. I thought that it was over, but the nosebleeds started again that evening. I was able to stop them, but it was terrible. Finally, about 5 days later, I had a bad one that wouldn't stop. My wife drove me to the hospital where I had the surgery. They finally determined I had a nicked artery from the original surgery and they would need to do another surgery to finally fix it. It was fine after that.

Soon after that, My cardiologist gave me the green light to resume HRT. I was basically starting over though. It took me a year to get back to where I was before the heart surgery. I was having a very hard time reducing my T levels so my doctor and I discussed me having an orchi. I made an appointed for a consultation for the last week of December 2022. On Christmas morning I tested positive for covid. Had to cancel and reschedule for February. I was approved and started working on my letters. I had the orchi in August 2023. After what I had been through, this was a breeze!

I now have my letters for bottom surgery. It's time to set up my consultation, but I'm hesitating for some reason? I keep saying tomorrow, but so far I haven't.

So that's where I'm at today. Sorry this is so long for anyone that actually reads it, but I'm trying to bring this log up to date and push myself to make that consultation appointment.

Thanks!

[Sarah B]

Hello Katie Ellen

My name is Sarah B and I would like to formally, Welcome you back to Susan's Place!

I'm not going to do a formal introduction to a member who has been here before.  I'm lucky that did not happen to me!  I joined up with Susan's in 2010 stayed for around 2 years and disappeared for 11 years and just recently dropped back in.  It's still a nice place to come to.

I see that Danielle has greeted you with such a warm welcome as well.

Just recently I was writing a couple of posts and when I start writing I cannot stop for some unknown reason and you guessed it through some unforeseen circumstances I lost the lot, to say it mildly "I was not happy Jan".  I should know better.  So as Danielle mention I write my stuff offline in Libre Office and saving every couple of minutes.  So if something happens I only lose very little, if that.

So please write your story again,  I was really enjoying what you all ready said in your blog and of course I will certainly appreciate what you do write as I enjoy reading what others members have done in their lives.

When I came back to Susan's this time I have started my own blog and it's called Sarah's Story and there is a link below my signature that will take you to the beginning.

Take care and if you need help I will help you if I can.  Once again, Welcome back to Susan's Place!

Best Wishes and Hugs
Sarah B
Official Greeter

[Maid Marion]

Hi Katie,

Sorry to hear of the Coronary Artery issues.  I have an annual EKG which presumably will detect that.

Good luck on scheduling bottom surgery!

Marion

[Sarah B]

Hello Katie Ellen

I'm sorry to hear that you have had such a hard time over the last five years? In regards to your health. It is good to hear that you are both in good health today.

You was writing your post just as I was writing my post to you.  I seem to be getting a lot of coincidences lately, they are so funny.

You just mentioned in your post and I specifically quote the relevant passage:

Soon after that, My cardiologist gave me the green light to resume HRT. I was basically starting over though. It took me a year to get back to where I was before the heart surgery. I was having a very hard time reducing my T levels so my doctor and I discussed me having an orchi. I made an appointed for a consultation for the last week of December 2022. On Christmas morning I tested positive for covid. Had to cancel and reschedule for February. I was approved and started working on my letters. I had the orchi in August 2023. After what I had been through, this was a breeze!

Nothing like ticking off another problem on ones journey.  The set backs you have had and all you do is keep bouncing back and saying is that all you've got?  I'm amazed at what you have done and achieved.  So the message in what you have said is embedded in what you have written and that is; "you don't give up on what you want to achieve", it is so inspiring.  I thank you for that.

I now have my letters for bottom surgery. It's time to set up my consultation, but I'm hesitating for some reason? I keep saying tomorrow, but so far I haven't.

I ended up with 3 surgery letters (I only needed 2) and I have mentioned them in one particular post, but I will bring that post into my story in "Sarah's Race to SRS Part II", in my blog.  I then made an appointment for surgery and eventually I had my surgery in Feb 1991.

I once thought of detransitioning and this only lasted for about 30 seconds and then I said to myself no way in hell, would I do that.

I have mentioned the following part in a couple of posts, but something that I have not mentioned before in those posts I will this time, the thinking part in a little more detail.  I arrived at the hospital one day before surgery instead of the two days and I was sitting with a long time friend who drove me there.

I sat in the passenger side and for about 1 minute or so and I said to myself; "is this the right thing to do, should I go through with it or similar thoughts", the thinking on this was brief to say the least. The answer to those questions were, getting out of the car without thinking, well, I think I said to myself, "I want the surgery or something similar", it was so long ago and walking straight into the hospital, with no regrets or hesitation whatsoever.

Thinking about that moment in time, it seems to me that 1 minute or so was really just a blank regardless of what I thought at the time, no intellectual discourse on what I should do.  It also seems to me a waste of time even thinking about it.  Why?

For as long as I can remember, I always wanted or longed to be a female.  So subconsciously or conscious without me thinking about it, I got out of the car and walked straight into the hospital and as just stated "I have had no regrets, even to this day".  The only reason I ever had surgery, was so that I could function as any other female in society.

One more thing before I leave you with what I just wrote above.  To this day if I think about what I once had downstairs makes me feel very nauseous.

So that's where I'm at today. Sorry this is so long for anyone that actually reads it, but I'm trying to bring this log up to date and push myself to make that consultation appointment.

Thanks!

What you have written is not long by a long shot!  I hope the above passages helps you in some small way.  What ever you decide to do, that is totally up to you and you only.   You will be supported no matter what you decide, here at least at Susan's. 

For me, whatever I do, if it makes me happy then I will do it.  All the best for your future.

Best Wishes and Hugs
Sarah B
Official Greeter

[Katie Ellen]

Hi Katie,

Sorry to hear of the Coronary Artery issues.  I have an annual EKG which presumably will detect that.

Good luck on scheduling bottom surgery!

Marion

Thank you Marion

Just be careful. Although EKG's can detect other issues they usually show problems with the electrical system of your heart. My EKG's weren't that bad. It was the stress test and eventually an ultrasound and heart catheterization that showed the artery blockage. Usually there's chest pain when it gets bad, but I didn't have that. Not even during the stress test.

[Katie Ellen]

What you have written is not long by a long shot!  I hope the above passages helps you in some small way.  What ever you decide to do, that is totally up to you and you only.   You will be supported no matter what you decide, here at least at Susan's. 

Thank you Sarah! It did help.

I actually filled out the required form to set up a consultation and emailed it in! So I feel good about that! A good day!

[Katie Ellen]

Just a little comparison I made.

[Northern Star Girl]

@Katie Ellen

Wow.... very nice!!!

Thank you for sharing.

HUGS, Danielle

[Katie Ellen]

I think maybe this log should be moved to the members blog section? Can that be done?