The Story of Lori

[Lori Dee]

Thanks, Allie!

I will give that a shot. I am using my phone and zoomed in because it has a macro feature. I can always crop the excess background instead.

Oh, BTW, in my Voice Training class this morning I relayed your "sneeze story". My coach said it is wonderful that you have that immediate feedback available. (NOT GOOD! from the other room.)

She said sneezing and coughing are two of our most difficult challenges because they are reflex actions. So if you are getting "Good Job!" from the other room, you are doing very well.

Good job!
@imallie

[Lori Dee]

Voice Training went well without any issues.

Of course, the fire alarm guy never showed up, so the test never happened. {Sigh}

[Jessica_Rose]

Voice Training went well without any issues.

Of course, the fire alarm guy never showed up, so the test never happened. {Sigh}

Glad to hear the voice training sessions are going well. They start off slow, and it may take several sessions before you begin to notice anything. Like most things, practice helps.

As for the fire alarm test, maybe it was a silent alarm?

Love always -- Jess

[Lori Dee]

@Jessica_Rose

I am getting comfortable with speaking and catching myself so I can adjust. Now my coach wants me to practice reading aloud and talking on the phone. She told me jokingly to start making prank calls. 
Actually, the test is to call local businesses and ask simple questions like when they are open, what is their price for {whatever}, and see if I am gendered correctly.

I just saw the fire alarm guy in the hallway at 1:30. He is walking around with a clipboard. Maybe he is looking for a clock because he obviously doesn't know when 10:00 a.m. is. 

[imallie]

Thanks, Allie!

I will give that a shot. I am using my phone and zoomed in because it has a macro feature. I can always crop the excess background instead.

Oh, BTW, in my Voice Training class this morning I relayed your "sneeze story". My coach said it is wonderful that you have that immediate feedback available. (NOT GOOD! from the other room.)

She said sneezing and coughing are two of our most difficult challenges because they are reflex actions. So if you are getting "Good Job!" from the other room, you are doing very well.

Good job!
@imallie

Yeah, you have that split second to think about it!

As for voice? It's funny.. one of my friends who I speak to every day asked me about that. He asked if my voice was going to change. And I told him that I'd been changing it slightly over the last year or so, so he really hadn't noticed... but that I did reflexively change it now when I'm dressed... my wife picked up on that.

It was actually something my vocal coach used to tell me we were done. I had forgotten I had to start some slow cooking thing for dinner really early that morning, so I apologized to him but I had to do it while we were starting our session.

And after a few minutes he started laughing and said "do you realize you've been doing the voice this whole time, while you've been cooking?" And I did not. That's when he said. "You're all set."

And now it's the same thing, it was only that first day when I went out dressed that my wife said I was altering my voice, and I didn't really notice it.  So... I promise you Lori, it'll sort of become second nature really fast!

I was able to show my friend the little change it takes to alter it... adding more air, making the voice feel like it's coming from my throat and face, not my chest... but things you do automatically.

Oh and one thing that my coach did that I find still really helpful. We landed on a sentence ... one that automatically pops me into my voice. For me it's "I want to tell you a secret."  Because it makes me think of being a bit more quiet, adding a bit of inflection and air... and once I do that, I'm off to the races.

Anyway, so so glad you're finally doing the training... especially knowing how much you've been wanting to!!!!

[Lori Dee]

"I want to tell you a secret."

I love it. I have found that if I start right, I can keep it going. I used "Good morning" or "Hello" as a starter because they are short. I like the secret. That has everything. Thanks!
 

[ChrissyRyan]

"You have got this Chris" is my thought that helps me with talking more femininely.

I am going to lunch with the a couple of CIS female friends today.  They have always been nice to me.  I am not sure why they have understood my transition so well.  We almost never talk about me transitioning now.  I am just accepted as another woman by them, as far as I know. 

Chrissy

[Lori Dee]

Another busy day today.

It's raining and the forecast says rain for the next five days. My mining buddy is hoping the creek will run fast enough to erode the bottom a bit. Then when we get there later all the gold will be just sitting there waiting for us to scoop it up.

The first-ever Pride Parade in Rapid City happens tomorrow. I'm not certain how the rain will affect it, or the turnout. I need a Pride Rainbow-colored rain jacket. 

I paid my rent then I had to do some grocery shopping. I try to keep it under $200. Today's total was $245, but I got a new ceramic-lined cookware set that accounts for $60 of it. So it really was under $200. That's right, I am now the proud owner of a Dutch Oven! I haven't had one in about ten years. Funny I never missed it.

I also splurged and got some movies. One new Blu-Ray and two DVD sets. One is a six-movie collection of Children of the Corn. That should keep me off the streets at night... for a week or so. But nine movies total for less than $25 is not a bad deal.

I have a couple of people who have asked for jewelry pieces and I was able to get more wire today. I'll work on those while it's too wet to go outside.

All of this doing takes a lot of energy, so I am now replenishing with chocolate donuts for lunch.   

[ChrissyRyan]

Does the real gold look bright and shiny when you find it?

Chrissy

[Lori Dee]

Yes, it is unmistakable. I love the way it shines when sunlight hits it.

Did you check out my photo album on my website?
The website is Lori Dee's Corner

I have three photo albums there. Two for rock hounding and my Gold Gallery.

[Lori Dee]

Happy Pride Day!

The weather has cleared and the first-ever Pride Parade in Rapid City will begin in five minutes. I won't be participating due to... issues. I will try to post pics if I can get some. Our local newspaper hides everything behind a paywall.

On the first of each month, I do a "Progress Check". I weigh myself and measure my bust, underbust (ribs), waist, and hips. Being the nerd that I am, I enter these on a spreadsheet so I can graph my progress. The spreadsheet is also where I record my dosage and estradiol levels for comparison.

This has been amazingly helpful because I can point to a specific point in time and say, "Here is where the problem started", or "Here is where progress was being made". My doctor can then cross-reference my medical records to verify what I am seeing. This enabled me to show my doctor that the generic Mylan patch was not working, that the oral tablets were not working, and that I was making progress when I first went on the Grove brand patches. This in turn got the Pharmacist to place a special order so that I will only be prescribed Grove brand patches until my doctor changes something.

So what has happened since April 1st when I started the Grove brand patches?
From April 1 to May 1, I lost 9 lbs. I lost 1/4 inch from my bustline (negligible), one inch from underbust, 1/2 inch from my waist, and 1 inch from my hips. Considering almost ten pounds lost, all of that makes sense.

From May 1 - June 1 I lost no weight at all. But I lost almost two inches (1.75") from my bust (Unacceptable), 1/2 inch from underbust, 1/2 inch from waist, and no change in hips.

I know that our weight and mesurements will change daily, even throughout the day. In my Hypnotherapy practice, I would tell my weight-control clients not to weigh themselves every day. Once a week, on the same day, at the same time of day will give more accurate results. I follow the same rules except I do it once a month.

A half-inch plus or minus is nothing I worry about. Weight fluctuations, or maybe I held the measuring tape a little differently, things happen. A one-inch difference makes me examine where did it go? Was I exercising more? Eating right? How does one measurement compare to the others? Did I lose weight in all areas? (The boobs are always the first to go).

But if I am gaining weight, or even holding steady, and losing inches I begin to question what is going on. Today I have been struggling with my frustration and depression, and today's weigh-in results didn't help. But on Monday morning I see my Psychologist and then right after I get labs drawn to check my hormone levels. Based upon how I feel and my spreadsheet numbers I am willing to bet my levels are still too low. I have been taking my vitamins twice daily, so they can't blame them.

We will see what happens. The struggle continues.

[Lori Dee]

With mental health issues (stress, frustration, depression, anxiety, etc.) there are three things you can do to feel better.

1. Change your thinking. It really is that simple. Just think about something else. Bonus points if it is something that interest you and unrelated to the issue that is triggering you.
2. Change your activity. Do something else. A hobby, read a book, listen to music, take a bubble bath, paint your nails, practice your makeup skills, play a video game.
3. Change your environment. Go for a walk, "touch grass", talk to a neighbor, visit a museum, sit in your yard, visit Nature.

You can actually do all three at the same time. Take a hike while listening to music. Take a bubble bath while reading a book. I love being out in Nature. It recharges my soul. It can be as simple as watching the hawk flying overhead, listening to the robins, or looking at wildflowers.





See? It's working already.

[Gina P]

I find my belly is the first to go and makes the boobs look bigger by comparison. Most of my weight has been accumulating on my thighs. I guess that is a common place for women. Weight cycling can be a real thing. Loose some then gain it back and with the help of the hormones goes to more female locations.

[ChrissyRyan]

With mental health issues (stress, frustration, depression, anxiety, etc.) there are three things you can do to feel better.

1. Change your thinking. It really is that simple. Just think about something else. Bonus points if it is something that interest you and unrelated to the issue that is triggering you.
2. Change your activity. Do something else. A hobby, read a book, listen to music, take a bubble bath, paint your nails, practice your makeup skills, play a video game.
3. Change your environment. Go for a walk, "touch grass", talk to a neighbor, visit a museum, sit in your yard, visit Nature.

You can actually do all three at the same time. Take a hike while listening to music. Take a bubble bath while reading a book. I love being out in Nature. It recharges my soul. It can be as simple as watching the hawk flying overhead, listening to the robins, or looking at wildflowers.





See? It's working already.

So pretty flowers!

Chrissy

[Lori Dee]

I don't know what the yellow one is, but the pink/purple one is called Dame's Rocket. One of the residents in my building is from Scotland and she said they call it Sweet Rocket. At night, they smell like perfume.

[Lori Dee]

Recently we have been discussing things over on the Personal Safety thread. Normally, I don't worry too much about it because I am confident that I can handle most situations.

Then SafeHome.org released their report ranking all US states on how LGBTQ+ friendly they are. The report is based upon LGBTQ+ legislation (restricting rights, protecting rights, etc.) and the FBI database on hate crime. NBC News Article

The safest places to live are:

#1: Rhode Island
#2: New Hampshire
#3: Delaware
#4: Alaska
#5: Hawaii

The absolute worst places to live are:

#1: South Dakota
#2: Florida
#3: Wyoming
#4: Ohio
#5: Alabama

Really? South Dakota is worse than Texas? Worse than Florida? Of course, the media is focused on how Florida is the second-worst, only casually mentioning that SD is even more unsafe. Yeah, let's talk about Florida. Nobody cares about the Midwest.

I knew SD was a conservative state. I am mostly conservative in my views on many things. When I was researching where to move to, (I wanted to leave IL really bad), I looked at things like the cost of living, crime rate, unemployment rate, housing costs, etc. LGBTQ-friendliness was not on my radar because I had no idea that I was transgender.

When Kristi Noem became Governor, things began to change here... for the worse. I liked her when she was our Congresswoman. As a governor, she thinks she is the Queen and news reports repeatedly expose her corruption. But no one seems to care. You know it is bad when the Sioux Nation has banned her from setting foot on any of the Reservations in South Dakota.

Yesterday was Rapid City's first Pride Parade. The media announced it beforehand. But no mention of it in the news yesterday or today. Did they not have any reporters there? Did no one take any pictures? Why the silence?

It seems I picked a bad place to get diagnosed with Gender Dysphoria. (Like I had any choice). I could move to a more friendly state, but I can't afford the cost of living on a fixed income. It's not like I can get a pay raise or anything.

I am meeting with a VSO (Veteran Services Officer) this month to re-evaluate my VA disability. When I first applied for veteran disability back in 1990, I was told that there was no compensation for service-connected tinnitus. The policy has changed since then and living on a tank for almost 15 years certainly covers the service-connected part. If my claim is approved, my disability rating will increase by 10%. That doesn't sound like much, but it will put another $200 per month in my pocket.

With a little extra income each month, I can get a nice used vehicle...

and "live in a van down by the river".

[Lori Dee]

I'm back from my appointment with my VA Psychologist. She is truly a wonderful person. She is working on a recommendation for Gender Affirming Surgery. Although the VA won't do it, her report documents a long history of Gender Dysphoria and that HRT alone has been unsuccessful as a treatment.

After the appointment, I had the lab draw blood to check my Estradiol level. I have been on the new Grove brand patches since April, so I should be finally near my target level. But based on how I feel and my June 1st measurements, I still believe the results will be too low.

I see my Gynecologist in two weeks. The lab results will be back by then, so we can discuss why I am so dissatisfied with my progress. I will also ask her to do her version of a surgery recommendation. Then in August, I will talk to my Primary and try to get a recommendation from her too.

Even though the VA currently does not cover Gender Affirming Surgery, that could change. There is currently a lawsuit against the VA by TAVA (Transgender American Veterans Association) to change this discriminatory policy. If the lawsuit fails, I can use the recommendations from my doctors to pursue surgery through Medicare.

So, yet again, I am standing by to stand by. *sigh*

[Lori Dee]

Today's Motivational Message:



Straighten your crown and have a great day!

[Northern Star Girl]

@LoriDee
Dear Lori:

EXCELLENT motivational message.   
              Thank you for sharing.

HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

[ChrissyRyan]

Everyday try to think positive thoughts.

Chrissy