Re: The Stephanie Chronicles 2.0

[Kendra]

It certainly changed my life.  There's a sharp dividing line in all my photographs, and that's the day I had this done. 

And Stephanie I'm glad you are settled back in and un-time zoned.  Quite the trip, huh?

[davina61]

That's my girl!!! Must say I am lucky and don't need any ffs , got picked up to go shopping with my auntie etc and waited on kerb . My auntie said I looked just like her daughter (my cousin) Heal quickly dear and let the inner Steph roar.XXXXXX

[Donica]

Yes that person in the mirror is you lady! As Michelle stated in her post, "You have arrived GIRL!"

Congratulations Stephanie!

[Jessica]

Stephanie, I've been dealing with my own issues lately and just caught up with your thread.
I'm so happy things are going so well for you!  You are a lady that's not waiting and ready to live life at its fullest.

Hugs and smiles from a California girl

[steph2.0]

"I'm not bragging, just voicing my surprise that I now understand why I wasn't misgendered on my trip. She was there looking back at me, and he is fading."

No need to apologize!  You look beautiful!!

Thank you so much, Judi. As you know, it's hardly possible to hear that too much.

Stephanie

[davina61]

Just for you !! You look beautiful XXXXXXX

[steph2.0]

FFS is the real Gender Affirmation Surgery, as far as I am concerned.  It has had a huge impact on my life.  @Stephanie, I bet it does the same for you.

I agree wholeheartedly, Michelle. Initially I thought GCS was the most important thing for me, and I still think I require it to be complete. But FFS corrects what we openly present to the world, and dictates the way we're treated by it. If I were forced to pick only one, FFS would win.

Now 16 days post-op and I'm able to breathe a tiny bit better today. Another bundle of stitches came out of my nose, so they continued to be absorbed on schedule. Still quite swollen, but in profile I can definitely see it doesn't protrude as far as it did. I think they may have been slightly too conservative in the lip lift. It doesn't have quite the shape I was hoping for after they removed 5mm of my upper lip, but Dr. Bellinga says it may lift a little more as the swelling goes down. I'm almost certain that the grafts are longer than when they implanted them, so I'm overjoyed they're not going to shed, and will grow out immediately. My eyelids feel a little weird and probably will for a while until the swelling and scars go down. Generally speaking, though, considering the minimal work done (no bone work) I'm increasingly happy with the outcome.

I still don't have the nerve to try for male-fail, though. Maybe some day when the swelling is down. I'll be sure to have emotional support nearby in case it doesn't work.

BTW, Michelle, I think you look cute!

Stephanie

[steph2.0]

It certainly changed my life.  There's a sharp dividing line in all my photographs, and that's the day I had this done. 

And Stephanie I'm glad you are settled back in and un-time zoned.  Quite the trip, huh?

I hope you don't mind, but to illustrate why I wanted to do this at FacialTeam, yesterday I showed your before-and-after to my therapist. He was floored, as anyone who sees them would be. Of course, my changes can't possibly compare to yours, but I think I'll do okay anyhow.

As for in-time-zoned, nuh-uh. Not yet. I thought I was, and after my therapist appointment in Orlando yesterday, I attended the Orlando T-Network Christmas get-together. But by 8:30 I was completely exhausted, to the point that I considered myself unfit to drive the 1 1/2 hours back home. I left my car there and ended up crashing at @SassyCassie's house last night. That wasn't my original intention, but golly gosh darn heck I had to stay with my Bestie again.

As for Europe: oh my gosh, what a trip. It was seriously another major milestone in my life. As I mentioned multiple times, I've led a pretty quiet, circumscribed, frugal life until now. I'd never been to the European continent, never been to a country with a different language, and never expected to ever see those things that to me only existed in pictures. The whirlwind tour we took wasn't a pace I could sustain for long, but wow, I am so glad we did it. I can't thank you enough for sharing it all with me. I repeat back to you a line you confusingly used to me: "You're awesome!"

Stephanie

[steph2.0]

That's my girl!!! Must say I am lucky and don't need any ffs , got picked up to go shopping with my auntie etc and waited on kerb . My auntie said I looked just like her daughter (my cousin) Heal quickly dear and let the inner Steph roar.XXXXXX

Thank you Davina.

*ROAR!*

[steph2.0]

Yes that person in the mirror is you lady! As Michelle stated in her post, "You have arrived GIRL!"

Congratulations Stephanie!

Thank you so much, Donica. I'm not sure I've arrived yet, but I do think I can see my destination just around the bend. [emoji4]

Stephanie

[steph2.0]

I'm so happy things are going so well for you!  You are a lady that's not waiting and ready to live life at its fullest.

Hiya Jessica! Thank you for dropping in. As for not waiting, time's a'wastin'! I lost a half century, and I've got a lot to do yet. I don't have a formal bucket list, and there's hardly a point. The list would be shorter if I just wrote down what I've done so far in my life. Within certain limits, I want to see, feel, do, and be it all! @Kendra gave me my first lesson.

Stephanie

[steph2.0]

Just for you !! You look beautiful XXXXXXX

Davina! You're making me blush! [emoji3526]

(More please [emoji16])

Stephanie

[KathyLauren]

Staphanie, I am so glad that you are happy with the results of your surgery so far.  It will only get better as you continue to heal completely.  Keep on rockin', sister!

[Donica]

Sweet hugs lady!!!

[KathyLauren]

Merry Christmas, Stephanie!

[steph2.0]

Merry Christmas to all my dear friends.

I haven't got much time to write a lot. For the first time in 60 years my Mom's oldest daughter is cooking Christmas dinner for her. Honey Baked ham, homemade cookies, homemade applesauce, homemade sweet potatoes, and lots of homemade love.

As you may have read in @SassyCassie's thread, we celebrated our first Christmas together over the weekend. It was deeply emotional on so many different levels and for so many different reasons, but the love was everywhere to absorb.

We started out shopping on Saturday until we were tired and hurting in a Yiddish sort of way.


After a wonderful home cooked pot roast dinner (Cassie is a wondrous chef) we decorated our first tree together (the first of many).


Both Cassie and I were wearing our "Pleiades House" necklaces, and I realized something as we started decorating the tree. It's hard to see in the picture, but just by coincidence it turned out that the ornaments we had were pink and baby blue which perfectly matched the colors in our necklaces - the colors of the trans flag. So along with everything else, our tree also represents the trans journey of us and all of our sisters and brothers here.

We had special ornaments to represent ourselves.


Sunday morning we had a good breakfast then enjoyed the warmth of the fireplace and each other's company while we nommed on both my and @Jessica_Rose's homebaked cookies.


After we opened our deeply meaningful gifts (with a fair number of happy tears), we shared a yummy dinner, then took some pictures under the mistletoe. One picture doesn't do the occasion justice, so here are my favorites.




Here is our Merry Christmas picture to all.


Back home yesterday I ran to the store and enjoyed the simple pleasure of just being me out in the world, being treated as my true self. Being called by the correct pronouns and bantering with the cashier.

In the kitchen I made another batch of cookies with my new mixer (stand back, these can be dangerous in the wrong hands, and mine are definitely the wrong ones)...


... and relived the joy of licking the beaters (without having to share with my sister!)


My new aprons came in - one for me and one for mom.


Hmm. Well, it seems I wrote a lot anyway. Okay, time to get ready! Merry Christmas everyone!!

Stephanie

[Donica]

Such a cute couple! You two are so sweat! Merry Christmas to you both Stephanie. And you mom too!

[steph2.0]

Christmas dinner with Mom went wonderfully. Everything I cooked came out the way I'd hoped. Even the crescent rolls, which I'd forgotten in the oven after I turned it off, came out nice and tan and soft. It felt so good to give back a fraction of what I'd received for the last 60 years. I had bought two matching aprons so she could help her daughter a little in the kitchen.


Omm nomm nomm with Momm.


While her hubby still has problems with names a pronouns, there is definite progress, since every time he made a mistake he immediately apologized and corrected himself. Mom got it right almost every time.

After dinner, a nap for the old folks, and dessert, we got out the cards for another tradition, euchre. Mom commented that we could no longer play boys against girls, and her hubby was now badly outnumbered by the women.

The obligatory family picture.


As they got ready to go I remembered a special card I'd meant to give her earlier. I had shed a few tears when I picked it out (with help from my bestie), and there were more when I gave it to her. She gave me a long hug and told me, "It's beautiful, just like you." I'm getting verklempt just thinking about it. I saw her out to the car, and dripped a few more tears as we talked about how rough the upcoming year may be for a variety of reasons. There were more "I love you's" and they were on their way.

I have so many emotions flowing around and through me as I think about the family relationships I know about. I'm incredibly sad for those who have lost their families for any number of reasons, though being rejected for allowing themselves to be themselves is the saddest. I admit to a twinge of envy for those who have had joyful and deeply touching reconnections with family that had been distant. But the thought that's overwhelming me at the moment is luck. I am so fortunate to have had a good, though previously arm's-length relationship with my Mom and sister, and to have it actually strengthened by my transition. I don't know whether it's because I've come out of a shell and been willing to share my whole self with them, or whether it's the newfound ability to communicate woman-to-woman, or both - or none of the above. All I know at this point is that when it comes to family, I'm happy today, and tomorrow looks good, too. That's enough.


Stephanie

[Stevi]

Stephanie,

I am so pleased to hear that you had such a good day with your Mom.  Good to see Sue's smile in those photos.  Our wishes for a Merry Christmas seemed to have done there magic both today and over the past weekend.

Now, onward to a Happy New Year!

All the best to you,
Stevi

[Northern Star Girl]

@Steph2.0
Dear Stephanie:
Your recent updates are a pleasure to read and it is a treat for me to see the pictures you posted.

Celebrating Christmas over last weekend with @SassyCassie looked like you two had a wonderful time together. The Christmas Tree that  both of you decorated looks very beautiful.  The picture of you two is a picture of smiles and happiness for sure.

Your Christmas Day and dinner time with your MOM was certainly an affirming time for you... your acceptance and your mom's interaction with you is something than many transitioners only dream about.

For some, the Christmas holiday time can be stressful and difficult to deal with because of strained family relationships and lack of acceptance from our family members.   Count youself fortunate for sure.

Again, thank you for posting your good news.

I hope and trust that you and Cassie are finding the joy and happiness that you both deserve.   

I wish you a very MERRY CHRISTMAS
and a prosperous and Happy NEW YEAR 

Hugs and as always, Well Wishes
Danielle