getting a hysto isn't that easy unfortunately. My age is against me unless it's got a problem.
now of course IF they'll do this damn scan and find out yep, it IS screwed and removing it is the best course (it's the only cure for the condition my specialist thinks I have) then i'll get put on a wait list but going in and asking for one? they won't give it to you just because you ask. Problem is, they can also buy you time with hormones and i'm worried they'll try to pull that ol' nonsense because "oh you're young" and ignore the fact I already HAVE children, i'm DONE having children, I cannot have more children anyway (husband has had the snip and i'm infertile because my ovaries don't work ffs).
seriously, it's a really common problem with people trying to get hysterectomies over here. Doctors all "but you'll regret it!" as if we're supposed to just keep pumping out babies till we hit menopause or something.
Eugh.
So gross.
and sure it IS risky surgery, but if there's something wrong leaving it will just mean it gets worse. Endometriosis doesn't magically go away, it spreads. it spreads and it causes organ adhesion and it can do a lot of damage.
It's BAD.
but they won't take my ovaries because "you need those for hormones" or some crap. I won't be able to get those removed till i'm on hrt and that's a very... very... very long wait (it's 2 years to even speak to the GIC and then at least another year before they'll give you hormones)
Just getting the uterus out will stop periods sure, but it won't stop the pms. That's all on my ovaries.
however, metformin might solve that issue at least partially by reigning in the estrogen and stopping it from flooding my system. Because right now it literally IS poisioning me by overwhelming everything.
Everything is just so painfully SLOW and I just feel so powerless. I can't stand it.
Like, why can't they just give me medication NOW? Why continue to do more pointless tests that just waste time and tell them stuff we already know?
THIS right here is why people self medicate. Because our doctors won't listen and won't help.
My nurse appointment isn't till the 3rd for the glucose and lipid and testosterone tests and private doc won't give me meds till that's sorted (and it'll take like 2 weeks to get those results back because the nhs moves at a glacial pace)
So i'm looking at at LEAST another month of this nonsense and im honestly at breaking point.
Nothing changes, nothing ever happens. I just get more hurdles, more road blocks thrown up in front of me and I just haven't got the strength left to keep doing it.
It shouldnt' be such a fight to be well but it is. It always is.
And i'm just feeling really overwhelmed and horribly depressed.
My mental health had been doing so well lately too, but this is too much for even my antidepressants to counteract. It's just to many years of the same old nonsense over and over and over again. The same fight and the same result. There's only so many times you can fail before you just give up you know?
I'm SO tired.
I don't want to live in this body any more.
