Allie's Blog IV: Revenge of Allie's Blog

[Northern Star Girl]

@imallie
Dear Allie
I got a positive reaction and a chuckle out of one of your previous statements:

    "When the boy came out he also had no idea who we were, and
    then came up to me and just asked if I wanted to play."

HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

[imallie]

Tales from a trans marriage - #50326:

A stop at Whole Foods after dinner for some quick shopping (we were at the beach this weekend, so we didn't have time for regular groceries).

Since it's not a great time for me, migraine-wise, I was admittedly a bit impaired... so when I was looking for a whole watermelon, and ... you know... round things roll? Yeah, a giant watermelon rolled out of the big bucket and exploded on the ground.

I was horrified. And I expected the typical dirty looks and grunts and all that.

Instead, I immediately got two really sweet staff members coming over and saying "oh, that's ok" and "we got this"... and "hey, that's dinner for us now!" And generally just making me feel like it was no big deal.

It was VERY surprising.

When my wife joined the crime scene, with a "what chaos did you create now — I left you for 30 seconds?" Look on her face... I just pointed at the carnage and smiled.

But afterwards, she had to drag me away as I kept wanting to go to the egg aisle. I wanted to keep testing my new superpower.. 😘

———-

Next, we were getting our proteins, and she told me to get the pork tenderloin... and to "use your little blonde magic" and get the butcher to cut off the silver skin.

I said ok. A little smile, and I asked sweetly.. and the butcher spent a couple of minutes trimming it closely and said "anytime!".

My wife shook her head and laughed as I returned to the cart with a sh*t eating grin on my face.

[davina61]

Just watch out for the Kryptonite!!! (or pushing your luck) . Yes officer, (fluttering eye lids) I will get that tail light sorted and still get a ticket-----------

[imallie]

Just watch out for the Kryptonite!!! (or pushing your luck) . Yes officer, (fluttering eye lids) I will get that tail light sorted and still get a ticket-----------

😂

Yes, that would be a particularly sticky wicket for me to navigate! Nearly all the officers in our town were kids who grew up going to school and on baseball teams with our son — so we know them (and they know/knew the old me), and one of their fathers who we know really well, a retired cop from another town, now works part-time in town.

So I REALLY don't think any of those things are going to work with the police for me. 😉

[Maid Marion]

That is why folks like to shop at upscale markets like Whole Foods. 
They hire enough staff to meet the needs of the customers! 
The butcher can spend five minutes with you and not feel he needs to do nsomething else!

This is the complaint of the local Target. 
They don't provide enough cashiers or working self-service registers so there are long lines.
They have plenty of people stocking the shelves, but they don't know how to work the registers.
If it is busy I'll just come back later. As well as avoid known busy times, mid day yesterday.
I had ice cream at Stew Leonards, but decided it was too busy to buy anything else!  So I left and went to Home Depot and Kohl's, where they stores were empty of shoppers!

[Oldandcreaky]

I too wield Allie's superpower, but only when I first brush my hair. It's like Bruce Banner getting mad before battle.

[imallie]

I too wield Allie's superpower, but only when I first brush my hair. It's like Bruce Banner getting mad before battle.

Just so you know, in order to just but a bow on your analogy, the Hulk was originally grey, not green.  In fact he would have stayed that way permanently were it not for an early printing error which turned him green in an early issue. It was wildly popular so Stan Lee rolled with it. 

Love,
Allie (your friendly neighborhood comic geek)

[Oldandcreaky]

I did not know that. I am the Hulk and you are a true believer. Nuff said.

[imallie]

I did not know that. I am the Hulk and you are a true believer. Nuff said.

Very much so, on both counts.

You ARE the hulk - sometimes misunderstood, mostly just want to be left alone, but full of great heart and warmth ... but, you know, also can destroy a village without even thinking about it if someone really does you or those you love wrong. 😘

[imallie]

So when we were picking up a few items at the grocery store in RI on Saturday, I inadvertently bought "sea salt and vinegar" Pop Chips... because they look exactly like regular "Sea Salt" Pop Chips — but since in RI "S&V" chips pretty much ARE regular, that's how they roll. As my wife said when she saw what I did - "You got Rhode Islanded!"

Anyway, this morning I made myself an egg and cheese wrap for breakfast. And after I finished I realized that I should have crushed up some of those chip inside right after the cheese melted. That would have been legit.

So much so that all evening I've been thinking about that, and how now I have to make the exact same breakfast again tomorrow, just so I can correct that mistake and try it — otherwise my brain will itch and it will drive me crazy.

And THAT, dear friends, is a little extra special glimpse into how my weird little 'ol noggin works. I gave up questioning it long ago. It's just how it goes!

[imallie]

Oh and IN ADDITION to the chips (not "aside" from those chips -- that whole things is NOT to be tossed aside...)

Took care of a few other things today...

Had a catch up with my therapist (always productive!), and she's now starting the first letter I need (of two) for bottom surgery. Need the first one, among other things, to schedule the consult so this is a big part of getting the ball rolling (pun very much intended)...

Also got word that Amex accepted my temp license of proof of new ID. So the website is now updated with my new info, and I got notice that a new card is en route....

Wife and I pulled the trigger and booked that two-week all-inclusive for next April. There was a small delay when we went back and forth as to who was going to hit the "confirm" button. I think we both wanted the other to do it, since it was quite pricey and NOT pressing the button gives you plausible deniability. So says she who did NOT press said button. 

I think there were a few others when I started typing this... but my pain meds are kicking in and my headache is ramping up... so whatever thoughts were on my train of thought clearly got off at the last stop.

Love,
Allie

[Oldandcreaky]

Thanks for all the updates, Allie. One of my favorite things about the two of you is how you both get a kick out of the social shifts. Even after 40 years, I still do too.

You and your wife could coach floundering or uncertain couples, coach them to chuckle at the changes, to use them to their advantage, and to, above all, keep their cool. You just won't know what the new normal will be and having a haughty certainty is silly.

I used to study and teach the idea that all groups prefer stasis, even when stasis doesn't serve the group. For example, a woman will stay with her abuser when he bloodies her, again and again. A world will continue burning carbon even as the seas rise and deluges fall from the sky. And some couples with a trans-mate will continue plowing asphalt, as if that's the way to cultivate.

[imallie]

Thanks for all the updates, Allie. One of my favorite things about the two of you is how you both get a kick out of the social shifts. Even after 40 years, I still do too.

You and your wife could coach floundering or uncertain couples, coach them to chuckle at the changes, to use them to their advantage, and to, above all, keep their cool. You just won't know what the new normal will be and having a haughty certainty is silly.

I used to study and teach the idea that all groups prefer stasis, even when stasis doesn't serve the group. For example, a woman will stay with her abuser when he bloodies her, again and again. A world will continue burning carbon even as the seas rise and deluges fall from the sky. And some couples with a trans-mate will continue plowing asphalt, as if that's the way to cultivate.

I think we are really good at knowing what's most important at the core - which is that we are deeply in love and each other's best friend. So everything else is kind of just noise.   Some stuff is just life, and we take that as a daily adventure —- some things we just laugh at, or roll our eyes at, etc... but nothing touches that core principle.

I'd imagine by the way, that those who had you as a professor quote you incessantly throughout their life. Everyone has a few teachers like that.

 

[imallie]

Two morning notes, presented in order of importance (to me, right now. I do not believe the ranking will last all day. But right now, 100%)

1. Egg white and cheese Omlet with salt & vinegar chips? 🔥 (and my brain feels SO much better!)


2. Just checked USPS informed delivery, and was shocked to see that my new driver's license is in today's mail. They said 4-6 weeks. This is one week later.

I imagine it will be emotional to open. NEARLY as emotional as the first bite of the Omlet, as pictured above. 🙄😉

[imallie]

So, folks... as you know, I post stuff about my baking and cooking. And for those of you who do neither... maybe sometimes you think, "well, that's too much work." Or "I don't have the skills to do that."

Well let me share this story from this morning to make you feel better and prove that ANYONE can bake/cook... It just takes a bit of practice and paying attention.

Like, when I was making my famous Lemon Blueberry muffins? Which I've made many many times before? Well, we were out of freeze-dried blueberries (which I use as a second source of BBs), but I pivoted to frozen wild blueberries — and reduced the liquids a bit — no problem!

But then in preheating the two ovens to 375? I, apparently, set one over to "bake" and another to "broil" — PROBLEM.

Broiled muffins are no bueno. The are a lot more like a blueberry muffin soup. A crunchy top and a gloppy muffin sludge underneath.

Now, Allie, you say, are you spending all morning looking out the window waiting for the mail truck to come with your license and maybe a bit distracted? First of all, please stop interrupting me when I'm talking to people, and second of all... hmmmm, maybe you have a point. But still, that was rude.  We'll talk later...

Anyway, the point is, bake, cook, give stuff a try! Everyone messes up ... a lot! But eventually you'll learn to nail at least one thing. And once you see people enjoy something you make, you'll be hooked and want to learn how make something else, and so on...

Just learn the difference between "bake" and "broil." — it's super meaningful, apparently.

Waiting for Chuck (the mail carrier)
Allie

[Jessica_Rose]

Sometimes a 'mistake' can be even better than the intended outcome. If I remember correctly, the first batch of chocolate chip cookies was a mistake. The baker expected the chocolate to melt and disperse throughout each cookie, not remain relatively intact. Experimentation and 'mistakes' are the source of many wonderful creations. Failing at something isn't a bad thing. Never trying is.

Love always -- Jess

[Lori Dee]

@imallie

I love your stories. You never fail to put a smile on my face.

Today will be a day of celebration. Congratulations on your new driver's license!

[imallie]

Sometimes a 'mistake' can be even better than the intended outcome. If I remember correctly, the first batch of chocolate chip cookies was a mistake. The baker expected the chocolate to melt and disperse throughout each cookie, not remain relatively intact. Experimentation and 'mistakes' are the source of many wonderful creations. Failing at something isn't a bad thing. Never trying is.

Love always -- Jess

Ooh I don't think I'd ever heard that Jess. I just love love LOVE days when I get a little smarter, don't you? Thanks to you, I'm all set for today! 😘

[imallie]

@imallie

I love your stories. You never fail to put a smile on my face.

Today will be a day of celebration. Congratulations on your new driver's license!

Thanks Lori! Yeah I'm really looking forward to seeing this. Chuck is normally here by around noon, unless he's on vacation and we're getting faux-Chuck - and then who knows when it will arrive.

[Oldandcreaky]

C'mon, Chuck, don't leave a lady waiting!