Is detransitioning always the wise decision?

[CosmicJoke]

Hi everyone. I believe it has happened where some people may have been led to believe that they are transgender and transitioning was what was right for them. Maybe they end up finding out it was something else so they detransition. In this case that was the right decision for them.
I think maybe there are other times people do it but then it turns out to be a mistake. I'm sure it has happened alot of times. Maybe when you see how you are treated as a woman you think "it's so much easier just to be a man" and vice versa.
My question is just that. Is detransitioning always the wise decision?

[Northern Star Girl]

@CosmicJoke

You are missing additional wording in the subject title of
your topic "Is detransitioning always the wise decision?"

The other question that should be stated in this topic and thread is:
      "Is transitioning always the wise decision?"

A wise decision for one person may not be a wise decision for another.

The answer that one gives is very dependent on personal desires and needs
plus the circumstances (and resultant consequences) that will involve health,
relationships, employment, finances, etc, etc.

Great question, however ... there is not an answer that fits everyone as you
so aptly stated in our original posting.

Your question is definitely food for thought and personal introspection.

Thank you for sharing and posting. 

Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Hi everyone. I believe it has happened where some people may have been led to believe that they are transgender and transitioning was what was right for them. Maybe they end up finding out it was something else so they detransition. In this case that was the right decision for them.
I think maybe there are other times people do it but then it turns out to be a mistake. I'm sure it has happened alot of times. Maybe when you see how you are treated as a woman you think "it's so much easier just to be a man" and vice versa.
My question is just that. Is detransitioning always the wise decision?

[Devlyn]

Danielle hit it right on the head. I'll just add that it's never anyone else's decision whether transitioning or not is right. People get to make their own decisions. We don't make decisions for them.

[ChrissyRyan]

This is as personal decision.

I see nothing wrong for someone to voluntarily seek out professional help in regards to transitioning or detransitioning.  You should be sure about which way to go!


Chrissy

[Maid Marion]

I think I was too short to benefit from male privilege.
In any case I routinely get more respect presenting as a woman!

[Devlyn]

Hi everyone. I believe it has happened where some people may have been led to believe that they are transgender and transitioning was what was right for them. Maybe they end up finding out it was something else so they detransition. In this case that was the right decision for them.
I think maybe there are other times people do it but then it turns out to be a mistake. I'm sure it has happened alot of times. Maybe when you see how you are treated as a woman you think "it's so much easier just to be a man" and vice versa.
My question is just that. Is detransitioning always the wise decision?

Are you detransitioning, or do you think you were erroneously led to believe that you were transgender? Because otherwise you're simply asking us to judge others, and I feel that would be extremely poor form.

[Jessica_K]

This is a subject I will not comment on

Jessica

[LoriDee]

I had an Endo tell me that a patient came to an appointment with her and announced that she was no longer transgender, and left without explanation. I assumed she meant she had completed her transition, but the Endo said sometimes people change their minds.

The whole purpose of the mental health evaluation is to determine if you are experiencing Gender Dysphoria. To what extent a transition one might pursue, is definitely a personal matter. But I don't understand how someone could be misdiagnosed and the "cause" is some other condition. How is that possible? Was the diagnoser incompetent?

I can understand someone changing their mind for a variety of reasons. Pressure from family or friends that they do not want to alienate. Or maybe, as CosmicJoke stated, maybe it is easier for them to not transition. In either case, the individual decided that any dysphoria was tolerable. Again, that is their personal decision, but does that make the diagnosis wrong?

As Chrissy stated, either way, a mental health evaluation should still be in order to determine the why behind their decision, and then to offer support to help them carry out their wishes.

[Sarah B]

Hi Everyone

Transitioning or DeTransitioning if one ever considers it.  Is up to that person and only that person.  The number of people detransitioning, without quoting numbers is very small.

So is it wise for those who want to detransition? Yes, and for those who want to transition (no I did not transition) is it wise? Yes.

In my early days on Susan's for the first time, I made the following post and you can click on the following link First Mention to see that post.

Over my dead body would I ever detransition.  However, thinking about being a male, thinking about what I once had, makes me feel sick to the core and I would rather die than become a man.

Recently in another similar thread I made the following statement:

. . . .

OK to be brutally honest there were two instances where I paused and considered what I was doing with my life, one was the consideration of de-transitioning. However, that was never going to fly in the face of it.  Why? I was standing in the middle of George Street, Sydney and I was thinking about others, that were considering reversing what they were doing and I thought what I had to do to achieve this, breast removal was one of the thoughts racing through my mind at the time. 

However, thinking about this, 30 seconds at most or a very short period of time, a sickening feeling came over me and I immediately and emphatically said no to myself about this.   There was no chance in hell, I was ever going back to the way that I lived and to this day thinking about how I lived makes me sick to the stomach, in other words it makes me very nauseous.

The other time where I considered the ramifications of what I was doing and possibly could of ended up not going ahead with the surgery, was on the day of my surgery. My friend at the time was driving my car and we arrived at the hospital and I sat there thinking about what lay ahead and realized that if I went ahead there was no turning back, but I only dwelt on these thoughts only for about a minute or so.

Actually my mind was basically blank at the time.  I already knew with out fear, what I was going to do, I did not know what the future was going to hold for me, not that I thought about that at the time, so I got out of the car and walked into the hospital and as they say, the rest is history. . . . .

You can click on the following link Second Mention to see that post.

As an aside.  Did I need 'therapy'?  No, although I had to do 'therapy' to get my letters. I had no gender or body dysphoria. Not that these two issues were ever discussed in my 'therapy' sessions.  I had no problems whatsoever.

I was living my life as a female, had my head screwed on correctly and that if I made a wrong decision then I was totally responsible for my actions.  That is what my psychiatrists saw and why I believe that I got my surgery letters.

Finally as I always have said, "I have never regretted what I have done" and "I will always be eternally grateful for my surgeon" and the part where he states in a letter; "that the surgery is irreversible".  I always say, "Thank god for that."

Take care and all the best for the future.

Love and Hugs
Sarah B
Official Greeter

[Maid Marion]

Men and women are judged differently.  When you are a guy it is very helpful to be a tall rich guy.  Not so much for women, who are judged more on how you look. If you look good as a women, you not only get the benefit of the doubt, but some folks will show obvious favoritism toward you.  Sometimes I think that if the "Karens" of the world got treated as nicely as I did, they wouldn't have to be "Karens!"

This is why the beauty industry is huge.  Women work at looking good because they get treated better if they are successful at looking good.

What can happen is that men who get the lucky breaks that allow them to become women may discover that they are now "fish out of water."  They no longer get the lucky breaks because the rules have changed.

But, stealing from the story in "Charley Wilson's War," you never know whether a major event is really lucky or unlucky.
How can breaking your leg be a lucky break?  It may be if it keeps you from being drafted into a war!