Tops... where to compromise?

[Alice (nym)]

I am finding it surprisingly difficult buying a top...

I can barely get the length, and then there are the shoulders... and don't get me started on the sleeve lengths.

Any suggestions? 

[Jin]

There are many choices, one of the reasons I like fem clothes. I have shoulders too, and a bulge where my waist should be. I like my summer tops best, tanks, camis, sleeveless tunics, (remember the shoulders?)
In winter I wear mostly dress shirts or sweaters. Today I have on a skirt and a thermal Henly knit and after looking in the restroom mirror realize that I should have worn a bra! Oh well, too late now. The boys at work get a free show!

[Linde]

I am finding it surprisingly difficult buying a top...

I can barely get the length, and then there are the shoulders... and don't get me started on the sleeve lengths.

Any suggestions?

another benefit we intersex people have, we did not develop broad shoulders (when I was younger, I did every exercise know to man to get them, it did not work!).  I can wear women's XL stuff without any problem, fits me just right!

[ChrissyRyan]

I tried on one today but it was a tad too tight in the shoulders and chest.
It really made my smallish boobs look larger, as the material seems to grab ahold of them, but mostly the top was a size too small.

Chrissy

[NatalieRene]

another benefit we intersex people have, we did not develop broad shoulders (when I was younger, I did every exercise know to man to get them, it did not work!).  I can wear women's XL stuff without any problem, fits me just right!

How do you know if you're intersex or not?

I ask because I have the same build as my Mom.

[Linde]

How do you know if you're intersex or not?

I ask because I have the same build as my Mom.

I was tested and have he XXY chromosomes.  I might have some other things going on, too.   But the major factor seams to be the XXY guys!

This could be an indication for something.  many intersex persons do not develop any gender typical secondary sex characteristics.  I do not have body hair (no hair on my legs, torso, or under the armpits).  My pubic hair does not try to grow up to my belly button, in fact it is so nice and grows almost in a nice bikini trimm configuration.  I do not have an Adams Apple, and a rather high pitch in my voice (I normally sing on the level of a mezzo soprano  singing is easy, because the trained on male speech pattern is eliminated).  I have no receding hairline or bald patches on my head.  In fact, my hairline starts pretty low on my forehead, like it is common with female.
My avatar picture shows my face  the way it is, I had no surgical intervention.  You can see that there is no Adams Apple.

If you display those traits, it could very well be that you are intersex!

[sally0196]

Alice,

Finding a top that fits is hard I know.  I have typical male shoulders, but thankfully they aren't too broad.  My problem is the length.  I have very long arms for a male, so finding anything long enough in a woman's top is pretty difficult.

A couple of suggestions for you is to think about tops with 3/4 sleeves.  They are supposed to be short, so they look good.  Another idea if you have your heart set on long sleeves, is to check out the website "Long Tall Sally."  They have women's clothing specifically designed for tall women.  I believe their clothes also are a little more roomy through the shoulders.

You might also try to find tunics or other tops that are supposed to be roomy by design.  I actually have a couple of blouses that are supposed to be loose fitting, and because of that, they fit me really well.

Oh, by the way, I am in no way affiliated with "Long Tall Sally," the namesake is merely a coincidence.

I wish you all the best.

Hugs,

Sally

[TonyaW]

Try it on.  Lots of trial and error and size varies between brands also.  Short sleeves or 3/4 I can usually find a decent fit. I like to roll up the sleeves on flannel shirts and the like so don't worry about those either.
But yeah, long sleeves are tougher,  for a tall girl especially.  Old Navy and Pennys have tall sizes, but only online.  Longer sleeves and over all length.  I've tried tying on in store to get general fit and then ordered tall size online. Not the best way but has worked out.


Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

[KathyLauren]

There is no substitute for trying clothes on.

I am not very big (5'8", 150 lbs), but I take a large in tops due to my shoulders.  Having said that, a large usually fits me well.  I am usually a 10, but in tops, I may have to go to a 12, while in bottoms, I can sometimes wear an 8.  Dresses are problematic for that reason, and I prefer separates.

Women's tops tend to be shorter (unless they are tunic length) because women tend not to tuck them in like men do.  Short sleeves (i.e. 3/4 length) are fashionable.  My wife is always complaining about tops that are made for orangutangs, with sleeves that are far too long for any human.  You just have to shop around until you find a style you like.

[ChrissyRyan]

Trying them on before buying is best.

Amazon Fashion lets you return most items, I think with no return shipping cost.
Look this up, you might need to be a Prime member.  But they offer free trials of Prime.
Plus there is a lower student Prime rate.

Chrissy

[Gabrielle66]

I haven't yet tried to buy any fem clothes. I do think that I am going to venture out to our local Goodwill and see what I might be able to find so that it doesn't cost too much to begin with. Apparently, they have dressing rooms like your typical stores. I would love to find something that lets me feel feminine and doesn't look horrible on me. I have very short arms but a large tummy. I am working on getting myself into a better physical condition. Once I can lose that tummy, I believe that I will be able to feel much more feminine in my presentation. I don't plan on coming out in the next couple of months in public but it is also time to put away my fear and be myself. The world has no right to force me to be something I am not. I am not going to be stupid about it but I have decided that Gabrielle is going to be present starting this year. Love and faith to you all.

Gabrielle

[Linde]

I haven't yet tried to buy any fem clothes. I do think that I am going to venture out to our local Goodwill and see what I might be able to find so that it doesn't cost too much to begin with. Apparently, they have dressing rooms like your typical stores. I would love to find something that lets me feel feminine and doesn't look horrible on me. I have very short arms but a large tummy. I am working on getting myself into a better physical condition. Once I can lose that tummy, I believe that I will be able to feel much more feminine in my presentation. I don't plan on coming out in the next couple of months in public but it is also time to put away my fear and be myself. The world has no right to force me to be something I am not. I am not going to be stupid about it but I have decided that Gabrielle is going to be present starting this year. Love and faith to you all.

Gabrielle

I wish you luck and success with your transition.  And yes, the world has no saying about what you feel you are!
It took me many years to come to this conclusion, and I wish it would have happened earlier!

Good luck with your path!
Hugs
Linde

[PurplePelican]

I was tested and have he XXY chromosomes.  I might have some other things going on, too.   But the major factor seams to be the XXY guys!

This could be an indication for something.  many intersex persons do not develop any gender typical secondary sex characteristics.  I do not have body hair (no hair on my legs, torso, or under the armpits).  My pubic hair does not try to grow up to my belly button, in fact it is so nice and grows almost in a nice bikini trimm configuration.  I do not have an Adams Apple, and a rather high pitch in my voice (I normally sing on the level of a mezzo soprano  singing is easy, because the trained on male speech pattern is eliminated).  I have no receding hairline or bald patches on my head.  In fact, my hairline starts pretty low on my forehead, like it is common with female.
My avatar picture shows my face  the way it is, I had no surgical intervention.  You can see that there is no Adams Apple.

If you display those traits, it could very well be that you are intersex!

Before going to the expense of a karotype test, have a look around at your family members - if they all tend to be slim, smaller builds, it may just be simple genetics. I got lucky, I have the small build, I just have regular old XY chromosomes though.

[debrahelen]

I am finding it surprisingly difficult buying a top...

I can barely get the length, and then there are the shoulders... and don't get me started on the sleeve lengths.

Any suggestions?

I've had good luck with tops at Long Tall Sally stores - they are cut for slightly broader shoulders and longer torsos.

[ChrissyRyan]

I am finding it surprisingly difficult buying a top...

I can barely get the length, and then there are the shoulders... and don't get me started on the sleeve lengths.

Any suggestions?

I
I know what you are saying.  I am not sure what can be done about the shoulder issue, and the lengths simply vary.  Tunic tops are longer than regular tops. 

Sometimes you have a gorgeous top with sleeves that are not long enough.
If you can layer it with a 3/4 sleeve or maybe even a full sleeve sweater on top, you can get a nice layered, roll-up sleeve look.  Or just wear the top with rolled-up sleeves.  Yes, I know that is not the look one always desires, and it does not work with every kind of top.

The sweater can make a nice layered look if the top underneath is hanging below the sweater,  down to perhaps in the back to the top of the rear end and in front a few inches, or with the top tucked in.

Chrissy

[Linde]

I am pretty lucky!  It seems that almost any op of XL size will fit me perfect, shoulders and length of arm are almost always correct for me.  In bottoms anything L or 14 will fit me well.  14 is almost a little large, and I need a belt to hold it up.

[Dani]

Oversize fashions are one way of getting clothes that fit.

But for me, I have found that stretchy tops like t-shirts, fit very well without much trouble.  The same applies to shorts and skirts. I look for clothes with just a small amount of stretch, it does not have to be super stretch to get a good fit.

[Wendi]

I've had good experiences buying my blouses at Kohls. Dana Buchman blouses seem to fit me very well. They are 3/4 length sleeves.